Memories || Bucky Barnes

Chapter 3

2014
I walk around the Smithsonian as I do every year on March 10th.

'Best friends since childhood. Bucky Barnes and Steven Rogers were inseparable on both schoolyard and battlefield. Barnes is the only howling commando to give his life in service of his country' the speaker reads.

"Hello, my love. Happy birthday" I whisper as I stare at the video of him laughing with Steve. "I miss you...".

I take a deep breath and I leave. I head to the meeting spot; a bench behind the museum. Usually, only a few people walk by here but not enough to recognize or pay attention to us.

He is already there, waiting for me.
"I always look forward to our annual meetings, Steve" I say as I sit besides him

"Me too. How are you?" he asks as he keeps his head down. He is always wearing something to cover his head, like a cap, and looks down so he wouldn't get recognized.

"As usual. You?" I ask

"Good. Is it ok if we take this conversation elsewhere today? There is something I want to tell you" he suggests

"I told you enough times that I'm not joining your band and I'm not going close to another Avenger" I remind him

"I know. It's not about that. Even if someone with powers like yours would be a great addition" he insists

"Now you sound like Fury... I don't know how to fight. I freeze things with my hands, so not very helpful. And I want to keep a low profile. Howard made sure I'd look dead in the papers and I want to keep it that way" I insist

"But you never told me why he did that".

"Are you going to tell me what you want to or should I leave already?" I ask, dismissing his question

"Right. Come with me" he says and I follow him.

We walked and walked, until we got to a closed gym. His gym.

"I'm listening" I say as I fold my hands in front of my chest

"Bucky is alive" he bursts out

"I know" I reply.

"You... You know?" he asks shocked

"Yes. But I'm not sure it's still Bucky" I explain.

"Wait, wait. How do you know?" he asks

"I found out 3 years ago. I tipped off Nick Fury and we agreed that my name would never come up anywhere. But then the news of Captain America being found spread, and HYDRA was not happy" I explain

"So you also know that HYDRA is still active?" he asks

"Yes. In fact, I'm sure they have people in SHIELD because somehow they did find my name and they sent their greatest assassin after me. He gave me this..." I lift my shirt, revealing a long burn mark that goes from the lower left quadrant of my abdomen, around my side and to my back.

"He basically cut half of my torso open with a heated blade. If I didn't heal as fast as I do -at least at the parts the hot knife didn't touch-, I would be dead in seconds. I managed to hit him in the face and his mask fell off. I froze. But as soon as I looked him in the eyes, I knew that wasn't Bucky in there. So I ran. And I'm still running".

"Why didn't you tell me he was alive?" he asks

"Because after you defrosted, you said you wanted time to adjust" I answer

"I did but if it was about Bucky I would want to know"

"And how am I supposed to know what you want to hear!?" I ask

"So, instead you left without saying anything and we only meet only once a year on his birthday, right?" he answers, raising his voice

"Hey! You don't get to blame me or tell me I didn't care enough. I was the only one that cared all these years. I was the one who was alone for 66 years while you, and Bucky most likely, were sleeping under the ice. I watched everyone I loved grow up and eventually die, while my powers preserved me. And I was looking for your ass. I was by your side when you woke up from the ice. Then you asked for space and I gave it to you without argument, because being alone is the only thing I know how to do lately!" I remind him raising my voice as well.

Steve just stares at me, so I speak again
"I wanted to go find him more than anyone, but he almost killed me last time. I couldn't go at it alone. I stayed down and tried to learn more information instead".

"I'm sorry" he says looking down

"Of course you are..." I roll my eyes.

I start walking to the door. "I'll be back in an hour. Don't call or bring anyone".

I return to the place I have been staying for the last few days I've been in New York. I have a safe house in Norway that I stay in normally, except this time every year. And whenever I'm in New York, I rent different places under different names for safety.

But this time, as soon as I walk inside the apartment, a wave of heat comes over me. It feels like fire and I don't do well with fire. I opening the door, I see about 6 heaters placed in the living room and they're all turned towards me. He's here. Bucky...

Immediately, he grabs his gun to shoot me. At the same time, I lift my hand and I freeze the bullet in the air. A block of ice, a bit bigger than an ice cube, that contains the bullet in it falls on the floor.

I throw another one and I freeze his left hand, along with the gun, to the wall. It doesn't take him more than a second to break free because of all the heat, however the gun is ruined.

Honestly, it's better that he's wearing the mask right now. Makes it easier.

I try to go out of the door again but he grabs my hair and drags me closer to the warmth. He slams my head against a table, creating a wound on my forehead and due to the extreme heat, I can't use my powers to heal myself.

He wraps his hand around my throat, slams me on the wall and lifts me from the ground. I try to freeze his arm in order to make him drop me but I can't get passed his sleeve. I feel like I'm physically melting.

Noise from outside the door causes us to look there. It sounds like someone is fighting. I take the opportunity and I kick him in the ribs. Before he could get back, I take his mask off, and without looking I knee him in the jaw, all in less that two second.

I'm so sorry.

It doesn't stop him for long though. He spits blood on the floor and comes back up. But this time I see his face.

Unbothered.

Empty.

He throws a dagger at me and it gets planted in my stomach. I gasp and I reach for the table in my attempt to stay standing. He comes to me and pushes me against the wall. He holds the blade inside of me and starts to push it further upwards.

Breathing starts to get hard and I can taste blood in my mouth. I can't heal, I can't move him. And he's pushing the blade further inside me. I look into his blue eyes, they're empty.

"Bucky..." I whisper and my voice cracks in the end.

I notice his pupils dilate.

"Bucky?" I call again.

He looks down at the knife he is holding and then back at me.

"Emily!" I hear Steve's voice.

Bucky blinks a few times, like he is confused. He starts lowering me and lets me on the floor gently. He walks away unbothered. He turns off all the heaters and opens the windows.

It takes me a minute to pull the knife out of me and start healing. It takes him a minute to pick up his mask and disappear.

"Emily!" Steve yells again

"In here!" I answer.

"I figured I should have come with you. Are you ok?" he asks as soon as he sees me on the floor

"It was a close one" I admit

"There were 5 more guys downstairs. Was Bucky here?" he asks

"Yes. And I think he recognized me...".