Harboring Feelings >> Becstin

9

AUSTIN'S POV

I nervously bite the ends of my nails as I pace back and forth in front of my locker. I glance around the crowded hallway, but she's no where in sight.

"Are you okay?" I hear her sweet voice and I instantly relax.

"Am I okay? Are you okay? I heard what happened. Is everything alright?" I ask her sincerely.

No make up smeared eyes. Check.

No tears. Check.

Adorable smile. Check.

Noticing me gawking at her. CHECK.

I instantly look away.

"I'm fine, Austin. I'm completely fine." She says.

Yeah, you are.

"I was just checking up on you. How's things with him?" I spit out the last word bitterly.

I could treat her so much better than he can.

"We're breaking." She says quietly. My eyes widen. She chuckles and smiles at her shoes before she looks up at me.

"What I meant to say was we're on a break right now." She concludes.

Couldn't she just add the opposite word of down at the end of her previous sentence?

No. It's better if your just friends. You can't break the code. You've done enough damage talking to her as it is.

"Oh." Is all I respond with.

"Oh? Is that all you have to say?" She frowns.

"What do you want me to say? 'I hope you get back together, get married, and raise 20 kids.' Is that the response you wanted? Because from what I can tell right now is that you're a whole lot more happier without him around." I spew out before I could stop myself. I cover my mouth like I just let out a large burp. I look at her and her jaw is dropped.

"I-I didn't mean... I mean, I'm sorry. Becky. Ohmygod. I'm so sorry. I should not have said that." I stumble over my words.

"It's uh...it's alright. It's true, actually...what you said. I am a whole lot happier now that we aren't together." Her eyes spring open. "I mean we're still together, but just not together together." She explains herself.

"Yeah, I know." I reply.

A selfish part of me asks wants to say: You're always his. When will you give me a chance, sweetheart?

While another part urges her to get as far away from me as possible.

"Well, we should get to class. The last bell is about to ring." She looks down at her watch before we start walking to first hour. The watch has more of a masculine feel to it. Nothing you'd see any of the other girls wearing. But, then again Becky's not like other girls.

I mentally smack myself as I remember where the watch was from.

It's her father's old watch. He gave it to her so she would have an excuse to miss her curfew. I smile at the memory. I stayed up til 2 am until she came through that door.

"What are you smiling at?" She asks.

"Nothing." I grin, as the memory fades away from my mind. We walk to the entrance of our first class. I open the door for Becky, but she stands there an stares at me.

"You have these really adorable tiny dimples at the corners of your lips, you know that?" She says as she observes my smile.

I unconsciously press my lips into a thin smile, I unleash my upper lip first before I bite my bottom lip. Becky comes closer to me, and just when I think our lips will connect she slips past me to go through the door. I instantly feel my cheeks heat up when I realize she wasn't coming towards me to kiss me. I sigh before I walk into class.