Chapter Thirty- Two

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     I'm knee deep in glass. The table is shattered, so is my dignity. So let me catch you up. Table still broken, Asher still in school, Julia still not talking to Blake. I don't know what I would say to him if I talked to him. I thought everything was okay, but he just isn't the same guy anymore. I can't even think about him, but I can think about Kara. I pick up my phone and FaceTime her before walking to school. "Jules?" "Yeah it's me. Have you seen the news?" "Yeah it got all the way back to New Jersey." "Why didn't you tell me?" "I tried to! When I called you that morning in the hotel, I was trying to tell you to stay away from him. But no, you wouldn't let me." "You could've kept trying. But like always you gave up as soon as you could." "You know what Julia. I don't know how you have these great friends and this great boyfriend." "He's not that great"

  "See what I mean? Nothings ever good enough for you. I gave you everything you ever wanted." "Everything I ever wanted? The only thing I want is to be cancer free!" "Oh boo hoo. Throw your own pity party cause I'm don't throwing it for you! You will never be anything in this world but an entitled bitch!" I felt a tear run down my face. "Wow, who the hell is that?" My nose sniffles. "Seb, this is Kara." I hand him the phone. "So this is your little side piece?" "I'm not her side piece. If anything she's mine." "Oh course, nobody wants Julia." "Hey, plenty of people want her." "You don't, and it's clear she wants you." "Shut up Kara, god your such a bitch." "You know what Seb, you're really cute. Are you single?" "Nope." "Well call me when you are." "I'd rather take my chances with a hyena. Oh and I like dress." "Thank you." "But it gives you back fat." "What!" *Beep* "Ding dong the bitch is gone."

   I run over to the corner to wipe my tears away. "Julia you ready?" "No." He could hear the whimper in my voice. "Did what she say, get to you?" "Yeah, maybe a little." "No, this is more than a little. She broke you." "She didn't break me, okay?" I was crying so hard I could barely get words out. "I know you all to well, to know when your lying to me." "You could say she broke me, or you could just say she hurt my feelings." "But she didn't, she broke you." "She's right. I am an entitled bitch." "You are no such thing." "I treat everyone like crap. Sawyer, my mom, you." "You obviously treat me pretty well, I mean in here aren't I?" "True." He pulled me in for a hug. "Thank you Seb." "For what?"

  "Teaching me what my greatest fear really is." "And what would that be?" "Blending in. I used to think that my greatest fear was standing out, but really I was just scared of blending in. I met Sawyer, Riley, Nora, Julian, Ian, Harvey. But none of them changed my life like you did. If it wasn't for you, I would probably be friends with Gigi. Which even though I helped with all the Asher stuff, she still doesn't like me." "She'll come around, I promise." "Don't make promises you can't make, promise?" "Promise." "I love my life, but I'm scared that one day I'm gonna wake up and it will all be gone. I already lost Blake, who's next? Sawyer, you?" "Hey, you will never lose me. You could kill someone and I would still love you to death." "What?" "I mean friends wise." "Right." "But I guess that way to. I don't think I'll ever really be over my crush." He pulled me in for a hug. I heard him sob. "Why are you crying?" "I have something to tell you. Your Mom told us a few weeks ago and we weren't suppose to tell you. But I can't just sit around and wait for you to hurt yourself." "Seb what is it?" "Your cancer spread to your spleen."

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