It had been around a month before I was allowed to return to the dorms. I checked my reflection in the mirror pulling at the collar of my clothes to examine the hefty scar left on my shoulder.
"Damn Levi you really didn't want me to forget did you." I chuckled to myself scraping my hair into a ponytail and grabbed my bag.
"I'm going!" I called out as I trampled down the stairs.
"Safe travels darling" my father called out from his study as my mother rushed out of the kitchen and hugged me tight.
"Please stay safe y/n. I hate seeing you hurt." She whispered to me rubbing my back.
"I'll be fine I promise." I smiled pulling away and opened the door walking outside and out onto the street.
I'd packed light for my return so I made it the dorms relatively quickly. Part of the condition of my return to M.O.T.H.E.R was that I was to undertake my training once again and so I needed to attend several classes. I dropped my bag at my room before making my way to the classroom and sitting down.
It was embarrassing to sit amongst 10 year olds but it was necessary if I ever wanted to go back to Paradis.
The teacher entered the classroom causing any chatting to immediately silence. He strode across the room placing his brief case on the desk.
"Open your books to page 24. Today I will be talking to you about Ymir Fritz. Miss Braun?" The teacher walked over to a small feisty looking girl with unkept hair.
"Will your cousin be joining us today or had he gotten lost on his way to class again?"
"How should I know? I don't live with him." She responded in a snarky tone.
"Gabi, you should be nicer to your cousin...." A boy with blonde hair who sat next to her whispered
"Ah. Speak of a devil and they shall appear. Mr Braun, late again. Take a seat next to Miss...." He looked at me
"Uhh L/n sir." I replied quickly.
The teacher motioned to the seat next to me and Reiner walked over and sat down silently.
"To start today I want everyone to read over pages 24-27 and try to get to grips with it before you ask any questions or I tell you anything additional. You have 45 minutes." The teacher announced to the class.
"Hey. How come you're here too?" I whispered to Reiner. He didn't respond, and simply sat staring at the text book in front of him.
"Don't want to talk....okay then..."
"Miss L/n. In silence please." The teacher glared at me and I nodded burying my head in the text book too.
Something was off about Reiner. I couldn't tell what it was but he seemed almost as if he wasn't fully there. I didn't try to communicate with him for the rest of the class and instead focused on pretending like I didn't already know everything in the book from the first time around. Eventually class was over and it was time to leave.
The teacher collected his briefcase and dismissed the class. The kids all immediately rushed outside to go and play but Reiner and I took our time.
"Hey, Reiner, what's up with you today-" I touched his shoulder gently.
He turned to me his eyes wide tears bubbling in them
"H-how the hell did we get here.... Where's Commander Erwin??" He asked his voice trembling.
In that moment I saw the fragile boy I had comforted at 15 years old all over again.
"Reiner...I don't understand what you mean... You're home. Commander Erwin..is the enemy..."
"W-what are you talking about?! Don't you love him?! Everyone says you do! Why would-" I covered his mouth with my hand. I spied Bertholdt outside perched on a wall waiting for Reiner to come out.
"Keep it down. It's okay. I'll help you understand what's going on okay? Let's just go outside first." I wasn't sure what was going on but maybe Bertholdt had some answers.
We wandered outside to where Bertholdt was sat waiting.
"Berty, somethings wrong with him. I think he might be sick or something." I said trying not to sound panicked.
Bertholdt rolled his eyes in slight annoyance.
" Reiner. You're the Armoured Titan remember? This is our home and we want to destroy Paradis."
"No....no I could never...", Reiner looked
down at his own hands and then back up towards the sky. He took a breath before looking back towards us his eyes locking with mine. "Right. Yeah. I know that." In that moment every ounce of emotion faded from his hazel eyes. Like it had been sucked out by what Bertholdt had said.
I wrapped my arms around him hugging him, although he was far too broad for me to do it properly anymore.
"Reiner, is everything okay with you?" I asked hesitantly.
"Yeah why wouldn't it be? What? Do you think im stupid or something!?" He replied harshly pushing away from my hug and turning to walk away. I was dumbfounded. He was acting so out of character. Sure, he wasn't always the most friendly but he'd never spoken to me like that before.
I was too stunned to speak as he walked out of the compound. Bertholdt shot me an apologetic look before jogging after him.
'What the hell?' I thought to myself as I shook my head in disbelief. Something was definatley very wrong here and it didn't seem like this was too out of the ordinary considering how Bertholdt had acted when we came out.
I hoped this wasn't because of his Titan abilities. If he ended out like Zeke I wasn't sure what I'd ever do. He was like a brother to me after all. How could we stay close if he treats everyone like dirt with his mood swings.
Forget going to class this afternoon I needed to figure out what was happening here.I pulled my notebook from my pocket to check my schedule for classes and when I pulled it out a slip of paper came too.
Dearest y/n,
I've gone out to get lunch with an old friend. I'll be back in an hour or two.
Stay out of trouble,
Love
Erwin.
My heart stopped. I stared at it remembering the day he'd left it. It wasn't long before I'd fled and I must have put it into the pocket of these trousers back then. I was glad they hadn't gone through the wash yet. Dammit I really didn't need to be thinking about him right now, especially not here. I looked around and seeing some of McGath's men a little way off I placed it back in my pocket and made my way hastily out if the courtyard and hurried back to my dorm.
Once inside I closed the door and leant against it pulling the note from my pocket once again. I clutched it close to me sliding down the door into a sitting position my knees pulled up to my chest.
"I miss you..." My voice wobbled as I continued to hold it my head resting on my knees. "I wish I could ask you what to do right now. You always seem to have the answers to everything."
YOU ARE READING
Commander, Soldier, Spy (Erwin X Reader)
Romance(#1- Erwin (1st Dec 2021!) When forced to choose between new found love or life long duty, how can you be sure the one you choose is right? Erwin Smith is the commander of the survey corps and the many losses in his life have made him fearful of lov...
