True Love

Pain of Losing Someone

Demelza was inconsolable her dear mother in pain and she wasn't with her when she died, she ran to the beach . She stumbled as she ran, her tears not allowing her to see. Jenny had looked out the window as she finished dinner. She said excuse me Master Joshua but I think the Mistress is in distress. Both Joshua and Ross looked up, Joshua said, "why what happened?"
Jenny told him of Demelza telling her she had plans for this evening and would not be eating with them, but then she got a letter and went out behind the barns. Just now she was running to the cliffs it looked like she be crying and she kept stumbling. Joshua jumped up and went toward the door, Ross was right behind him. It didn't take them long to find her kneeling at the edge of the water wailing. They ran down to where she was and noticed the letter clutched to her chest. Joshua pulled her into his chest and dislodged the letter and handed it to Ross.
Ross read and realized that this young girl just lost the one person that until she came to Nampara had showed her love. He handed the letter to Joshua picking up the still weeping girl and carried her back to the house. Joshua followed, when they entered the house they asked Jenny to see the Mistress, and assist her in her night rails for bed. Ross sat down with Jim none of them wishing to eat. Finally the house was silent. When Jenny came out she said "I take it something happened to the maids mother?" Joshua nodded and said, "she passed away". Jenny clutched her chest and said "oh poor maid."
Joshua got up from the table and said, "he was going to sit with Demelza." Ross ate a small portion of pork and some apple rings, although he had two helping of the apple pie. Apple pie was his favorite and he told Jenny they were the best he had ever eaten. Jenny told him "Demelza cooked everything from her mothers recipes that she memorized. I don't know what to do to help Demelza with her hurt?" Ross went for a walk along the beach and thought of the song she sung last evening with her sweet voice. He thought of her father and wondered how a man could treat a woman that bore his children and his daughter that way? Then he thought how he grabbed her and called her nothing but a miners brat! He should be horse whipped she didn't deserve his anger!
When he got back to Nampara he knocked on Demelza's door. He heard someone walking, then his father was standing there. "Dad why don't you go to bed I'll sit with her Joshua said, "I think she is having nightmares she keeps thrashing in her sleep have you heard anything from that doctor friend of yours?" "I don't want to call on Choak," Ross responded, "I would not let you call him. He'd bleed her for sure. I will send another letter tomorrow. Go get some rest father I will sit here with her!"
Ross fell asleep he was dreaming of a voice of a siren singing a mournful song of the ebbing and flooding of tides. He felt something nudging his leg he woke to find Garrick, then he heard faint whimpering and saw Demelza thrashing in her sleep all at once she sprang up screaming, "NO FATHER NO!" Ross went to her side and wrapped his arms around her, "shh shh it is alright, it is alright!" Demelza started hyperventilating. Ross said, "come on Demelza breathe, deep breath in release!" Demelza said, "it was father dumping the the water on me again then hitting my mother when she screamed for him to stop!" She was crying again and Ross hugged her and rocked her back and forth. He laid her down trying to get her to go back to sleep. She said, "would you lay beside me please just until I go to sleep." He tucked her in and laid on top of the covers he put her hand on his chest as he held her in his arms as he held her all night. His father woke him in the morning, he disengaged himself gently from Demelza so not to wake her. He followed his father out of her room. Ross said, "she was having a nightmare and woke up remembering her father pouring scalding water on her and her mother getting a beating for screaming at him to stop!" Joshua nodded. "I have an appointment today father can you stay with Demelza?" His father told Ross, "do what you need to do," then they went and got breakfast.
Demelza woke a little while later she washed and tied her hair up in a ribbon. She went to the kitchen and saw Joshua there but not Ross. She asked, "Joshua can we go riding today?" He told her "that sounds like an excellent idea." She said, "could we go to Aunt Graces grave since I can't go to Momma's maybe I good lay something there for her!" Joshua said, "my dear I am sorry for your loss, but she is in a much better place then we now!" A tear slip from her eye as she nodded her head. She went to the garden wall where she found some prim roses already blooming to lay on the grave. They saddled their horses and visited Graces and Claude's grave. Demelza took some of the flower's and place the smaller of the two on Claude's and the larger on Graces. She said, "please Aunt Grace take care of my mother for me, I will try to make her proud and I hope she is at peace." She put her fingers to her lips kissed them then placed them on the stone. After a few minutes they left the church yard.
They rode toward the beach when they were near the miners steps they saw two horses and recognized one as Ross's stallion Joshua thinking his son, was on a mission of some sort continued on. When they got closer to the horses, Demelza realized who the other horse belonged to. She said, "Joshua let's go up top maybe he is up there!" Joshua said, "he wouldn't leave Darkey here." He yelled for Ross about five times when Ross came out of the cave putting his waists coat back on! His father said, "what are you doing in there boy and whose horse is this?" Ross said, "just exploring Dad!" Demelza was hurt because he would give Elizabeth the time of day after she cheated on him, but he considered her as being unworthy calling her a miners brat. She looked at him and said, "where is Elizabeth" Ross looked at her and realized she knew the horse, although she didn't say it in a hateful manner. Joshua raised his eyebrows and said, "come Demelza I don't think this is a proper place for a lady to be!" He turned his horse and Demelza followed she didn't look back because if she did she was sure she couldn't hide her hated from him any longer.
Elizabeth came out of the cave and said, "did that miners brat just tell your father I was here?" Ross said, "yes your horse was here." He said "what does it matter if anyone finds out if Francis doesn't want you, I will marry you and give his child a name?" Elizabeth said, "Ross that is impossible the scandals alone it is not what is done in polite society. I am to be Mistress of Twenwith you know I could never be happy being Mistress of Nampara. This is just scratching the itch we have for each other the physical attraction was always there and I suppose it always will be!" Ross thought this is not the same sweet person I believed I was in love with! He asked her, "Elizabeth are you suggesting we have a secret affair?" She said, "I am not against such a thing Ross. If it does not matter to me it should not matter to you!" Ross backed away from her, "IT DOES MATTER TO ME, IT WOULD BE MY COUSIN WE WOULD BE BETRAYING"! "Oh come Ross did Francis feel that way when we became lovers? Turn about is fair play is it not?" Ross shook his head and said, "you should go Elizabeth and from this moment on we are nothing but former friends." He waited until she was on her horse and left then he headed home. When he got there Joshua and Demelza was still not home, he asked Jenny, "what they were up to?" She said, "that Mistress Demelza wanted to go to his mothers grave to place flowers, since she couldn't placed them at her own, then they were going to ride along the beach and maybe take the boat out to do some fishing". He said, "we're they to be back for lunch?" She said,
"I don't think so, master Joshua had her pack some cheese grapes, and some jam along with Lemonade."
They were actually on Damsel Point eating watching the ocean! Demelza said, "I am sorry Master Joshua I should not of mentioned Elizabeth, that was a mean and spiteful thing for me to do!" Joshua said, "nonsense girl, why would it be spiteful?" She told him, "she said rude things the one day she came and then when Master Ross said, I was nothing more then a miners brat!" She let her sentence drop. "My son is a typical dark Poldark he is not always the most level headed person, I fear he is in for a world of heartbreak if he does not let the past go. Some of that is my fault I never taught him the correct way to treat women and he does not always take their feelings or their personalities into account. The perfect example is Elizabeth she is just like her mother but she does not care for anyone besides herself and her social status. She would not of stayed true to Ross because she is always needing to be the most admired and most desired women at anytime! She is due to marry my nephew in two weeks and she is meeting up with Ross! God if that does not tell him what type of woman she is there is no hope for him."
"May I ask a favor of you" Demelza questioned? "Depends," Joshua said with a laugh. "I want to eat on the kitchen with Jenny and Jim!" "Absolutely not" yelled Joshua. Demelza tried to reason with him. "How can I sit at a table with him knowing how he detest me. I will never be anything more then a miners brat forced upon your family don't you see"! Joshua grabbed her hands "my Grace would not have left me or our sons treat you like you are not good enough and if the boy feels that way it is his problem not yours. Now I have some thing I would like to give you it was a ring I got for Grace when Claud was born. It is aquamarine and it is to remind you of your mother. I know your Aunt would want you to have it!" She hugged Joshua and thanked him as she cried again for the lost of her mother.
It was late afternoon when they got back. Upon entering the house Demelza realize she had been letting the chores slip the furniture was dusty and the floors needed swept and scrubbed and she realized the laundry needed done to. She had left the cooking up to Jenny today. She set the table and placed herself furthest away from Ross.
The meal was editable but lack the flavor that Demelza had infused into the meals. There was still pies and spiced apple rings so they were put on the table with a stew that Jenny had made. Joshua had asked Jim how the fields were coming along and asked if they were beginning to plow for planting? Ross realizing Demelza wasn't very talkative asked if she would like to go fishing tomorrow? She shook her head and said, "there was much that needed done tomorrow!" Ross said, "oh like what?" She said, "the furniture was quit dusty, the windows needed good scrub, the laundry needed done, the floors needed sweep and scrubbed. Joshua looked at Jenny and said, "do you think we need more help in the house Jenny"? Jenny not wanting them to think she was inadequate said that her and Demelza could handle it. Joshua then looked at Demelza and smiled and said, "Demelza is not an employee she is Mistress not a servant!" Jenny blushed and Demelza put her hand on Jenny's and said, "Jenny and I work well together!"1
Joshua then turned the conversation to Francis's and Elizabeth's wedding. He looked at Ross and said, "is there still to be a wedding in two weeks?" Ross said, "I knew of no alterations of plans!" Then Joshua said, "we have to respond of whether we will attend or not?" "I have to attend or Charles will be insufferable what about you boy?" Ross said, "I guess if I do not it will look like sour grapes." "How about you Demelza," she shook her head. "My name was not on the invitation and I don't think Elizabeth would be pleased that I am in attendance!" Joshua said, "well if my ward is not welcome neither am I. I will ask for confirmation before I accept." Ross said, "I already told them that if Demelza isn't invited we would not attend!" Demelza slammed down her napkin and said, "they are your relatives not mine. I am nothing more then a miners brat I do not want to attend!" She went to the kitchen and started to get the plates and the pies for desert. Joshua sat there and raised his eyebrows at Ross! Demelza came back in with the pies. Jenny spoke up and said, "we were wondering if we could have the reception here in the barn for our wedding it is in one weeks time, my family will take care of everything. Demelza I would be grateful if you would stand for me?" Demelza told her, "would be honored!"