Love To Remember

How To Love

Jordyn POV -

Ever since that night, Chris and I have become best friends. It became way easier to open up to him about stuff and not feel weak, foolish or feeble minded about it. Now a year has passed and we're sophomores in highschool.
Being with Chris it feels like time flew by. He's just fun to be around. He makes me forget about everything that's wrong in my life, like as if the pain of my past never existed. My heart was broken and I lost most the pieces to it; but instead of finding the missing parts and putting them back together with band-aides and scotch tape, he mended all the wounds and replaced my missing pieces with pieces of his own. I was literally lost, broken, and caged up. But he found me, loosened the chains and shackles, and because my heart had so many cracks in it he just gave me a new one.
I was happy to oblige to his 1% Superman rule, but now it seems as though I didn't even need it. He makes me so happy sometimes I wonder why I would ever cry again with him by my side.

"I'm sorry. You alright ma'?"

I was so caught up in my thoughts that I hadn't even realized that I was on the floor.

"Here, let me help you up."

There was a dark brown hand that outstretched in front of me. I grabbed it and he pulled me to my feet.

"You good?"
He asked me as I was still wondering what the hell happened.

Jordyn: Yeah, I'm fine.

"Yeah, you are..."

I looked up at him with curious eyes.

"Uhh, I'm Omari."

Omari? He's cute...

Jordyn: Jordyn.

Omari: Jordyn?

Jordyn: That's my name.

Omari: Oh... You look super familiar. Where do I know you from?

Jordyn: Well I've been going to this school for 2 years now, sooo...

Omari: Nah, you can't just be another face in the crowd.

Jordyn: Well... I am so.... Look, I have to get to class.

I said trying to spare the awkwardness of this meeting.

"Yo, Jordyn!!"

I heard a familiar voice call out.

"You seen Dreux? I been looking for his ass all day."

De asked out of breath as if he'd been running.

Jordyn: He left school like a hour ago.

De: Where he go?

I looked at him like he was crazy and shrugged my shoulders. He smacked his lips together and rolled his eyes at me.

De: You ain't never no help.

Jordyn: You're never any help. That's like a triple negative, De. Get your grammar together.

He let out a deep breath and pushed past me making me stumble back.

De: What's up O.

He said directing to Omari and walking away.

Omari: Should I have done something when he pushed you like that? I don't fuck with abuse.

I gave him a crazy, confused look.

Jordyn: Yeah, me either.
I said slowly.

Jordyn: That's my brother.

The look on his face was priceless.

Omari: De?!

He asked surprised.
I nodded.

Omari: Like blood?

Jordyn: We came out the same vagina. Why is this such a surprise to you!

Omari: That's my nigga. I been knowing him for years. I been to the crib a couple times and everything and never saw you...

Because I'm either in my room or at Chris' house.

Omari: He ain't even tell me he had a sister.

Jordyn: Because that's really none of your business.

I felt myself say with a kind of attitude.

Omari: Damn.

I guess he felt it. Even though I've opened up to Chris and I'm somewhat a happy camper again, stuff still hasn't really aired out between De and I. We'd have our moments when we're cool but we're still not as close and its still hard for me to open up to him like I used to. He used to try but now I guess he gave up on trying to get close to me again. I honestly don't think we'll ever have the same relationship as we did before. We're close and we're cool, but I just can't trust in him like I used to; and I don't know why.

Jordyn: Sorry about that. But it's a brother-sister thing. Don't take it personal. But I really do have to go.

I said as I began to walk away.

Omari: Nah I understand. I'll see you around.

He said as I already started to walk away. Thinking about me and De's current relationship saddens me. Sometimes I really miss my brother and the things we used to share. I wish we could go back to that warm happy feeling we always had when we were with each other.

"Never let go. Never give up on each other. Because in the end, when push comes to shove, love is all you have." 

That's what our mom used to tell us whenever we got into an argument.
For a moment I actually believed her. But where was De when I needed him? He left me... And I was alone... And now he's still gone; too busy hanging out with Dreux and their punk ass boy band.

And it always comes back and slaps me in the face. Why can't we just go back to the beginning? Back to when the earth, the sun, the stars all aligned. My heart began beating fast and I felt my face turn hot. My vision blurred as I tried to fight the tears from falling. I miss my old life. I can't keep living like this. I hate this. It looks like I'm over it on the outside but behind close doors I always break down.

I was looking down as I was walking and it felt as if I ran into a brick wall.

"Jordyn."

His voice was like music to my ears.

Chris: What's wrong?

I couldn't speak. All I could do was shake my head.

Chris: Come on. Let's go home.

Jordyn: I still have a class.

Chris: Yeah, so do I. But you need me right now.

Chris wiped the tears from my face and grabbed my hand, leading me to a back hallway where there was an secret exit with no security cameras.
He walked me to my house and tucked me in my bed ensuring that I was ok.

Jordyn: Chris ...

He began walking out my door but when I called him he turned back my towards me.

Jordyn: Can you stay with me? I mean I'm pretty much cried out so I'll be asleep soon... But I don't really wanna be alone.

Chris: Yeah.

Chris POV -

I began walking back over to the bed as she lifted up the blankets so I could get under with her. As soon as I got comfortable she moved closer to me and rested her head on my chest. I didn't really trip off her asking me to lay with her, but as soon as I felt her touch and her body being so close to mine it was like heaven on earth. I immediately wrapped my arms around her holding her as tight as I could without hurting her. I felt so close to her, but yet so far away.