You saved me

Chapter 13

Meredith's POV:

My alarm woke me up it was 5:30 am, I shut it off quickly to make sure it didn't wake up Ellis. That was then when the thoughts of last night came flooding back to my mind. I had told Derek. I told him one of my darkest secrets something that not even Alex knows. I'm an awful person. On top of that the person I had been building myself up to be was instantly destroyed after I had broken down in front of Derek. I do my hair, I look professional, I stuff all my feelings down and don't let them try and escape out except last night they did. The feeling of vulnerability has returned after all these years.

I don't like feeling vulnerable, I won't feel vulnerable anymore. How do I approach Derek now, maybe I pretend like it never happened, no it's too late for that now. He knows something about me now, I don't normally share things about me especially something like that. What am I going to do?

I'm going to push through it today. I've got out of bed I need to start the day. First stop was coffee so I headed downstairs to grab some.

It was Alex's Day off so I didn't bother to wake him as I walked through the living room. My hand touched the archway as I made my way through to the kitchen only to be startled by the sight I saw in front of me.
' Derek? What an earth are you doing here? I would have thought you had run away by now.' I nervously giggled.

' I told you I wasn't going to leave' he awkwardly smiled.' So I'm here, not leaving in fact I was going to cook you some breakfast I'm sure Ellis would love some though it seems there is no food in the cupboards for her to eat.'

' Yeah, I need to go grocery shopping more often.'

' Grocery shopping and you need to unpack. How long have you been here?' Derek pointed at all the packed up brown cardboard boxes.

' As soon as I got the call from Richard which was a week before I started I moved here, well I moved back here'

' So a while then. I'm surprised you still haven't unpacked.'

' I need to do a lot but I haven't had the time and as you know being a surgeon doesn't give you lots of free time add on the fact that I am the new chief of surgery getting everything into place will take a little while. I mean I still haven't had chance to decorate Ellis' room I need to buy her paint, a bed even, she's sleeping with me I guess you saw that last night.' I looked down at my feet slightly ashamed that I haven't done this yet. But I enjoy having her in my bed I know she should have her own bed I will definitely sort it this weekend. I feel like a horrible mother.

' I tell you what I will help you out. We will unpack these boxes together and I will take you to get paint maybe if you're nice I'll even paint the room for you.' A large smile plastered his face.

' I'm starting to feel like a charity case.'

' Don't . In fact I'm looking forward to it. Now do you have any milk so I can make something edible.'

'No. Nothing I will have to grab something on the way out for Ellis.'

'And what about you?' He raised a brow.

'Coffee!' I pointed at the mug of coffee I was pouring.

He didn't say anything he just hummed in response. I spoke up again ' thank you. Thank you for staying you really didn't have to, now you have seen how much of a mess I am I don't have myself put together, I don't even have this house put together and Iv been here for a while now .' I started rambling on and then I felt a strong pair of arms wrap me into a hug.

'It will all be okay Mer, now let me help you out this morning.' He said into my ear as we hugged.
I let out a breath 'okay. Thankyou.'

—
'Let's move missy' I quietly said to Ellis who was now dressed and ready for the day. Normally I wouldn't be quiet but as Alex was asleep I chose to be nice. This morning we are also leaving a little earlier as I need to stop and grab breakfast for Ellis Alex will have to nibble on that stale bit of bread in the back of the bread bin.