BROKEN PIECES.

CHAPTER 18| I MISSED YOU

JABU.

A week has passed since we've been here. I really love this home allot because it also has a big backyard and a swimming pool. Aunty Natasha left three days ago and I can't help feel like maybe she will tell Dan where we are and with whom but Thato assured me that she will not. I asked him if he knew that his aunt was having an affair with Dan and he wasn't shocked. He told me he once caught them but Dan had promised him it was a one time thing and will not do it again.
He told me not to worry about it he will handle it whatever that means. They keep leaving early in the morning with his uncle and some of his men and they would come back late afternoon. I haven't asked him where they go to. Thando has forgiven me for trying to leave her behind. She loves the house too like me. She told me she got a message from Phumla whi asked him where I was cause he heard that we left town and no longer live in Secunda and she told him that we had to leave. I wish she didn't say that cause I don't want thato to think I'm still in contact with him and make things awkward between us.
I have been seeing a therapist for three days. She comes in the house and we would have our sessions there. She's also seeing thando separately. On my first sessions I couldn't talk. I cried allot and she just let me be then on our second and third that's when I began to open up to her when she asked me how I grew up. I didn't realize that I have always felt alone. That I knew I can only depend on myself and no one else. She told me that's understandable because of the way and where I grew up but sometimes I shouldn't be scared of allowing to get to know me and be vulnerable around them cause not everyone is a monster and out there to hurt me.
We talked about allot of things and it made me feel better. I'm glad though she hasn't asked me about the rape and all. I don't know if they told her or not but when I'm ready to talk about it I will but for now though I'm not. Seeing the look on thato's face when he found that it was his stepfather who raped me was somehow comforting cause I could see how hurt he was. I thought maybe he wont believe me and accuse of lying on his stepfather but he didn't.
I could have died had he not came at that time. Every time I think about it I get flashbacks of what happened that day. The therapist prescribed some pills to help me sleep and to deal with the trauma. She's worried that I might slip into a ndepression. I'm scared that I might have to take pills my whole life. I get off the bed and walk to the bathroom and splash water on my face. Thank God they went to the mall and brought us clothes. Thando and aunty Natasha went and I stayed behind with Palesa. She left yesterday with thato cause his mom threatened to call the police on him if he didn't bring back his sister. I miss her terribly and I hope her mom will keep her safe.
The whole house is silent as I walk to the kitchen. They are all sleeping obviously cause it's midnight. I open the fridge and take a bottle of milk and pour the milk on the cup I take from the cardboard then sit down.
" Still struggling to sleep? " I almost scream.
" Thato. Don't sneak up on me like that "
" I thought you saw me walking in "
" I didn't."
" Why aren't you in bed? "
" I just wanted some milk "
" Can I have some too? " I frown.
He sits down and I pour him some milk too then we sit in silence. He just watches me not drinking his milk. I don't know what he's thinking and I don't know if I do want to know.
" Drink your milk and stop starring at me "
" Do you hate me? " I shake my head.
" I don't hate you thato. Why would you think that? "
" Because we hardly talk."
" You're always gone and come home late. Where do you and your uncle go? "
" I can't tell you but I will when the time is right "
" Are you with her. Do you go to her? "
" I'm not with her. I haven't seen or talked to her the day I left with you and came here. I'm not lying about that I promise you. "
" Ok "
" Don't be mad at me please "
" I don't like it that you're keeping things from me "
" Even it's to protect you? "
" Promise me you wont ever lie to me and you'll tell me what is going on when the time is right "
" I promise you."
" I'm going to bed " I get up.
" want me to tuck you in? " I raise my eyebrow at him. " I just want to hold you that's all. Please? "
" Okay "
He takes my hand and we go to my bedroom. We get in bed and he pulls me closer to him and I lay my head on his chest and sigh. He holds me tight like I'm going to run away from him.
" I missed this. Holding you like this."
" I did too. Allot. I'm so happy you're right here with me "
" I will always be here."  He kisses my forehead. " I have to go back to Newcastle. The family has called a meeting for me. " I look up at him.
" Is it about you breaking up with her ? "
" Yes baby and also about them knowing that I chose you and nothing is going to change that "
" Do they know about Dan not being your dad? "
" I wouldn't be surprised if they do but I think they don't know cause if they did then they wouldn't have forced me to marry boni.
" They still could if they knew how rich your dad actually is. Are you going to face them alone? "
" My aunt is going to be there and my uncle wants to be there so they wont gang up on me. Especially my mother. "
" Has aunty Natasha said anything about...Him? "
" Don't worry yourself with him. He's never goin to hurt you again. Ever."
" What does that mean? "
" Exactly that baby. Trust me "
" So when are you leaving? "
" Tomorrow " I keep quiet. " The housekeepers and guards are here and they will make sure that you have what you need and protected."
" When are you coming back? "
" As soon as we're done."
" You promise me you will come back? "
" I promise you sunshine "
" Is Palesa your half sister or? "
" We did DNA and she is my sister. I wonder why my mother lied about that to my dad."
" Maybe she was scared that your dad will take you away."
" Maybe baby I don't know why she would lie. My uncle is still investigating the orphanage and about you. As soon as he finds anything I will let you know."
" What if I really don't have a family or my family abandoned me? "
" You have a family and that's us. The people who love you and that isn't going to change even if we find your real family."
" You and thando are my family. No matter what "
" I need you to do something for me "
" What? " I look at him.
" I need you to unblock Phumla and talk to him."
"  What? Are you serious? "
"  I am serious baby. As much as I hate to admit it, he was there for you when I wasn't. He cares about you and probably loves you too so he needs to know that you are okay but only that Jabu. Nothing more cause I won't be able to watch you be friends with a guy that I know loves you and wants you. I can't."
" Thank you for that. How did you know I blocked him? "
" He's been coming to Natasha's house asking for you and when my aunt got back she found him outside the gate. She said he was really worried about you then he heard from that boy that dated zuki that she told him you left town."
" I'll talk to him tomorrow."
" Did you develop feelings for him? "
" I did after what you did to me. Ignoring me and forgetting my birthday. He was there "
" I still owe you an amazing gift and you will get it."
" You have already given it to me "
" What you mean? "
" You're looking for my parents so to me that means everything cause I want to know why and how I ended up at the orphanage."
" We will find out the truth. I won't stop."
"  Thato? "
" Baby? "
" Don't break my heart again."
" I love you too much to do that to you again. I'm sorry I did."
" Has your heart ever been broken before by a girl? "
" No it hasn't but lying to you broke my heart. Are you planning on getting revenge on me? " I keep quiet
" Hmmmm "
" Ha baby? " I giggle and he tickles me.
I laugh loud as he tickles me begging him to stop but he doesn't.
" I'm gonna pee at myself if you don't stop Raphael! "
I continue to laugh until I realize he has stopped laughing and tickling me.
" I'm sorry I...."
" Say it again. Say my name again" His voice changes.
" Raphael "
" J'ai su au moment ou je t'ai vu allonge la que je voulais passer le reste de ma vie avec toi. Je vais t'epouser un jour et tu porteras mes enfants en toi. Je vais parcourir le bout du monde pour m'assurer que vous etes heureux et toujours aime. C'est ma promesse." he speaks French fluently not that I know how a fluet French speaking person sounds like but he sounds so....amazing.
" What did you just say? " He smiles. He kisses my cheek.
" I knew the moment I saw you lying down there lifeless that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I'm going to marry you one dayand you will carry my children in you. I'm going to walk through the ends of the earth to make sure that you are happy and always loved. That's my promise to you." Wow. I smile.
" I love hearing you smile and seeing you smile. Thank you for that."
" Where did you learn to speak French."
" My aunt got me a tutor when I was 9 years old. My mother would think that I'm just attending extra classes at school."
" So she doesn't know you speak French? "
" She now knows and she's scared to ask me cause she knows I know that Dan isn't my father."
" Maybe she's getting strength to ask you or she knows it's your aunts doing "
" I don't care."
" What's your dad's name? "
" His name is Nicholas Alarie, he's 45 years old and he's from Senegal but currently lives in London running his empire there. You will meet him when he comes in the city. He's going to love you baby."
" Have you ever been to Senegal? "
" I haven't baby and I don't get to see him as much as I want to. My uncle told me that I will go Senegal when I'm 25 cause they are afraid that if their uncle knows about me and now dimples. he will kill us so he can inherit his fortune. He thinks my father doesn't have any children."
" You have to teach Palesa and I French too "
" You're right baby so we can be one of those couples that gossip " we both laugh then I yawn. " Sleep sunshine "
" Yeah I'm feeling sleepy " I turn around and he spoons me. " I don't want to wake up and find the bed empty in the morning. Please wake me up when you leave."
" I will baby "
We thread our hands together and I fall asleep. knowing that with him next to me. Nothing will hurt me. I feel safe. I love him. I really do and I just hope he will be patient with me until I am able to be with him physically.
He woke me up in the morning before he left. I hugged him tight and I shed a few tears cause the last he went to Newcastle he totally forgot about me and he still might. That's what scares me. He promised me though that he's coming back and I have to believe him. I'm sitting outside the porch with thando who's sipping on her ice tea.
" I heard you guys laughing last night." I smile. " It was nice to hear you laughing "
" Yeah we were just talking and he started tickling me "
" That doesn't make you feel..you know since..."
" I thought I would hate his touch too but I don't know thando. Being around him makes me feel safe and I don't freeze when he tries to touch me. His touch is comforting to me."
" I'm just glad you two are trying to fix things and you're here with us."
" I'm sorry " I apologize to her again.
" I know just that....You're the only family I have Jabs. You're my sister and..."
" I will never try to leave you again I promise. I won't hurt you again sis." We hug each other.
" You won't believe what he told me "
" What"
" He said I must unblock Phumla and talk to him cause he's worried about me. He knows phumla deserves to know that I am okay cause he loves me and was there for me but I can't be friends with someone who loves me too"
" Ncoooh. Call him now."
I take my phone and go through my contacts and unblock Phumla. I hold my breath and call him and it rings, rings and rings. Just when I'm about to hang up he picks up and doesn't say anything. I can hear him breathing though.
" Phumla?....I know you can hear me " He still keeps quiet. " I'm sorry I blocked you and just disappeared on you. I..." he hangs up on me.
I sigh and close my eyes.
" He hanged up? "
" Yeah he did "
" Give him time. He's hurt too. He will understand once you explain to him why we had to go."
" I can't tell him that thando. I will just tell him that something happened that forced us to leave."
I try to call him again but then he hangs up then it sends me straight to voice mail when I try to call him again. I hurt him and I have to apologize.