More Than Fine. (Complete)

32- MTF Lovesong

      As they worked their way downstairs for the comedy show, Gia withdrew into herself. Nick seemed to sense it, and wrapped an arm around her. At the first opportunity, she pulled away, and the look in his eyes showed his hurt. That wasn't her intention, but she had to have some time to think this New Year's Eve kiss thing through, and his arm around her would keep her from thinking clearly.

     Unfortunately, even without his touch, clear thoughts were far away as a rush of battling emotions worked through her: fear, pain, hurt, anger, hope, and desire. As these thoughts clashed and raged within her, the present faded. When her mind finally began to resurface in the present, they were seated in the lobby and waiting for the comedian to be introduced. Somehow Jill ended up sitting to the left of Nick, with Gia on his right and Stephanie on her right. As Nick laughed at something Jill said, Gia felt the green monster growing within and clawing to get out. The one that only seemed to appear when Nick was involved. Jill's eyes gleamed with adoration as she smiled back at hm, and Gia's mind began another battle. Maybe she should just call it quits with Nick before things go any further, before she's so far gone that when he realizes what a broken mess she is and breaks things off it destroys her. Surely he would be better off with Jill.

     When the band started up and everyone cleared the chairs away, Gia, Nick, Evie, and Jill all stayed together and joined in on the fun. The band kept it lively with several interactive songs and line dances. When the first slow song began, Evie and Jill waved off and decided to take a break. Nerves were wreaking havoc with Gia as Nick pulled her close. She was still struggling with her thoughts of inadequacy in their relationship.

     "What's going on in that head of yours?" Nick lifted a hand to her forehead and rubbed the deep creases between her eyebrows.

     Gia stared up at him and blinked. It needed to be said, but once she put it out there it would surely mean the end of something that barely started. "I... you...". Did she even have words for this conversation? Her gaze shifted from his eyes to his mouth.

     "It's okay. Whatever you're feeling, let it out." He moved them to an empty spot so she could talk more freely, but they continued to move with the slow tempo.

     "You can do so much better than me."

     Now his brow creased. "Where's this coming from?"

     "I'm so broken." Tears began to surface and she fought to keep them back. "I freak out when people kiss me. I have trouble with physical affection. It's not fair to you. I don't want to hold you back."

     "Oh Gia. Gia." He pulled her tight against him. "Is this because of the conversation about a New Year's kiss? Don't you see, I'm broken too, and you strengthen me. In just the couple of days we've been together, I've felt more alive than I have in... in a long time." He cupped her chin in his hand and lifted her face up. "And that's without any kisses. You can take as long as you need. Hugs and hand holding are wonderful. They mean more with you than a kiss or anything with another woman has ever meant." The intensity in his eyes made it clear he meant every word he said.

     His words had the power to break down every wall and barricade Gia had constructed to protect herself, and she knew eventually he would work his way into every piece of her heart. Swallowing her emotions, she forced out a "thank you."

     He leaned down to her ear. "I don't deserve your thanks, but I'll keep working to earn it."

     "Hey lovebirds! What's up?" Evie's greeting jarred them from their moment. "The slow song's over, and the band's taking a break." She winked at the two who had been rocking back and forth to an imaginary tune.