like never before | beomkai

12 | old habits

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Monday rolls and Kai's schedule is planned every minute of it.

He didn't see Beomgyu the whole day, nor did he see Yeonjun; but Soobin and Taehyun were the ones he shared a table with at lunch. 40 minutes—because he had algebra next and he needs to study for at least 20 minutes.

Taehyun was upset when Kai's alarm blasted, still against all the scheduling stuff Kai brought to himself. Soobin on the other hand was just fascinated. "Was he like this before?" He asked when Kai zoomed out of the Cafeteria. It was answered with a tired nod.

The irony to it all was the fact that Kai started scheduling all because of Beomgyu in high school. He was so determined to never cross paths with the older one again that he made sure to spend most of his time in places Beomgyu and the others rarely go to on campus.

Now, he had no purpose. Scheduling was only meant to ease his anxiety of living—and he knows it's flawed as hell! It's not like the cafe where he had a fixed job of taking orders and payment. Taehyun was right about things not going to plan, but Kai chose to cling onto futile things to feel in control.

After Kai's last lecture, he bumped into Yeonjun and Soobin.

"Kai!" Yeonjun, as usual, acted like it's been years since they last saw each other. He pulled the younger one in a hug, to which Soobin cooed when Kai bent down to fit into Yeonjun's arms.

"Hi! I'm on my way to the library. How about you?"

Soobin pouts. "We're heading to the cafe. My mom allowed us to study there whenever we like. You should join us."

"Oh, I will. But maybe next week?"

"That's fine. Say hello to Beomgyu for me when you see him in the library, cutie," Soobin ruffled Kai's hair and the younger one pretends be was annoyed. Soobin was always affectionate, he's used to it by now.

"Bye-bye," Yeonjun blew him a kiss goodbye.

Kai forgot to ask about what Soobin meant about Beomgyu, but all answers were laid before him when he arrived in the library's break room a few minutes later. Beomgyu was with the same girl from last time, and Kai wasn't so surprised to see the two playfully stepping on each other's foot as they sat side by side.

"Kai!" Beomgyu was glad to see him.

Kai was mostly having a tummy ache from the lunch he had from earlier. "Hyung."

He didn't miss the way Beomgyu tapped the girl's arm before approaching him, as if asking for permission. Ugh. I knew the stew from earlier was suspicious!

"Is everything alright?" Beomgyu asked, noticing the restless look on his friend's face.

"I'm fine, hyung," Kai tried his best to smile. He could only spare a few minutes more in the break room and he's not even near the vending machine yet. "Just getting something to drink."

"Let me get it for you."

"It's okay. I can do it myself," Kai successfully got himself the purple drink. "Soobin hyung and Yeonjun hyung said hi."

"They're in the cafe?"

"Studying there, yeah. I'll join them next week."

"Oh, okay. See you later, Hyuka."

Beomgyu runs back to the girl, and Kai walks out of the break room. Maybe he's a bit disappointed that Beomgyu didn't introduce the girl to him like it's a little secret.

His tummy ache didn't make studying easy for the whole afternoon.

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So maybe it's not the stew from the cafeteria after all, because it lasted the entire week.

In the comfort of his home, on the kitchen counter, he wrote in his journal with handwriting that was more messy than usual. His father was nearby, cooking for dinner. "How's university?"

"Nothing much. I have an essay due in three days, but it's pretty much an editorial."

"Any girlfriends?"

Kai slammed his face on the table. "I'm not liking where this is going."

"Boyfriends?"

"Boyfriends?" Kai propped his arms on the table to let his chin fall on the soft skin. "If I do, is that fine?"

A holler echoed throughout the room. Kai knew he got the loud laughter from his father, but he didn't know that he'd be coming out like this. He was expecting crying, lots of degrading—well, maybe not that. His dad is an absolute sweetheart, but you get the gist of what Kai had expected.

His father was just snickering while tossing food on the heated pan. "Kai, I would be a terrible father if I didn't notice your crush on that one friend of yours. He seems like a good child. Very much deserving of all the heart eyes you shoot him."

"I don't like Beomgyu hyung like that," Kai hid his flushed face.

"I never mentioned a name, but he's the first person you thought of?"

Kai groaned in frustration. Whatever. His father was just finding holes to everything he said, probing for years worth teasing material.