Statehumans one-shots because why not? [SH crackfic]

28- ZOMBEH, ZOMBEH, ZOMBEH-EH EH-EH! WHAT'S IN YOUR HEEEEEEEEAD!!!

CRAP I'M SORRY I HAVEN'T POSTED IN FOREVER I WAS REALLY LAZY But it's not like anybody likes this book anyway so eh.

\-/-|-\-/

The states were vibin' in the living room. America, DC, New York, and California were in a meeting together in another section of the house, talking about the economy, so the states were left without supervision.

Louisiana had made a ton (Like the measurement) of iced sweet tea so the states were happy.

But of course, something had to interrupt their peaceful evening.

BOOM KAPOW KERCHOW WAIFHBWANJFAMBOW!!!

"What was that?!" Washington gasped.

"It was a big green... thing?! It crashed into Florida's mini petting zoo!" Maine announced from the hot air balloon that runs on cold air.

"WHAT?!" Florida gasped, running outside to check on her animals.

The states watched Florida leave, before shrugging and sipping on their tea. UNTIL Florida came sprinting back inside the house, panting because she was incredibly out of shape (#Relatable).

"THEY ATE cHARLES!" Florida cried.

"WHO DARED TO EAT cHARLES?!" Everyone stood up dramatically.

You see, cHARLES is Florida's one and only non-murderous pet loved by all of the states. cHARLES was gifted to the family by NZ. Yes, you guessed it, it's a kiwi bird. 

"IT WAS SOME WEIRD GREEN GUY-" Florida was interrupted by a deep almost human-like growl.

The states turned their heads slowly towards the large window that displayed their mess of a backyard.

"ZOMBIES! GET TO THE CORN BUNKER!" Iowa screeched.

The states started panicking and sprinted down to the basement, which was filled with lab supplies that some states used for experiments. Don't question the decapitated neon purple golden eagle (They couldn't use a bald eagle because that's against the house rules. 'No captivity or harm done to bald eagles' -Rule #2). 

Anyways, the states then ran to the middle of the basement and pushed aside a mattress made out of KFC chicken boxes. Underneath the mattress was a trapped door, of which South Carolina yanked open to reveal the corn vault.

The states struggled to all jump in, but they managed and fell into the trapped door, landing on a bean bag the size of a semi truck.

Iowa then used the magical corn rope to shut the hatch, and then all was quiet.

Let's check up on Delaware.

He'd finished his ramen as he floated through space, and now he was bored... Very bored. Sitting in a giant empty... nothing is pretty boring, ya know? But anyway, he saw something strange; Another person was lost, floating through space.

"Quotation mark hello quotation mark," The person said.

"Why are you saying quotation mark?" Delaware asked. "Are you roleplaying? How long have you been out here? Are you insane? I went to college and studied therapy, so I could help. Then again I only studied it for two days before-"

Delaware kept ranting. You see, usually, he wasn't this talkative, but he's been alone so long, and he missed his siblings, that he was desperate for conversation, whether it was with a strange floating spaceman that talked in quotation marks or not.

"Quotation mark, haha, that funny lol, quotation mark," The person deadpanned.

Then the quotation mark guy, who I'll call ", started to turn angry.