Book #2

Dream Journal

Sometimes I hope it is you-

I hope it is the future that I see-

that you are real-

oh i cannot think-

cannot think in more than-

half-phrases at a time-

a breath-

i hope that i can see the future-

and that it is you

that i am seeing

and that you are real.

Why would it seem 

so repetitive-

so repetitive-

so consistent-

consistently the same?

You are formed in the blurry-

the stuff of dreams-

dust and-

the pigment blending together-

approximate colors-

in a watery form.

I don't want to-

don't let go-

can't leave-

don't want to lose-

imagining-

hold onto you-

just a moment longer-

i can't let it-

let it back in-

it comes rushing in

to my head

again-

an assault of the real world-

don't want to let you go-

you might disappear-

for how long?

i don't know-

i don't know-

lost-

maybe forever.

I might not even remember-

remember you exist.

Tragic.

please-

please-

I struggle.

I am trying-

trying to remember

you.

Can I write-

describe you-

what i remember-

what i think-

what i know-

of you?

You are-

bigger than me-

taller at least-

your build is pretty similar.

I don't think I'm in love with you-

not in the exciting-

anxiety-inducing-

limerent-

kind of way-

but i certainly love you.

In the dreams

I can feel it.

that much i'm sure of/

i think you're darker than me-

i'm not sure,

maybe it changes/

that's not to say you

i'm under the impression that

at the very least

you are my type-

whatever that means.

you're not unattractive

but realistically

you aren't unflawed.

I prefer my humans

whole

people.

Your hair-

fun to play with-

is-

textured-

maybe wavy or curly?

you know me so well :)

you like to play with my hair.

i like when you

you have a certain way with me,

like you know exactly what to say-

at least most of the time,

and you get me to be better.

you remind me where i came from

and how far i've gotten

and that i still am going.

you teach me to improve

and still you are okay

with all

you are patient-

you are patient with me-

with my mistakes-

with my difficulties;

all of me

you have a way with me-

fuck