A Testament to When I Loved You

XXIII. missing father

December 9, 2021

I miss you,

I miss the me that I am

When I'm with you.

I miss our little talks by the sea,

I miss the comfortable silence,

I miss the way you pat my head sometimes,

Assuring me that everything is alright.

I miss you, Dad,

I miss your unshakable confidence

In yourself and in me,

I miss how you validate my feelings,

And let me know that it's okay

To feel this way when the

World tells me that it isn't.

I miss you so much,

I miss our small adventures,

Driving everywhere and nowhere,

Eating at new places and

Talking to people I never thought

I would be able to talk to.

I miss you, Dad,

How you always make me feel

Comfortable enough to be myself

And confident enough to try new things,

Brave new waters, seek new horizons.

I wonder how you'd feel if you saw me right now,

Doubting myself, hating myself,

Torn between showing what I really feel and

Acting how I don't feel at all because

That's what everyone expects of me,

And letting these voices get to my head.

I miss you, Dad,

Let's see each other soon.