Marvel Women One Shots

I will always love you - Wanda Maximoff

Warnings: depression and self harm

Thank you @Im_high_as_fuck for the request! I love your username

Before we begin, let me say that these are serious issues and everyone struggles with it in their own way. While writing this, I used my own experiences and struggles with these topics for reference. In a way, I wrote how I wish it went with my parents when they found out.

If any of you struggle with this, just know that I love you all and I'm so incredibly proud of how far you've come. I know how hard it is. I wish I could give each and every one of you a hug.

I could hear the voices from downstairs in the kitchen. People were starting to get up and begin their morning. That was the last thing I wanted to do. In fact, I could probably just roll over and fall back asleep because I was so tired.

    Why was I tired? I have no clue. I've been feeling like this for a while, maybe a few months, but I don't know how long for sure. I had an idea of what it was but I was kind of in denial that I was actually depressed. Maybe it was just the fact that if I let myself believe that, then I could get worse. I'm not sure. I have no proof to back that assumption up. I didn't feel like this everyday, just a lot of days.

    I could hear my mom laughing at something downstairs, probably something her brother, my uncle, Pietro had done or said. My mom is Wanda Maximoff. Yes, the Avenger. It was pretty cool, having the Avengers as my family, with all my crazy uncles and Auntie Nat stirring up chaos. It made for an interesting childhood.

    Groaning, I knew that if I didn't get up soon, my mom or Nat would come looking for me. I grabbed my phone to check the time, seeing how much longer I can stall for.

    9:08 am.

    I could sleep for maybe another half hour before someone comes knocking on my door.

    Shifting slightly to get a more comfortable position, I closed my eyes, trying to will myself back to sleep.

    Of course it didn't work. My mind kept rambling.

    I kept thinking of everything that was going on, all the missions we've been running lately, how school was starting to get more difficult, and my constant fear of not living up to everyone's expectations.

    I had powers much like my mom's because, you know, genes. My mom rarely let me go along on missions, only allowing it when they needed extra people and if it wasn't too dangerous of a mission. But lately, more and more threats had been rising, so the Avengers needed all hands on deck, including me. This meant more time spent in the training room, which always ate up what little energy I had to begin with.

    Then there's school. I'm sixteen and in the same grade as Peter, which helps a little bit since he understands to a degree what life is like as a high schooler/Avenger. It was nearing the end of the semester, meaning classes were getting harder and teachers gave larger workloads. Finals were coming up in a month, leaving this constant, uneasy stress and worry weighing on my chest. Thankfully, today was Saturday, so I didn't have to worry about mustering up the energy to go to school. Thank god, because it was both mentally and physically draining.

    The best way I can describe everything was that it felt like the world around me had been switched to fast-forward, while I was stuck going at normal speed. It felt like time was slipping away from me and I hated it. I used to love life as a kid. Now, I'm just sort of tired of it. I don't know what I did wrong to end up like this. I felt numb, but felt like I was feeling everything all at once. 

    About twenty minutes later, I managed to fall asleep, not caring that someone would come barging into my room to wake me up soon. I just wanted the blissful ignorance of sleep. But like I knew would happen, it didn't last long.