Electric Blue Rose - Book One. [COMPLETED] Undergoing Edits

Chapter Eighteen - Shame

Alex stayed the night lying beside her bed, reliving the nights at Solsper. Alex had no doubts. He wanted her, he was determined to help her through all the hardship, but this time, he caused it. Her eyes were swollen, her lip cut and arm returned to a sling. They used healing orbs on her burns, but the scars were like faded cuts all around her legs, on her arms, and one across her eye. The pain from all of it at once must've been overbearing. He couldn't keep his eyes on her without falling victim to silent tears of guilt. He wiped his face and turned around when he heard the door open. Joe came in with similar burn scars on his arms. He crossed over to her and ran his hand through her hair.

"I thought you loved her?" Joe said, glancing up at Alex. Alex met his gaze, not speaking. "I can't believe you didn't take two minutes to think about the repercussions of this article. The way they wrote it makes it seem like she should be on her knees thanking you for being with her. I feel like I don't even know you anymore."

"That's not fair, I-."

"This is not fair," Joe said, gesturing to Jade's condition. "You suffer with what your actions have caused. I always thought no one could be good enough to be with you, but now," Joe shook his head, "she deserves so much better." "I'm going to stay with her, and you shouldn't be the first person she sees when she wakes up. The doctors said she's expected to wake up soon-so go home."

Alex bowed his head shamefully. Grabbing his stuff, he returned to his room. Alex stopped when Edge passed him, paying no attention while carrying a basket of small white flowers. He sighed and crossed into the room. Alex wanted to go back and tell Joe off, to stop Edge, but Joe was right. After the damage he caused, Alex shouldn't be the one Jade sees first. Thoughts, guilt, fear, it all clouded his mind. He turned, seeing the magazine stack on his table. His assistant likely tended to them. Alex sighed, grabbing the one with the photo of her painting. She gasped from Alex's insult. He crossed a line that she never expected when he called her a whore for it. He closed his eyes, simmering in the pain of his words. How small he must've made her feel, how alone. Alex read through the articles, seeing Joe's point. Everything they wrote about her was lies; he encouraged her to feed them. All the remarks about her appearance, her remaining inferior to Arks, especially Alex: Alex let them talk to her like that. She held Alex on a pedestal, Jade told him she would do anything for him, and she had. She was afraid to give him a second chance, and now he confirmed her reasonings for being scared. He was slowly destroying the girl he claimed to love, and for what? He sighed and threw the magazines in the garbage. Alex jumped at the rapid knocking at his door. He took a deep breath and crossed to it, opening it. Amorio stormed in. Alex shut the door behind him and looked down, feeling the anger radiate off Amorio.

"You promised me. You promised me that you would watch over Jade. Then I find out you're the reason it happened. If I knew Jade would be okay without me, I would have my hands around that neck of yours, ready for whatever repercussions it provided. I don't understand it. Why did you bother getting back together with her if you don't care about her?"

"Of course, I care about her!"

"Really? You have a terrible way of showing it. My daughter makes her own decisions, but I hope she makes the right one by getting as far from you as possible. All those years away, I watched her write those letters. She'd smile so wide, conveying the small things that happened to her, the things that didn't hurt. She struggled the longer they went unanswered. She tried and tried to convince me that you had a reason. Jade had so many excuses lined up for you; that you were either too busy studying or on tour. I never had the heart to tell her when Craig saw your parents pick up drinks for you at his shop. When you came to visit, you know, you never came to see her. That would've torn her apart, and yet, even without explaining that, you still managed to rip her heart out and break it."

"I'm sorry."

"I don't care. No matter Jade's decision, I will never accept you as my family. I will never trust you or forgive you for the immense pain you've caused her. I'm done wasting my time with you, and I will see my daughter. You should stay away."

Amorio left, leaving Alex alone with even more guilt. He had no idea Amorio knew about those short visits home. Alex wondered if he had come to see her those times how different things would be. If he only showed her a fraction of the kindness she showed him, then maybe she wouldn't be in the condition she is right now. Alex set up the interview in spite. He was tired of the attention she got from other men. He wanted to remind Jade of her place, and now, he guaranteed he did just that.