The Gifted's (COMPLETED)

CHAPTER 31

Chapter 31:
Cure

Do you ever feel dead but still breathing? Do you ever wish to stop time for a minute just to make a difference? Do you ever feel unworthy to be happy?

Because to me, it's a yes. I experience all of it. And I feel nothing but cursed. I feel like the world is against any of my wishes and tears down my hopes and makes me experience hell instead.

This is why I hate being so happy. Dahil sa oras na naging sobrang saya ko na, nawawala bigla lahat sakin na parang bula.

Am I undeserving? Is all of my sacrifices and the pain I felt all these years not enough to get the happiness I deserve? When will be my turn to be truly happy?

When will I get my happy ending?

"Tashna, you need to eat. It's dinner already".

Ang boses ni Bria ang tanging nagbigay buhay sa tahimik kong kwarto. I never left this room since that day...since that day I lost one of the main reason why should I stay alive.

Hindi ko nga alam kung bakit pa'ko buhay hanggang ngayon. I should be dead too.

"You still didn't eat for exactly two days, Tash. You're gonna starve yourself. It's not—".

"I'm fine". I cut her off.

Nanatili ang mga mata ko sa labas ng bintana. "I just need to be alone".

Silence filled the whole room for a moment. Lumingon ako sa kanya at nakita syang umiiyak. Pero wala akong naramdaman.

I never felt guilty or worried about her, crying, in front of me. I just stared at her with my blank expression. I have nothing to react to, anyway. I'm numb. How pathetic.

"You don't need to punish yourself... It's not your fault... Wala kang kasalanan sa nangyari, Tash, please... Don't do this.. hindi din nya ito magugustuhan, you know that the most..". She said, almost pleading.

Nanatili ang tingin ko sa kanya at hindi nagsalita. Lumakad sya papunta sakin pero umiling ako. I don't need any physical touch or even words of wisdom right now.

I don't want to feel being pitied. Mas lalo lamang bumibigat ang nararamdaman ko.

"You can now leave, Bria". Malamig kong saad sa kanya bago inalis ang mga mata sa kanya at nilipat muli sa labas ng bintana. Kung saan natatanaw ko ngayon ang papalubog na araw.

Sunset symbolizes ending, they say.

I used to love it. Pero hindi na ngayon.

"I understand". Her voice cracked.

"Pero sana man lang ay kumain ka. Your body badly needs it". She said before I heard the door close.

Pinagdikit ko ang aking tuhod at pinatong doon ang ulo habang walang buhay kong pinapanood ang pagkawala ng haring araw at pagpalit naman ng maliwanag na buwan.

The glimpse of light from the moon shines on half of my face. I closed my eyes and a flash of the memories from that day appeared again. I smiled bitterly.

Pangungulila ang isa sa mga pinakamabigat na nararamdaman ko ngayon pero mas nanaig ang galit at pagkamuhi. Hindi ko makakalimutan ang mga sandali bago tumarak sa kanya ang punyal na 'yon.

I'll never forget the moment that shattered every piece of my heart that he completed. The fear that I felt that day crawled in every part of my body that killed me. Hinding hindi ko makakalimutan ang kinuha nya sakin....

"Anak...".

Kumuyom ang mga kamay ko. Hindi ako gumalaw sa posisyon ko at nanatiling tahimik.

"You haven't eaten for two days straight. It's not healthy. Your body needs food to gain energy, Tashna. Hindi ka makakapagpatuloy kung ganito ang gagawin mo. You'll end dying too".