UNDER THE MOON, Remus Lupin

lxvi.

HOME...
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"Why does he get to do this to me?" Alice was crying in the arms of her little brother in the empty platform. At anytime they wanted they could head to Sirius'. But Alice felt like dying over a stupid blanket.

Harry was comfortingly rubbing her back, though feeling quite out of place and awkward. Alice was never this emotional, besides how happy she was whenever she used to talk about Remus. "It'll be alright..."

The feeling should've began to fade by now. The only difference was that she wasn't crying as much anymore. It was sometimes hard to keep the tears at bay. Even more so with the added weight of the blanket he wouldn't take back. What prompted him to do this? Give her a blanket out of the blue after a breakup as if that were normal?

"Let's go home, Alice." Harry took Alice's hand, an encouraging action to get them out of the smouldering heat.

This was not what Alice imagined her life would be like when she left Hogwarts. She thought she'd be happily in love, on her way to being rich, and actually capable of smiling. Not some sobbing mess who was shattered like a broken flower vase that was thrown against a brick wall.

Home is where the heart is, but this wasn't her home. Home could be a person. And she'd been evicted from her home.

But she left her heart behind; nailed into the floorboards.

To Alice, this breakup felt like it was taking a much larger of a toll on her than it needed to. She made it seem like she was mourning death, not wallowing in the blood of her broken heart. Falling this hard for someone should've never been in the cards. Alice had loved before Remus. But she'd never been in love until she met Remus.

It wasn't fully love at first sight. Alice knew he was beautiful when she saw him. More beautiful than anyone she'd ever met. And that she wanted to know him. It wasn't until he began going out of his way for her that she realised she was falling in love. She'd been convinced he felt the same, falling so far in love with her that he'd never be able to climb out of that hole. Maybe he did for a while. But climbing out of the hole was too easy for him. It disappointed her. He left her behind. In the hole.

The first thing Sirius did when Alice walked through the door was give her a hug. A tight one. It was well needed.

Alice flat out refused to reoccupy the room that she and Remus had shared over Spring break. So Sirius out her in another room. It's not like he didn't have a lot of them.

The first thing she did when she walked in the room was stuff Remus' blanket in a corner. She planned to leave it there forever because she didn't even want it in the first place. Everything that Alice owned, she no longer wanted. Every piece of clothing had been taken off by Remus at some point, every book he'd read to her at some point, every spell he'd whispered to her at some point. Each thing in her life had been poisoned by him.

So Alice crawled into the bed and decided she didn't want to leave it.

As much as it hurt to admit... Alice Lafitte was still moon over wolf in love Remus Lupin, regardless that he probably didn't love her.

"Alice?" Harry had knocked on the door a few hours later. She wasn't asleep, but she wished she was. "We made dinner... if you're hungry."

Verbally responding required a lot more energy than Alice wanted to use. She said nothing and just closed her eyes again, pulling the covers above her head. Misery loves company. Harry walked away with a heavy sigh and she heard his feet retreat down the stairs. Alice felt bad for not replying, but her voice was exhausted.