Someday I'll Know

Chapter 28 - "Thinking About Him"

Songs for this chapter:

- Viva La Vida by Coldplay

- Drunk by Ed Sheeran

- Numb by Nick Jonas

- Gravity by John Mayer

Liam's POV

I need my big brother to talk to, but I can't. No one could talk to me like him. If I ever see Jason again, I'll fucking kill him. Snap his neck or place something over his face until he can't breathe, or maybe hold his head under water until his legs stop kicking. I get no one really has these dark thoughts when alone, but I can't stand how Jason kills my brother then takes my girlfriend. How could Ariana even leave me, especially right now. I punch my bedroom wall even thinking about it.

"Honey are you okay?" My mom calls from downstairs. I don't answer, but she doesn't care. Her oldest is dead and she'll probably be crying for the rest of her life.

You need a drink.

I want to drown my sorrows away with alcohol. I've had one drink in my lifetime at a party, but now I want to drink until it doesn't hurt.

You're only 20.

I go downstairs and no ones here anymore. They couldn't see my brother because his body hasn't shipped to Ohio yet. I search the kitchen cabinets for anything alcohol related, I find two pints of Fireball but it's not enough. Would Ariana care if I got drunk and got into a wreck? Would she care if I died?

Let's try it out.

Ariana's POV

Should I go visit Jason when I'm continually thinking about Chase? This isn't good at all. Being home alone this morning is messing with my head. My dad's always at one of his jobs. Ugh. Sometimes I wish he was ditching me to be with a girl or someone, but he's my dad.. I think I need to join a church, I haven't been since my mom's left. She'd be disappointed.

I need a car, but my dad would never let me own one. I call Liz for her to pick me up, she takes me back to our dorm.

"Have you talked to Jason?" I crisscross on my bed.

"No, have you?"

"Not at all. I wanted to see him today but," I don't want to tell her because I was thinking of Chase shirtless, "but I didn't have a ride."

"Do you still want to go?"

"Nah, let's give him space right now. He needs it."

"True, true. So when's your birthday? You've never told me."

"June 26th."

"Wow that's a long time from now." Liz laughs. "You'll be turning 20 right?"

"Yes ma'am."

"You're so young and cute."

"Thanks?" I giggle at her comment.

"Jason is a great guy, be his everything if you commit. He doesn't need-"

"I will. I am." I don't hesitate which actually surprises me.

David opens the door without knocking. "I know I should've knocked, but I want to tell y'all I'm sorry. Mostly you Liz." He walks over to hug Elizabeth. He comes over to hug me with open arms.

"What about Jason? Are you going to forgive him? Or at least apologize." Liz rolls her eyes.

"Yes, that's the first step to moving on right?" He sits on the edge of her bed.

"Hannah too? I mean at least talk to her about what happened."

"No." David stares at me. "Never again will I let her take my heart and throw it around."