Façade

Facing the inevitable

Killua's POV

She muttered words that I couldn't hear, under her breath. I was lost in the feel of her body against my chest and my hands around a her small waist. The question she asked me rang in my my ears. What are we to each other? I really didn't know. But maybe I'm just running away from the inevitable. Maybe the feelings I have for this girl is my arms is nothing like friendship. Maybe I'm not thinking about it because I just can't fathom such a thing. She snaked her hands behind my neck, halting all my thoughts. Her sincere eyes looked into mine reflecting
my confused emotions. I tangled my fingers within blue strands and brought her face closer to mine. Whatever this feeling is, this burning desire which is slowly etching itself into my soul, slowly and carefully, I don't want it to end. I know a person like me shouldn't want this. These gentle hands. These soft touches down my spine. These looks she gives me from time to time. I shouldn't want all that. But I...

I brought our faces together slowly. I could almost feel her soft lips on my own......"Hey Killua lets go and..." I was brought out of my trance when I heard Gon's cheery voice. He froze in front of the guest room clutching the door knob. His eyes were wide and eyebrows shot to his hairline. Lynn was bending towards me, her hands on my face, and my hands were buried in her hair. "...hang out?" Gon ended. Lynn blushed a bright red and got up from the bed and ran into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. I ran my fingers through my hair, not knowing how I forgot that Gon had a duplicate key to my apartment. "Um.... Was I interrupting something?" Gon asked in his teasing tone. I rolled my eyes. "No. You weren't" I said with a much more bitter tone than I intended. "I'm sorry if I did Killua. You should have given me a heads up" I stared at Gon, wanting to punch his face. "We were just talking"

"But it really looked like you guys were going to-"

"Whatever you thought was wrong then"

I pushed through him and walked to the living room with quick strides, desperately ignoring the hot blood rushing towards my face.

Lynn's POV

Gods. Great timing Gon. I sighed and slide down the door trying to calm myself. We were so going to kiss if Gon hadn't interrupted us. I couldn't deny it any longer. I definitely did have feelings for Killua. I just didn't know whether it was....love. Do I love Killua? I buried my face between my knees and took a deep breath. I straightened up and get myself together and exited the bathroom.

I walked into the living room and saw Gon and Killua comfortably seated on the sofa with grim expressions on their faces. Killua motioned me to come and sit next to him and I did, ignoring the heat that was rushing towards my cheeks. "So Killua told me that you saw someone resembling your sister is that right?" Gon said, getting straight to the point. I diverted my attention to the floor and slowly nodded. "How can you tell it's her?" I looked into Gon's comforting chocolate brown eyes and took a deep breath. "Well.... When we were 7 Lilianna tried eating a stapler and it cut her lip. The girl I saw today also had a mark on her lip" Gon placed his hands on his chin deep in thought. "Did you see Lilianna's body after she died?"

"Ya. She was still in the Zoaldick facility, undergoing special treatment. We got a call from them saying that She stopped breathing. We went and saw her soon after that.." Killua frowned also deep in thought. "What are you both thinking about?"

"Well we were just wondering if you saw that mark on her lip on the body"

"I... Don't know.. I don't think so"

"Sienna!!" Me, Killua and Gon pushed through the door to my house and froze. In the sofa we saw a guy who was dressed in a black leather jacket and leather pants which made his unnaturally looking pale skin to stand out. His orange hair was slicked back and he had two diamond studs in his ears. He wore a malicious grin over his face which sent shivers down my spine. His narrow cat like eyes scanned me Killua and Gon from top to bottom which made this guy even more creepy. "Who the hell are you are and where is Sienna?" The man chuckled and placed his hands in his knees. "Ah so your Lynn. Your feisty. I like that" I shivered again. God this guy is soo creepy. "Hisoka stop bullying her" Sienna came out of the room, wearing her white coat. "Hisoka? Who the hell is that guy?" I asked pointing to the man in black. "Lynn calm down. He's an...a.... An acquaintance of mine"
"Now that's just mean. After all we've been through" said the creepy man, Hisoka, his tone laced with sarcasm. "Shut up"
"I'm hurt" Sienna sighed and turned her attention to me again. "He's going to help us with our case"
"Him? The creepy dude is going to help us? You've gotta be kidding me Sienna"
"Hisoka is very good at this stuff Lynn. He has some... Experience of his own... So he's a pro"
"So your telling me that a criminal who's also your friend is going to help solving my case. This is ridiculous. We already have enough dirt Sienna"
"Trust me on this" I looked at Sienna's determined eyes and nodded. "Fine. But this is like asking for trouble"
"It will be fine Lynn. We'll be careful. Desperate times call for desperate measures"
"Ya ya. Anyway I came here cause I wanted to tell you something" Sienna motioned for the three of us to sit on the couch, and we did. Well away from Hisoka. "Well.. Today I went to see Lily" Sienna's eyes softened and I let out a tired smile. "And... Something happened" Sienna and Hisoka frowned at this and I continued. "I.... I saw lily in a trench coat near my parents graves" Sienna opened her mouth and closed it again. She looked at Hisoka, whose eyes were turned to slits and he was grinning like a madman. "Interesting. Your story Lynn......really intrigues me" I sweat dropped. Is this guy really going to help my case? "Glad you think that way"
"You told me that Lynn had a twin sister Lilianna who died right Sienna?" Hisoka asked Sienna not taking his eyes off me. "Well ya.... But they aren't identical twins"
"That's beside the point. What if Lilianna never died?" I got up from the sofa and glared at Hisoka. "What are you trying to say here? If Lilianna was still alive she would have contacted me or my parents in any way"
"Not if she was plotting to kill your parents" I stood there numb and completely still. This guy..... "Are you telling me that my sister killed my mom and dad?"
"That's if she's alive. There's no other way around it" my fists were trembling with anger. This guy I just met was going around and accusing my DEAD sister for murdering my parents. I swallowed my anger and continued glaring at him. Killua touched my forearm and I looked at him. His eyes softened and nodded towards the sofa, motioning for me to sit down. I sighed and flopped down on the sofa next to him. "Like I was saying. Witnesses said that a girl looking like yourself came out of the house covered in blood. You both are twins. Based of the pictures, the only thing different in you two is your hair and eye color. Nothing a little blue wig and blue lens can't fix" my heart was racing a mile a minute. No. This was not possible. Lily.... No she couldn't. She wouldn't. But... She's not supposed to be alive!! "I'm going out for some fresh air" I got up from the sofa on my trembling legs and left the house. I heard footsteps following me and turned to face Killua. "Are you ok?" Killua asked in a gentle tone. I shook my head. I didn't know what to believe. I.. Is.. Was lily still alive? "I....don't know... I don't know if I should trust myself anymore"
"Lynn stop speaking like that. I was with you remember? I saw her too. Not just you" I clutched Killua's shirt and leaned my forehead against his strong chest. "You don't know how I'm feeling right now. I just came to terms with Lilianna being dead now I have to go back to thinking that maybe she's alive!!!" Killua grabbed my forearms and forced me to look at him, his sea green eyes churning with emotions. "I know. I know!! But I'm trying to!! I told you we'll go through this thing together. You didn't kill your parents Lynn. You don't have to be punished for a crime you did not commit" I looked down, once again drowning in guilt and self loathing. "I think it would be better if I just take blame for this thing. If I'm removed from the picture.. All this wouldn't be happening. All this... This...all these fucked up lies!!" She gently pushed Killua away buried her fingers in her hair. "All these lies to construct this stupid facade. All these lies to become a new person. A person I don't hate. A person who's not drowning in the dark with no light in sight. This broken...this fucked up thing... I wanted to be someone who actually had a life" I blinked the tears out of my eyes looked at Killua. This was just pathetic. So vulnerable. This pathetic side of me who has no control over the situation, I tried so hard to hide it. But whenever I'm with him he breaks through all the carefully constructed walls. I feel real with him. I feel like... I don't have a facade when I'm with him. But... Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Killua looked down, his bangs hiding the sea green eyes. "You.... All you ever do is blame yourself for everything don't you? Look. Get this into your head. We are all staying cause we know what the stakes are. And we want to help you Lynn. And if your so bothered about lying to people about who you are then strip down those lies and show them the real you"
"You know I can't do that. Everyone hates the real me" there was a giant pregnant pause that hung in the air. I didn't know whether Killua was going to explode or just slap me. If his clenched fists where any indication, he was angry. But why? Just when I turned to leave, Killua grabbed my wrist. I turned around and immediately felt his lips on mine. He pulled me closer by waist and kissed me deeply. This action of his again. This action that makes me feel loved and wanted. I shouldn't feel this happy right? Someone as pathetic and helpless as me? I closed my eyes desperately trying to hold back my tears. I felt his tongue on my bottom lip asking for entrance and I opened my mouth. Our tongues danced together in a rhythm only known to us. I slid my hands in his soft silver strands and sighed in relief. Killua broke away from the kiss. Both of us panted as we rested our foreheads against each other. This happiness....

I truly think I'm falling for this guy.

I whimpered a little and Killua gripped my waist tighter, bringing our chests together and whispered,"But I love the real you" and the tears broke loose, and along with the tears fell the mask.

Hey guys!!
Killua confessed!!
How do you think the relationship is going to progress from here?
I'll be happy to know your thoughts
And thank you, everyone who read Façade so far
I greatly appreciate it
Until next time😎