Crazy For You |Friends Fanfiction

Ch-21

<S1 E21>

-Nicolina's P.O.V-

   Everyone is at Monica and Rachel's looking at papers of Monica's.

Joey:How could someone get a hold of your credit card number?.

Monica:I have no idea.But look how much they spent!.

Rachel:Monica would you calm down?.The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought.

Monica:I know.It's just such reckless spending.

Nico:I believe when someone steals your credit card they've kinda already thrown caution into the wind.

Chandler:Wow what a geek.They spent $69.95 on a Wonder Mop.

Monica:That's me.

Phoebe:Oh!.The yuk!.Ross he's doing it again!.

   Phoebe points to a lamp which is shaking behind the sofa.

Ross:Marcel stop humping the lamp!.Stop humping!.Now Marcel come back-

Marcel runs toward Rachel's room.

Ross:Come here Marcel-

Rachel:Oh no not in my room!.I'll get him."Walks into bedroom".

Monica:Ross you've got to do something about the humping.

Ross:What?.It's,it's just a phase.

Chandler:Well that's what we said about Joey.

Ross:Would you all relax?.It's not that big a deal.

Rachel:Stop it!.Marcel!.Bad monkey!.

Ross:What?.

Rachel:Let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious.

   I start to laugh and laugh harder when Rachel tells me to stop but soon everyone joins in.

*Time Lapse*

   Me,Joey and Chandler are at Central Perk discussing stage names.

Nico:How about Joey...Pepponi?.

Joey:No still too ethnic.My agent thinks I should have a name that's more neutral.

Chandler:Joey...Switzerland?.

A waitress brings over our coffee.

Joey:Plus y'know I think it should be Joe. Y'know Joey makes me sound like im I dunno this big.

A Waitress looks at him funny.

Joey:Which I'm not.

Chandler:Joe...Joe...Joe...Stalin?.

Joey:Stalin...Stalin...do I know that name?.It sounds familiar.

Nico:Yeah I agree it does sound familiar.

Chandler:Well it does not ring a bell with me.

Joey:"Writes it down" .Joe Stalin.Y'know that's pretty good.

Nico:Might wanna try Joseph.

Joey:Joseph Stalin.I think you'd remember that.

Chandler:Oh yes!.Bye Bye Birdie starring Joseph Stalin.Joseph Stalin is the Fiddler on the Roof.

*Time Lapse*

Ross:"Enters,Upset".Hi.

Nico,Chandler,Joey:Hey.

Nico:Where've you been?.

Ross:At the vet.

Chandler:She's not gonna make you wear one of those big plastic cones is she?.

Ross:She says Marcel's humping thing's not a phase.Apparently he's reached sexual maturity.

Joey:"To Chandler".Hey!.He beat ya.

Ross:She says as time goes on he's gonna start getting agressive and violent.

Nico:So what does this mean?.

Ross:I'm gonna have to give him up

*Time Lapse*

Joey:I can't believe it Ross.This sucks!.

Chandler:I don't get it I mean you just got him.How can he be an adult already?.

Ross:I know.I know.I mean one day he's this little thing and before you know it he's this little thing I can't get off my leg.

Nico:Isn't there any way you can keep him?.

Ross:No,no.The vet says unless he's in a place where he has regular access to some...monkey loving he's just gonna get vicious.I've just gotta get him into a zoo.

Joey:How do you get a monkey into a zoo?.

Chandler:I know that one!...No that's Popes into a Volkswagen.

Ross:Well we're applying to a lot of them. Naturally our first choice would be one of the bigger state zoos y'know like uh San Diego...right?.But that might just be a pipe dream because y'know he's out of state.Uh my vet uh knows someone at Miami so that's a possibility.

Chandler:Yeah but that's like two blocks away from the beach.I mean it's a total party zoo.

Phoebe,Monica and Rachel enter the Cafe.

Phoebe:Hey.We found her we found the girl.

Nico:What?.

Joey:Did you call the cops?.

Rachel:Nope.We took her to lunch.

Chandler:Ah.Your own brand of vigilante justice.

Ross:What?.Are you insane?.This woman stole from you.She stole.She's a stealer.

Monica:Y'know what?.After you're with this woman for like ten minutes you forget all that.I mean she is this astounding person with this,with this amazing spirit.

Ross:Yeah which she probably stole from some cheerleader.

Chandler:Take off their hats!.

Phoebe:Popes in a Volkswagen!...I love that joke.

*Time Lapse*

   After a while Marcel finally has a place to go and everyone except Monica is at the Airport to see Marcel off.

PA:This is the final boarding call for flight 67 to San Diego boarding at gate 42A.

Phoebe:Okay.Goodbye little monkey guy. Alright I wrote you this poem.Okay, but don't eat it till you get on the plane.

Ross:Awe.Thank you Aunt Phoebe.

Phoebe:Oh.

Chandler:Okay bye champ.Now I know there's gonna be a lot of babes in San Diego but remember there's also a lot to learn.

Joey:I dunno what to say Ross.Uh it's a monkey.

Ross:Just,just say what you feel.

Joey:Marcel I'm hungry.

Ross:That was good.

Rachel:"Brings Marcel teddy bear".Marcel this is for you.It's uh just y'know something to um do on the plane.

Ross:Uh if you guys don't mind I'd like to take a moment just me and him.

All:Oh sure.Sure absolutely.

   I start to walk to another side of the room as my friends take a few seconds to follow.