Façade

My Little Flowers

Normal POV
The next day Lynn stepped through the school gates being genuinely happy. Aside from the fact that they hadn't gotten anything regarding the case, it was a breath of fresh air to come to this place. But at times she just wished she could walk through those gates without the wig.

She didn't want to pretend to be someone else. She didn't want to keep up the lie. But it was mandatory. It was a huge thing that the police even allowed her to attend school after the allegations, but coming here and reveling her true identity was just pushing it too far.

The churning in my stomach settled down when I saw a mop of silver hair. Somehow seeing him automatically made my day better. I smiled and turned to face Jienna. "Hey. So what's your first cla-" Killua caught me by the waist, turned me around, and kissed me on the top of my forehead. "Hey Lynn" His breath ghosted over my skin, and it burned. Every part of my skin burned. I was probably blushing. A lot.

Jienna raised her eyebrows and I started stuttering. Killua smiled and kissed me again and left with a small wave, leaving behind a surprised Jienna, and me, stuttering and blushing.

"Wow. This is actually rich. You and Killua are dating?" Jienna said, with wide sparking eyes and giggling like a little kid. We were currently sitting out, leaning against a tree, eating our lunch. The word sounded very weird. Dating. I never thought that I would reach that stage in my life where I could actually love someone. I smiled at Jienna. Only if she knew how messed up things are. "It kinda just happened you know..." I hope she doesn't pry fir information.

There was still that small part of me that wanted to grab Jienna, take her somewhere were no one can hear, and tell her everything. From start to finish. This game of pretense can never last that long. And I don't want to keep lying to her. But I still couldn't help but think 'what if'. I leaned my head against the bark of the tree and stared up at the blue sky. I wish my life were like those clear blue skies with the perfect amount of sunshine and clouds floating around forming different shapes and sizes.
"Hey Yuka?"
"Hm?" I called out distractedly.
"Is it possible to fall out of love with a person?" I looked at Jienna trying to decipher her expression. "Where did that come from?" I asked one eyebrow raised. She sighed and stared up at the sky once again. Instances like these remind me of how much we are hiding from each other. How many secrets we have. It's not like it's wrong to have secrets, but aren't friends supposed to be people you can trust?

"No. I was just thinking. Is it possible to hate someone you used to love? Like... Can you ever hate Killua?" The question really startled me and scared me all at the same time. Hate Killua? I hugged my knees against my chest and placed my chin on top of them. Love was an expression I'm really not used to just displaying for everyone to see. I show my love for people in the most twisted and complicated ways possible. And that's not what I'm doing with Killua at all. I'm literally wearing my heart on my sleeve, not minding the fact that Killua would know exactly how much he means to me. If there comes a time when I might hate Killua... He would have had to shatter my trust and my feelings. And that's something that I'd never ever want. Not again. If Killua shatters my heart... The very thought scares me. How does this person mean so much to me in so little time?

"Actually it really scares me to think that I might hate something or someone that I love right now. It's a painful feeling. But people always say that when you love someone there's always the risk of hate. And I don't deny that. I've felt those emotions before. If I ever hate Killua... If that day ever comes.. I think it would be for a legit reason. But... I know that deep down inside I can never hate him with every fiber of my being as I'm supposed to, and I'll probably hate the fact that I'm not able to hate him. But to answer your question... I don't really think you can hate a person you've loved before. I mean there will probably still be a part of you who likes this person whose hurt you so much"
"Are you sure? Are you sure that you can't hate them so much that you'd want to kill them with your own hands?" I looked at her completely startled. I never thought Jienna had these dark thoughts buried deep inside her. I never thought that she could also have her own problems. She furiously wiped her eyes with her sleeve and got up. "Sorry for that. I'm sure you didn't want to listen to my bullshitty life. Anyway let's g-" I caught her by the wrist and pulled her back down.