TW/ Anxiety, implied self harm.
I've got this calamitous tsunami in the tips of my fingers, they won't stop shaking as I pace around my room like a soul without a body, or a ghost who hasn't found peace. I scratch and scratch at my skin like I am looking for a treasure hidden deep within the folds of my hand yet I am only met with agonizing pain and red scars, fresh and unable to heal.
I pick at my nail-polish once again, I damage the fragile nail on my finger and I don't seem to pay it any attention as I opt to find a distraction from the spiral happening in my chest. I forgot how to breath.
A ding from the smartwatch on my arm, why is my heart rate going up and what does it mean? is it anxiety floating in my throat, putting a barbed wire around my nerves and completely paralyzing me? or have I overthought myself to the brink of insanity once again?
The sound of the television plays faintly in the background, I am far too self-involved to pay attention to it.
Am I a faker? Or is this real?
Could it be that I am just convincing myself that there's something wrong me? Maybe my body fakes these fast heartbeats for the attention of the passersby in my life.
Why can't I simply calm down?
YOU ARE READING
Emotional Torture.
PoetryCollection of poems and pieces written about daily struggles and tackling big world problems from the eyes of a teenager. Warning: Some chapters might be triggering. Triggers include: Suicide Eating disorder Self harm
