Can This Be Real?

Chapter 23: Sisterly Love and Girl Talk

I seriously just can’t thank each and every single one of you enough for taking the time to read this story. The 8.4K+ reads is just insane. You don’t know how much I appreciate all of the comments and just your patience with how long it takes me to upload sometimes. Writing this has been so fun for me, so thank you all for showing it some love and I hope I can continue to keep you guys entertained. xo Kailiana

Derek POV

Just going through the motion. A day would go by and I wouldn’t be able to recall what exactly I did that day. I find myself just trying to keep myself occupied so I won’t dwell on the pain that I caused Bethany. Since that dinner, there has been absolutely no contact. No phone calls, no texts, no social media DMs, absolutely nothing. I have been miserable. Without her, I don’t have any clarity in my life.

I crazily decided to return to DWTS for season 20 as if I didn’t have a lot on my plate with the New York Spring Spectacular and preparing for the all-new Move Live on Tour. Traveling back and forth will be daunting but throwing myself into work is masking the emptiness I feel without her.

Meanwhile, all of my sisters have scheduled visits to New York for varying reasons. Sharee and her husband came for little getaway, Julianne was here to do a press tour with me for the announcement of our tour while Marabeth and Katharine came to attend a Tony Robbins speaking event. They all said that they also wanted to stop by New York to spend a little time with me before the craziness of the juggling the Radio City show, DWTS and Move tour begin but I know the real reason behind their visits. Each one of them are here to check up on me. They coincidently staggered their visits to make sure someone was around just in case I break down and open up about what has gone down with Bethany.

I love my sisters to death and normally I would be so open with them about everything but this time, it just hurts to talk about it. That’s why I think it motivated them to make sure to be there for me. Even if I wasn’t ready to talk about it, being around them and their craziness helped me enjoy life even for a little bit.

First up were Sharee and her husband. This trip was meant to be a romantic getaway for them without their kids. Except, the mom in Sharee couldn’t help but spend time comforting me and seeing right through my antics.

“You are crazy, Derek! You are taking on way too many things. You need some rest. You are either going to get sick, get hospitalized for exhaustion or worse…injured,” Sharee exclaims.

I answer, “I just need to keep myself busy. Having too much downtime is giving me too much time to think.”

“Too much time to think about Bethany, huh?” she asks. I lower my head not wanting to face the glaring eyes of my sister who knew it was the truth. She continues, “Babe, you know that any relationship you enter you would have to deal with issues like limited time with your busy schedule, long distance, famous exes and tabloid stories.  With Bethany, this being her first real adult relationship, there are new issues of insecurities, doubt and fear that you would have to work through; but you once thought that she was worth it. Worth the patience it would take for her to be ready and worth the commitment it takes to work through everything. You were once ready and willing to take on those challenges because you believed she was the one. We all believe she’s the one. What changed?”

I answer with honesty, “I scarred her with the pain of her first heartbreak and she walked away. She didn’t believe that what we had was worth fighting for and working through it. I can’t force her into feeling something right now that she isn’t ready for. Gawd, she’s only 19 and I’ve overwhelmed her. I built this façade of a happily ever after, fairytale in both of our minds and expected her to dive in, full-fledged committed to living out that dream with me. And she wasn’t ready, you can’t expect a 19 year old to be ready.”