Random encounters

28. Choices

Unedited.

finally gets real, our first fight. We've been trying so hard not to fight but I think it was bound to happen.
"So what now?" I ask sitted on the bed, he's standing by the window. We're both not looking at each other.
"I don't know..." he answers
There's silence.
I think I should go, I'll request a bolt" I say
He doesn't turn, I will just request a ride back to my place. It says 10 minutes, I'll pack up my things before it arrives.
"I don't want you to go..." he says now sitting on the bed
I won't entertain this, especially when my ride is almost here and I'm done packing. Well not everything but some of it.
"Can we please talk..." he says
"No Luke, I asked what now and you said you..."
"I know what I said" he cuts me out
"My ride is a minute away, and we've talked about this." I zip my bag
"You fight Wanga, when we talk. You don't listen to me." He answers calmly
"I'm listening now..." my phone rings
It's my ride.
"I'm going." I pick up my bag and head outside.

It's been two weeks since I left him and I have nothing from him, even a text. At first I thought he'd come, he didn't. Then he never called and I felt stupid because I couldn't put my phone down. So tonight I shutdown my mind and followed my heart,  I miss him so much, I want us to talk. I open the door and close it, he's standing by the the stairs staring at me as I walk towards him. I thought he'd still be at work or out, that way he'll be the one finding me here waiting.
"I didn't think you'd be back, I used my keys that's why I didn't tell you I was coming..." I break the silence but not the staring contest
"It's okay." He's still not smiling
"So what now Luke? You had a long time to process everything alone, I'm sure you made a decision..." I say
"I want you Wanga..."
"Babe, I'm done we can go..." I know her, how can I not. She's the same lady from the lingerie store, the one who disregarded me. She's wearing Luke's shirt, biker tight and Nike airforce 1.
She scans me as she make way to Luke, wraps her arms around his neck and kiss him but he turn away.
"Ellie, this is Wanga..." he frees himself from her then she face me, with the same face as the last time.
"What is she doing here?" Her
Did she just ask what I'm doing here? I can feel myself losing it little by little.
"Ellie..." Luke
"She's right, I shouldn't be here. How naive was I to think you'll be here alone all this time, to think you're different..." I stop because he's looking at me
"So you came here to fight?" Luke asks
"Whatever, it doesn't matter anymore. You hurt me, I owe you no explanation whatsoever." I turn and walk to the door then walk out.
I'm really angry, I feel so stupid that he had the audacity to ask me if I came here to fight. As if I didn't find him with another woman in his house. He grabs my hand and pull me back to him.
"You slept with her, not only that but brought her here why? If you wanted nothing to do with me after everything you should've just said so, instead of being mute  knowing you've made your decision..." I say
He doesn't say anything but look at me.
"I'm so stupid, I should've seen this coming. You wanted what you couldn't have, what your friend had. That's why I was different for you but now you've got your own taste..."
"That's enough" he says shutting me off
"Why did you sleep with her? Is she the only one? Actually how many?" I ask
"You're too emotional, we can talk about this when you have cooled down..." he says still calm
"Or never, I'm okay with that. After all, she's still in there and I'm here." I walk to my car then open the door.
"I'm not good at this" he says closing the door before I can even get in.
"Okay Luke..." I say looking at him
"Can we please talk about this inside..." he asks
"She's in there, I'm leaving. I don't want to fight with you anymore..." I say
"You just said the worst things to me about a situation you took less than 2 minutes to access. Ever since you got here, you've been on attack mode trying to pick a fight." He stops.
"You just rolled your eyes at me..." he state
Yes I did but I didn't think he'd notice that or even make a big deal out of it.
"You just fucked your ex, I'm done with this..." I say
"Okay. I'm not going to run after you forever I told you that. But I'm sorry for hurting you this way, I didn't have sex with her after you left, but yes she's pregnant with my baby. I lied and kept it from you because at that time we just started and I waited for you. Losing you when I just got you wasn't part of the plan. I still don't plan on letting you go." He exhale
"I love you so much, you don't know..." him
"Then why did you cheat..." I ask now emotional
"Because I've never done this before, I've never had this before so I don't know what to do or say to make it work. A lot of people don't believe in us, some waited for this to happen and I think I was one of those people who didn't believe in us. I'm so sorry for hurting you Wanga, I don't blame you if you want to leave but I want you to know that I love you still and I'll always do."  He says
"I can't give you a child..." that's me being myself, an emotional wreck
"She's able to give you something I was never going to give you Luke. I know you won't say it but at some point its a good thing..."
"Wanga, stop. I was never going to say it because it doesn't matter. I want you..." he says
"You don't mean that..." I say
He exhales. "Okay"
"I'll come and pick up the rest of my stuff, I'll let you know when I do." I say after a minute of silence
He doesn't say anything but look at me. It's weird that I still want him even after he cheated on me, it's not sexual but me wanting him to hold me close and kiss my cheeks when I make him laugh.
I have nothing more to say, so I walk to my car and drive. He stared at me as I drive away from him but didn't move an inch. I'm so emotional that I resent him for doing the same thing Thiko did to me in the past. Knowing that Candy was right and everyone was right to doubt us. Denzhe is with Thiko so I'm all alone, I hate myself for being in this position. I had all the time in the world to leave Thiko but I didn't, I had many job offers but I decided to be a housewife. I don't know where to start or if I've run out of time.