(EDITING) #StillAlive [Jikook/Zombie AU]

23.

Jungkook's P.O.V.

I knew it would happen. I knew once the smaller would open his eyes and his head would clear up from the sedatives, Jimin will go crazy.

There was no 'maybe' or 'hopefully'. Jimin will try to escape. He will completely lose himself into panic. He will fight without caring.

What can you expect? A child that went through torturous pain almost every day for hours on repeat, who only knew the ache of his body, never tasted freedom up until he escaped the facility.. No matter who would have tricked Jimin, that person would be his target.

I wish I at least gave him a chance to willingly agree to come with me. I wish I didn't took such a big decision away from him. I didn't even gave him the opportunity to state his opinion.

I only saw the worry in his eyes and knew that I messed up the moment I drugged him. I messed up when he woke up and realized what was happening. I messed up in trying to calm him. I messed up when I didn't fight back his hands, wrapped around my throat, ready to kill.. I deserve every little bit of his anger.

But, he also deserves mine. No matter how happy I am to have Jimin with me again, the way something inside me would grow warm and make me feel comfortable and excited, he still lied too.
He was selfish to not go to Busan. He knew he would be the cure to all this mess.

On the other hand; Jimin is traumatized. I clearly saw it just now how intense he reacted. The desperate begs to be let go, the helpless screams and the pure look of horrific fear in his eyes.

He looks vulnerable, leaning his head on Taehyungs shoulder, Namjoons jacked thrown over his body, while he sleeps. Exhausted and tired mind and body, puffy and red eyes, bloody bitten lips, skin pale, almost sickly white.

Those two switched from time to time, when their shoulders would get tired or ached. Never once allowing me to keep the smaller close. Understandable.

We all are on edge, not wanting Jimin to wake up in my arms again and have another meltdown. It was safer for me and for him.

While Jimin slept peacefully, Namjoon made sure to sedate his body once again. We are close to Busan and if Jimin would be awake, we were sure that we would have to drag him inside. Another fight which we clearly don't want. It was easier and less harmful for all of us if Jimin slept through until he would be in his room.

Or mine.
Well, the others don't need to know that.

Once we arrive in Busan again, I didn't let them tell or warn me to not go near Jimin. I simply wrapped my arms around him and didn't give a single flying fuck about what they had to say.

Something inside of me had the intense urge to protect the smaller. To keep him away from others but safe with me. They don't know Jimins past, they don't feel for him what I feel.. He's still just a betrayer in their eyes, yet it was not hate but disappointment what they felt for him.

I feel disappointed too, yes, but I feel so much more than that. I feel guilty, anger for myself. Around Jimin I feel okay, like the worlds misery is gone. I feel as if there is spring and summer inside me. Attraction blooming, affection fluttering, passion burning.

He's not a betrayer in my eyes. He's not the villain. Jimin is scared and hurt, traumatized from the start of his life and never had a chance to heal from it. Life really treated him badly and I will make sure that changes.

Where will I start? Well, if you want to change something, always go for the top. The cause of all of this.
His parents.

I lay Jimin in my bed, make sure he's tucked in and leave a little peck on his cold forehead before leaving my room. I ignore the others calling and running after me.