Still With My Memories

59. Through the Night

Jungkook POV

The smell of alcohol still reeked inside the red room that became my comfort zone. An escape place where I can be honest; where I can be vulnerable and weak without thinking of anything.

The room filled with stranger's faces and preserved memories still mesmerized me. "Did I really captured all of this?" I mumbled to no one with my head leaning on the wall feeling nothing but emptiness. Since I started this facade, I always had this huge hole in my heart that I tried to fill with fake arrogance and alcohol.

I can't even remember when did I started liking the feeling of being drowned with several bottles of beer. All that I know is that I am afraid of nightmares and alcohol had been my medicine.

As I sat on the floor with my head filled with nothing but his disappointed and raging gaze, I can't help but think that a nightmare will probably visit again.

I heaved a sigh before I jugged the third bottle of beer. "Jeez. I didn't know Jimin could be a boxer." I chuckled as I massaged the part that he punched. It left a bruised on my nose bridge but I knew I deserved this.

"If only I could say sorry. I would do it for a million times, Jimin ah."

But I can't.

-Flashback-

"H-Hyung... I'm really glad you've found us." I told my brother as I walked him around the forest. Jimin fell asleep after crying so much. So I walked with him before they left as Jin did not allow their stay. The giggly officer was left with the other member chatting, as if he became a resident in just minutes of stay.

It was like a miracle that they were able to found us with the help of one of the members who happened to save us as well.

I am happy.

I truly am.

But there was lingering pain as well.

I knew there's something going on between and him and Jimin and if my guess is right, hyung is probably Jimin's first love.

The man I am most jealous of.

I felt nervous to open up the topic but I should know, right? I'm also thinking of letting him know about our relationship.

"Oh you don't have any idea... I almost got mad looking for the two of you." He chuckled before we sat down under the huge tree shading the grassy ground.

"Yeah... I was about to ask that. How did you know Jimin?" I asked feeling my nails slowly digging on my palm. I was so nervous. Though, I might already know the answer I still wanna hear it.

"J-Jimin?" He paused and let out a shy and gauche smile. "H-how can I even say this?" He uttered and I saw a how his cheeks slowly flushed red followed with his manly giggles.

"He is... Probably the reason why I'm here."

"What?" I asked not realizing my angered tone. Hyung was suddenly in defense as he aggressively waved his hand in front of my face.

"Oh no, my handsome young brother! I-I came here for you too!" He said and grapple my neck. I remember it was our way of soothing each other's heightening emotions but that moment I felt rather anxious. As for my brother, he might be thinking I was just jealous of Jimin.

Right, he knew nothing.

I should tell him.

I supposed to start talking when I suddenly felt a drip of warm water fallen in my hand. I thought it was raining but when I looked up at Taehyung, I realized it was from him.