BROKEN PIECES.

CHAPTER 4| MY GIRL.

We walk to his house and it looks like it’s down the road. We stop outside this beautiful big house. Thando and I look at each other.

“ this is where you live?. ” thando asks him.
“ Yes. ” he opens the gate for us and we get in. He closes it again. We follow him then be opens the kitchen door.
“ Wow thato you have a beautiful home.” He looks at me and smiles.
“ Thank you sunshine. Let me show you the house then we will have breakfast and begin studying.” We nod.
He shows us the whole house and it is beautiful. They have a four bedroom house with two bathrooms excluding his parents one. A double garage, a big kitchen and this huge beautiful open plan living and dining room.
“ and this is my bedroom.” He says opening the door.
“ ooohhhh. ” thando says and we laugh.
“ it’s beautiful too. ” he grins. He has a abed bigger than mine I think it’s a double bed, a chair, table that has his laptop, books and other things. His wardrobe and a little couch. I wish I had parents and a home. Even if it was shack I would have been happy cause I would have been with my family.
“ jabs are you okay?. ” thando asks.
“ Yeah I am. Let’s go study. ”
“ I had already prepared sandwiches. I’ll make us coffee. ” thato says.
“ Is it okay if I watch TV?. ”
“ yeah thando help yourself. Come and help me please?. ”
“ sure. ”
“ you too behave in there. ”
“ Does she have a filter?. ”
“ I doubt she does. ” we laugh.
“ Sit I’ll make it. ”
“ but you asked me to help you?. ”
“ I wanted you here with me. What’s wrong?. ”
“ there’s nothing wrong. Why do you ask. ” I sit in the chair and he comes and turns me around to face him.
“ the whole week you’ve been off even when I try to talk to it’s like your mind is somewhere else. ”
“ I’m just stressed about the exams that’s all. ”
“ you know you can trust me right?. ” I can’t tell him what I think is happening to me. I wouldn’t even know where to start.
“ I know thato. Sometimes I just wish I had a family too you know. Live like this with the people who love me. I just wish I knew who my parents are and why they decided to give me away.” He pulls me to him and hugs me. I hug him back.
“ Are they treating you good in there jabu cause it looks like you’re the only who’s treated differently. ”
“ I’d good is me having a roof over my head and a bed to sleep on and food then yes. They are treating me good. He takes a deep breath and I know he wants to ask more but I’m not ready to open up. The only person I used to open up to is zuki but she doesn’t see me as her friend anymore and thando well I’m still getting to know her and thato. I’m afraid to open myself up to them and tell them what is happening to me. I am scared.
“ Jabu… . ” I really hate my name.
“ the water is boiling. ” he sighs.
“ look at me. ” I look up at his face. He brings his face close and kisses me lightly.
“ I like you jabu a lot and I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you and you can trust me okay?. ”
“ Okay.” He gives me another kiss then he makes us coffee. Thando comes we eat, chat and laugh then we begin to study. I thought it was going to be hard concentrating but it wasn’t. We answered most of last year’s questions papers and where we had trouble thato helped us. I wish zuki was here too cause I know she struggles with it and she was going to benefit on this study group. We have been studying from 10 am and now it’s 14:30pm. We decide to call it a day.
“ My sister is going to be here at 3pm.”
“ Then we better get going.” I begin packing my books and notes.
“ I wasn’t saying that so you can leave. We haven’t even had lunch guys.” he says.
“ I’m still full thato.” He frowns.
“ Well I’m hungry.”
“ There’s some left over food from yesterday inside my mom’s Tupperware in the fridge. You  an have it but warm it first incase if it’s a little cold.” He looks at me and he wants to laugh.
“ yum. I can’t wait to taste it.” She leaves excitedly.  We both laugh.
“ If thando says the food is bad then I’m going to believe that your mom’s cooking is really bad.” He takes my hand andstands me in my feet.
“ Let’s go to my room. ”
“ Thato… ”
“ I want to cuddle with you.”
“ we can still cuddle here.”
“ I don’t want thando to see us plus I want to kiss you too.”
“ I’m not ready to have sex thato.” I look down. He lifts my chin up with his finger.
“ I’ll never force you to do anything you don’t want to do. I promise baby.”
“ Okay.”
“ just scream wena jabs of he tries anything stupid and I’ll knock that door out.” She says sitting down and eating. Thando is…..something else. “ go on now.” We both laugh.
I’m suddenly scared. What if he wants me to take my top and cardigan off then see those marks on my body. What will he think and say?. He closes his bedroom door and I stand there awkward.
“ okay I’ll leave it slightly ajar.” I nod.
I walk to his table and see his picture with his family.
“ Your mom’s beautiful, and your sister. The pictures of her in the living are amazing. Your dad too. ”
“ I’ll tell him you said he’s beautiful.”
“ you know what I mean.” I hide myself on his chest. He wraps his hands around me and I do the same. We just there like that and for the first time in my life I feel safe.
“ This feels good.”
“ it does.”
He pulls my hand and we walk to the bed. He takes off his shoes, I take off mine. He lays on his side facing me and I am facing up.
“ haw sunshine looks at me please.” I turn my head and look at him. He smiles and I smile too. I have never seen anyone who has dark gums. His gums are as dark as his skiing and his teeth pearly white.
“ you’re handsome and you have a beautiful smile.” He laughs.
“ you’re making me blush.” I giggle.
“ oh please. ”
“ How about that lesson then.”
“ Which one?. ”
“ this one.”
He pulls my head closer to his and kisses me deeply and oh god it feels good. His body gets closer to mine and we kiss deeply. His hand pull my body flush against his, one of his legs gets between mine and the kiss gets deeper.
“ touch me. ” he breathes in me.
“ how……”
“ like this. ” his hands brushes my back softly creating sensational feelings then move down my ass and he lightly grabs it while pushing his hips in me and he groans and I moan.
He quickly gets up and gets between my thighs and I freeze.
“ Thato… . ”
“ We’re just kissing baby that’s all. I promise. ” he talks taking deep. Breathes then claims my lips.
I feel something that that keeps growing between us. I gasp then his hands touch my stomach and I freeze. I pull my lips away from him.
“ please stop.” He does and buries his head on my neck breathing out deeply.
“ I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to push you. ”
“ it’s okay but we have to go home.”
“ I know but I don’t want you to go back there.”
“ it’s the only home I have ever known.”
“ I know. Can I get a hug then. ” he is sending chills all over my body and my body shudders.
“ Get up then. ”
“ I want it like this.”
I wrap my arms around him and kiss his shoulder. He groans.
“ Your poking me thato, get up.” He laughs.
“ I’m trying to calm him down but he refuses.”
“ Get up, so I can give you space to sort yourself out. ”
“ you have a girl in your room?.” Says a shocked little voice. Thato quickly get up and I do too and wear my shoes. “ mom told you no more girls in your room thato. ” I look at him and he throws a pillow to her sister.
“ get out of my room Palesa!. ” she looks at me and smiles then leaves.
“ It’s not what you think or how she put it.”
“ it’s okay. ” it’s not I’m hurt. “ you’ll find us in the kitchen.
“ jabu?... ” I close the door behind me.
“ thando let’s go.” I take my bags.
“ Hi, I’m Palesa and Thato is my older brother. Are you his girlfriend?. ”
“ Hi Palesa. I’m jabu. Bye. ” thando looks at me then she takes her bag too. “ tell your brother we left.” I take thando's hand and we leave.
“ what happened?.”
“ I think he has a girlfriend.”
“ What? No?. ”
“ yes. His little sister said their mom told thato that he shouldn’t bring girls in his room.”
“ But that doesn’t mean he might have another girlfriend other than you. ”
“  and maybe I’m just another girl he wants to hit it with.”
“ Ay jabu he likes you. He wouldn’t gave you his phone and.. ”
“ Let’s leave it thando.”
“ So….. How was the kiss and cuddling?. ”
“ It was… uhm good.” She looks at me. “ ok fine great, amazing!. ” she screams then we laugh.
When we get home I get tons of messages from thato apologizing and asking me to answer his calls but I just ignore them. I am really hurt because I really like thato but I am scared that maybe he just wants sex from me then he will dump me like I never existed.
“ Thando?.”
“ hmm?. ” we are in my room.
“ Can you sleep with me?. ” he eyes get big. I laugh and throw a pillow at her and she laughs too.
“ you want us to have a sleep over?. ”
“ yeah. Will you?.”
“ I thought we weren’t allowed to sleep in each other’s rooms?.”
“ I know but they won’t see you. I don’t feel like sleeping alone tonight.” I can’t tell her the real reason why I want her to sleep in my room.
“ are you scared of something?.”
“ why would I?.” I laugh it off.
“ just asking that’s all.” She looks at me.
“ We will wait for everyone to sleep then you’ll sneak in right?.”
“ oh I can’t wait. We are going to gossip all night.” We laugh.
That makes me feel better. I know that maybe I won’t wake up with marks on my body and headaches since thando will be sleeping over. Well I hope we both won’t but what if the same thing happens to her and..
“ Jabu answer your phone.”
I look at it and it’s thato.
“ I don’t want to talk to him.”
“ maybe you should hear him out jabs.”
I send him a text message that I’ll see him at school Monday.

It's sunday afternoon and we are sitting outside with thando enjoying the warm sun and listening to music on her phone when one of the security gaurds cwalks towards us. Thando and I look at each other wondering why he's looking at us and making his way where we are sitting.
" Eh mantombazane?."
" yebo bhut' fana?."
" Can you go and buy me ikota please. I forgot my lunch box at home." he says taking out a fifty rand note.
" yemalini ikota?." I ask him.
" le ye R30 ne half litre ye coke." we take the money and leave
" That's weird don't you think?."
" what?." thando asks. Her eyes are glued on the phone.
" why did he asks us when he could have asked anyone."
" Exactly and he asked us. Stop over thinking things jabs." yeah shes right.
When we turn on the corner I see thato with his friends and he's sitting like he was expecting us. He gets up and walks to us.
" hey guys." he greets us
" Hi we." thando smiles.
" Uhm jabu can I talk to you?." he brushes his hair. He sounds nervous.
" sure. Jabs give me the money. You'll find me at the shop." she takes the money and walks to the shop. We follow her.
" Why are not you answering my calls baby?."
" I don't want to talk to you."
" How am i going to explain when you just left like that and won't hear me out?. That's not fair baby."
" explain then." he laces our hands together. I let him.
" I used to date this girl and mom caught me with her in my room twice only. It was just one girl twice and I never brought her at my house until we broke up last year. I haven't brought anyone ever other than my friends of course until you." I don't say anything.
" my sister made it sound like I bring different girls to our house and in my room and that's not it. I swear baby."
" do you really like me or you just want to have sex with me thato?."  he shakes his head an stops walking.
" is that what you think I want from you? Sex only?."
" I don't know. Do you?."
" I don't!. I really like you jabu hell I think I am falling for you. I can't think straight when I'm with you or even think about you. When I'm near you I want to look at you, touch you and feel you because I love you. Not just because I'm lusting after your beautiful body. Tell me you don't feel the same way about me and feel the things I feel?."
I look down but he palms my face with his hands and makes me look at him. He pulls me body close to his and looks at me.
" Tell me you don't feel this connection between us. This love baby."
" I feel it too but I'm scared thato. I don't want to be hurt and..."
He shuts me up with a deep passionate kiss and wraps his arms around my back. I kiss him back and it feels so good.
" thato we are in the middle of the street and people are watching."
" let them watch, I want them to know that you are my girl. My one and only." he kisses me one last time then we walk. I hide my face on his chest and he laughs.
" Your kissing is getting better." I lightly punch him and he laughs.
We find thando at the shop waiting for the order and some guys is trying to talk to her but she's on her phone and ignoring him.
" I won't hurt you jabu. I promise you." I nod.
" can I ask you something?."
" sure baby?."
" I know you've had sex before and I know that people in relationships have sex and so I want to know if are you also going to expect us to have sex soon?." he smiles and looks away.
" I do want us to be intimate but we will do that when you are ready. I will never force you to do anything you don’t want to do." 
" I have never had a relationship before and I have never...."
" I know baby. I know and I won't put pressure on you I promise. If it ever happens that I make you feel pressured or I'm doing something you don't like please tell me."
" I will." he smiles.
" Order ready lets go back."
Thato walks with us and we hug each other then he leaves after giving  me a peck on my cheek.