Ill Met By Moonlight

Chapter 51: Depression

Lex stayed completely still despite her body jerking and forcing her to try to move. She kept her feet nailed to the ground as Miranda's claws got closer and closer. A loud shriek from Donna erupted in the air as Miranda's golden talons plunged deep into Lex's abdomen, going right through her. When the blonde tried to pull away, Lex grabbed her shoulders, coughing out a glob of blood.

Miranda yanked her arm out of Lex's abdomen, her entire forearm caked in blood and a splatter of blood on her cheek. It was a struggle for Lex to stay on her feet due to the new hole in her abdomen as it started to heal. The blonde priestess struggled to escape the woman's grasp.

Her struggling came to a stop when Lex yanked the priestess towards her, wrapping her arms around the woman in a tight embrace. Everyone stared at the scene. They were all in complete shock, unable to fathom what was happening. Even Miranda couldn't believe what was happening.

After her shock subsided, the blonde continued to struggle once more. She violently thrashed about, trying to get Lex to release her. But the snowy haired woman didn't budge. Miranda stared clawing at her back. Blood seeped from the wounds on Lex's back, staining her already bloody tank top even more.

''Let! Me! Go!'' the blonde screamed in her ear. But even that didn't seem to effect Lex. The priestess trashed with all her might, digging her claws deeper into Lex's back; staining her golden talons crimson red. ''Let me go you bitch!''

''No, I'm not letting you go.'' Lex said. Her voice was still calm despite everything Miranda had done and said in their fight. It was agonizing to her. It strangely hurt more than being cut, shot or stabbed.

''Get off of me! Let go!'' she screamed, her actions becoming weaker and weaker, her breath hitching. ''I hate you, Miroslava! I-I hate you! I h-hate you!''

Eventually, Miranda legs gave out and she collapsed against Lex's torso. The blonde couldn't help but cry out, sobbing uncontrollably. 

''Why are y-you like this?! S-Stop being l-like t-this! I hate you!'' Miranda shouted, starting to hit the woman as hard as she could, but Lex still wouldn't let go. 

Eventually, the two of them slumped the the ground and only when they were both on the ground, Lex released Miranda. But the woman didn't pulled away like she had been trying to do. Instead, she grabbed onto Lex's tank top, burying her face into the woman's shoulder, unable to stop crying. Lex just held the woman as her wounds healed, gently petting her golden coloured hair that was now messy and fell in front of her face due to the fight.

Lex looked over at each of the Lords, silently telling them not to come closer just yet. Each of the Lords faces were ones of surprised-sadness. None of them had ever heard or seen Miranda cry like this before. Actually, Lex was convinced that none of them had ever seen Miranda cry  before.

The snowy haired woman turned back to Miranda, allowing the woman to cry. From the sounds of it, she really needed it. It made Lex's own well up with tears. Miranda's cries reminded Lex of the tears she would shed every morning and night after her sister's death.

***

Lex struggled to sleep, but it just seemed impossible. It had been a month since... since Alexis...

She rolled onto her side, not wanting to think of it. But her mind always wondered back to that horrible day. The day she found her sister face down on the shoreline of the lake.

The woman rolled onto her back, grabbing her thin pillow and placing it over her face quickly. She could hear her own pitiful, muffled weeping. She would have been screaming if she didn't press the pillow over her face.

After her breathing calmed down, she removed the pillow and slowly sat up, her back against the headboard. She brought her knees to her chest, gazing at the ruffled sheets on her bed. The light from the moon gave her room a pale blue glow to it. It would have been relaxing, if Alexis...

She shook her head, swinging her legs over the side of her bed, wrapping her blue scarf around her before getting up and stepping into the hallway. It was quiet tonight. Just like every other night before it. It felt so lonely. She felt so alone in this house.

Quietly, she stopped in front of Alexis's door. With a shaky hand, she opened the door. Everything was like it was when Alexis was alive. Her school work along the floor in organized piles. Her shelves were still lined with books and her bed sheets messy and twisted, half of her pillow hanging off the edge of her bed.

Lex's gaze was fixed on the bed as she slowly approached, gripping onto her scarf for support. She slowly lowered herself onto the bed, afraid she'd break it if she wasn't careful, which was foolish, but she still couldn't help but be afraid.

She couldn't help but stare at the bed, tears threatening to pour from her eyes. She took in a deep breath which proved to be a mistake. Alexis's scent invaded her sense of smell, her breath hitched violently and the tears started to flow.

She desperately tried to wipe them away but they wouldn't stop. Lex covered her mouth in an attempt to stifle her cries. She felt so alone now without Alexis... She felt so... empty. Like a hole in her soul. One that couldn't be filled.

''Why...'' she muttered, squeezing her eyes shut. ''Why did it have to happen to her?... She didn't deserve it!... It should have been me?! Why... why n-not m-me?...''

***

''Why did it have to take her?... my Eva... why did it have to be her?!...'' Miranda screamed into Lex's shoulder.

Lex didn't say anything. All she did was hold the woman, allowing her to cry as much as she needed to. 

''Why couldn't... it have been me?...'' Miranda whimpered. 

Lex finally spoke after staying silent for so long. ''I know it hurts, Miranda.''

''Why...'' the woman whimpered. Lex allowed the blonde woman to pull away from her. Tears were rolling down her cheeks, her eyes filled with so much bottled up pain.  ''Why are you doing this?... Why didn't you fight back?...''

''Because...'' Lex paused, staring into Miranda's sorrowful blue eyes. Her cheeks soaked with tears. ''When I look at you... I see myself. Parts of you remind me of myself. Your pain reminds me of the pain I felt when I lost Alexis. You anger reminds me of my own. You can't change the past, no matter how much it hurts. But you can't let it dictate your decisions.''

Miranda just stared at Lex for a moment before lowering her head. ''I just want my Eva back...''

Lex didn't say anything.

''I've work so long... done so much research... if I give up now it'll all be for nothing...'' Miranda used the back of her hand to wipe away her tears which were finally ceasing now that she was beginning to calm down. ''All those years wasted...''

''Miranda, you have to let her go. But the doesn't mean you have to forget her. But you can't stay like this. It's only hurting you, weighing you down, burning you out.'' Lex paused, her voice cracking a little. Almost as if she was trying to convince herself as well. ''Let her rest.''

Miranda took in deep, shaky breaths. ''If I let her go... I'll have no one... I'll be all alone again... I d-don't want to be a-a-alone...''