Broken Youth

Chapter 33

~ Chapter Thirty-Three ~

••Harry••

I suppose your heart knows you better than your head, given the fact it pumps your fucking blood round your body. And that's pretty much all our body is; blood. But then again, you're heart doesn't know how long it's been beating and how long it will beat. It's got no track of time. So it'll grab every chance of love it can and take it and use it; fooling the body and the brain. That's why it aches; it never gets what it wants. And sometimes it aches more, because it gets what it wants and then the brain takes over and chucks what the heart wants, away. Our brains are clever. They know what the heart wants and what the heart needs. It takes that into consideration when you 'fall' for someone. It makes sure that person your supposedly 'falling' for is the right one. It's called falling for a reason; it hurts. But sometimes it has to see past the present pain and into the future to see if you're still in pain. You may fall for someone out of your league and way beyond anything happening at the time of the 'falling' and you'll be thinking 'why the heck have I fallen for them', but you won't see that your brain has negotiated with your heart. It's said 'sure, you can love them', knowing it's nothing at the time, but also knowing that in the future the relationship will soar. Your brain knows. We all fall for different people and for different reasons. We'll be tricked and manipulated, the brain thinking something that isn't true, or we'll simply have seen the person, the heart wanting it, the brain giving the green light and boom! you've fallen. And no matter how much it hurts, or how hard the impact is, there's a reason the brain said yes, even if you can't see it yet.

It was evident my brain knew me better than my heart. I wanted many others before Megan, and hell I would have had them if my brain hadn't been so damn stubborn. I couldn't and didn't fall for them because my brain knew there was someone else coming. So when I saw Megan and ogled her, dreaming of romantic days and freakishly sweaty nights and my brain finally said yes to my heart, I couldn't understand. Why her? Harrogate's biggest and hottest slut? The girl I couldn't ever have; she was human to say the least. It hurt falling in love with her when I knew she couldn't feel the same way. I didn't understand how the hell my brain was actually agreeing to this pain and 'it's never going to happen' shit. But turns out my brain was right; I did end up with her. And she loves me back. More than I could see before and fuck I was lucky to have her. She was beautiful as fuck and as compassionate as anyone I'd even known; she wasn't 'slutty': she was broken and confused. But now, she'd been set on solid ground, steady and in her own head. Just maybe a little insane for me.

*

Except for now. She was mad. She was shaking. And she was so out of control.

"Who the hell are you?"

The room fell silent, Megan's face growing redder by the second, her hands shaking and eyes firing arrows at the girl beside me. She already knew the answer and that's why angry tears were forming.

"I could say the same thing about you, you're new." Renée's voice was sarcastic and scathing, a smug smirk placed on her red lips.

"I think you already know who I am, darling."

"You thought right, darling." Luke's jaw tensed, his hands rolling into balls.

"So why don't you go ahead and tell me who you are." Megan's eyes were red with fire, the anger falling from her face in tears.

"His number one." She quirked her eyes brow yet again, the taunting glint in her eye making me shift in my seat.

"Who's number one?" Megan knew the answer. Why is she killing herself like this?