Simula

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Simula

     MATAMLAY akong naglalakad palabas ng kompanya, nakakapagod ang araw na 'to. Hapon na rin at mabuti nagpa-early leave ang boss namin, kaya ito, nag-aabang ako ng taxi sa may waiting shed.

Suddenly,  a taxi stopped in front of me. I hop in.

"Kuya sa Sunflower Village lang ako, salamat." Wika ko ng makasakay ako sa loob.

Because of boredom and I felt sleepy, I lean my head on the head rest. We stopped for a moment in front of an university, I smiled bitterly when I remember my good old college days. I also saw some stalls of street vendors, bunch of college students eating happily on those stalls.

I remember him...

Naalala ko dati, gan'yan rin ako. I feel like I have no problems in life and just want to enjoy my college journey. Pero ang laki ng pinagbago ko nang pumasok siya sa buhay ko.  He ruined my peaceful life back then in college days.

Hindi ko namalayan na maling daan na ang tinatahak namin. Hindi ito ang daan paauwi sa apartment ko. 

Saka lang ako napatingin sa driver seat at nanginig ang tuhod ko sa nakita. He's here.

"K-Kuya... pababain m-mo na ako... p-please." Mahina ngunit madiin kong sabi.

He stopped the car and there's an intense silence inside the car.  Nagbilang ako ng 10 segundo bago ko kapain ang handle para makalabas ng taxi, pero nakasara na ito.

"L-Let me go out, please. Ano bang kailangan mo?" I asked him.

But on my surprise, he just chuckled and remove his mask and get off his hoody. He fixed his hair and I saw his handsome face on rearview mirror.

I stopped myself from bursting into tears and looked away.

"Kamusta ka? " He asked.

Hindi ako makapaniwalang nilingon siya at dito bumagsak ang luha na kanina ko pa pinipigilang bumagsak. I felt stung in my heart.

"Ayan lang ang itatanong mo saakin?" Hindi ko makapaniwalang tanong sakan'ya. "5 years kang nawala... tapos ka-kamustahin mo ako na parang walang nangyari?! Ang kapal naman ng mukha mo!"

"You left me ruined! And now you're coming back while I'm on the process of moving on?" I added.

"Then let me fix you, hon. Let me." He sounds like begging that makes my heart softened.

"I wish I can let you, but I can't. You're the one who ruined me, so why would I trust again the destroyer of my heart?" I smiled bitterly and I saw his eyes reflects guilt, and the shadow of sadness peaking from it.

"Hindi mo na ako pwedeng makuha sa dati mong gawi, Atlas. Maging matapang ka naman. Ang sakit mo kasing magmahal eh, ang lakas mong magparamdam... pero ang sakit kapag hindi ko na maramdaman ang presensya mo sa paligid ko. Para akong minumulto ng nakaraan, Atlas. Sobrang sakit. " Naiiyak kong sumbong sakan'ya.

"Nakakatakot ka rin kasing mahalin, Chelsea."

Dito nag-angat ang tingin ko sa sinabi niya. 

"Nakakatakot sumugal kapag ikaw ang paglalabanan. I felt weak. Yung mga kalaban ko... walang-wala ako sakanila. And if I'm being on a war? I'm one of the soldier who has a gun but hasn't have any ammo to fire on." He confessed.

"But years passed, and I realize... I should join that war.  Because in the very first place, I caught your attention. I caught your heart. Kaya nagtataka rin ako sa sarili ko, bakit ako natatakot na sumugal kung sa una pa lang nakuha na kita? "

My eyes widened on his realizations and he looked at me. His eyes are also sparkling... at any moment he might tear up.

"I also wish that you realize it sooner, Atlas. Because right now... I don't care if you comeback or begged for me. I'm busy on myself, so please...let me go, can you? " I pleaded.


I didn't realize that unmasking him will unfold a lot of unknown truths in my life...

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