Here is your review! I hope it helps you, and be sure to thank your reviewer, Mochis4lifeq52627!
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User- @RGNPBTLV
Book- Daisy Blue World
Genre- Teen Fiction
Link to the book --------------->
Cover- From what I can tell so far, your cover is not only beautifully simplistic and illustrated, it also matches the story. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that would be Daisy, right? It's a really pretty cover, and I really don't have much criticism for it except that the author's name isn't as visible as some books, though that can either be easily changed, or kept, since the cover is already so beautiful.
Title-Okay, the title is very pretty. "Daisy Blue World'. Trust me, I have never used this word before, but it's so aesthetic. I'm just so calm while reading it. Anyone else? I don't know how it relates to the book. I get the Daisy part. Maybe Daisy is stuck in her own world? The blue part gets past me, but who cares? The reader wants to know more about this daisy blue world, and how to get there.
Blurb-Okay, I can see the plot from your blurb. You're giving away a good amount of information about the story. You don't give any ending away, but we can see how some stuff might unravel. It's good, but just be cautious, okay? Never give too much away. I'm preaching now probably.
Another thing about your blurb. Your grammar and spelling is great, good punctuation, I can tell that you're very comfortable with English. However, you revolve between past, present, and occasionally future tense as well. I wouldn't do that, because some people are grammar freaks who will read your blurb, and they may be very put off by this. But OH MY GAWD the last two lines were amazing, I can sense a romance (maybe, maybe I'm just overexcited), but crossing my fingers for a romance. But overall, your blurb is a good description of what's about to happen.
Characters-Here we come to the characters! The first chapter does a good job of introducing Bryson and Daisy. Bryson seems to be this impatient, hardened, tough and military man. The way you begin his character is good, I enjoy how you did it. He must have a soft side though-because he immediately was somewhat attracted (?) to Daisy. I wonder, will you show more of this soft side later? I hope so, because that's a key part of character development, and anyone should include it if they include a detail that hints to it.
His inner voicing is really good to, it hints that he has a practical, yet a humorous side. Daisy seems like a happy-go-lucky sort of fellow with a big smile and kind face. I would be like (NOOOOO-), because she seemed very much like all the good girls, except then you introduced the reader to her not being able to communicate vocally, and now I'm intrigued!
THis goes straight onto my reading list. SettingNot much for this one, because you have set the scene masterfully! I can tell the sun is shining into this merry little flower shop and he's impatient and there are over happy store clerks, and then suddenly a dreamy wind whooshes, and there, standing, is the love of his life, whom he cannot understand because she communicates through sign language. Basically, godo job at setting up the scene.
Plot-Okay, so the blurb gave away where the story is going. Maybe a little too much. But we can still guess on some details. I can immediately see a romance plot (please tell me it's romance), and some difficulties and conflicts arising from her not being able to speak vocally. This story has a steady path, it immediately makes the reader root for a specific "ship", and we are guessing on how the romance will develop. So, overall, from what I can see, a great plot!
Other Comments- Sorry for spamming so much. I occasionally do that, and it is my very bad. You often switch between past, present and future tenses even within the story. Check the area I mentioned, where you talk about the military school. Great descriptions, but you shift between tenses, and the flow is a bit interrupted, which can be annoying for a reader. However, your character and family development is on a great start, you keep the reader excited to read, your setting and descriptions skills are great, and your story looks original, so it gets a humongous thumbs up from me! Final Note: You might want to check your comma placing and tenses, and maybe shorten the blurb a few just to not disclose too much information.
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