Like a cockroach, Always Survives

82. Kol Mikaelson | I know i failed you...

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You're compelled to forget Kol for your own protection but get turned into a vamp years later and he helps you through it and is sorry he failed you. You understood why he did it but you missed him and you guys get back together.

***

 the day you're compelled

Tears rolled down my cheek, the sheer thought of living a life without Kol seemed miserable. Yet as Kol stood in front of me, prepared to wipe every memory, every speck of feelings i've ever had for him I can't help but feel alone even if I hadn't been compelled yet.

"i love you" he whispers, his voice breaking as a tear rolls down his cheek. His family had been getting really badly beaten so he thought making me forget him would keep me safe.

He places a hand on my cheek, running my thumb along it slowly "you're going to forget me, forget every memory we've ever had. Whenever you hear my name you're disgusted by the way it rolls of someones tongue, you don't remember me at all." he says.

the day you're turned (seven years later)

"y/n drink the blood damn it." Damon says biting his wrist shoving it in my mouth, some weird people had come after us in an attempt to get elena and stefan for their weird ritual. I think I just died.

I wake up in my bed to see everyone sitting around me "ouch, what happened? my head is pounding and i'm... thirsty." my head turns to Jeremy, a loud beat coming from his neck.

"you're transitioning, you need to feed." Caroline mumbles when a familiar yet strange looking male walks through the door "and you're a perfect mentor for her." Damon spins around "Yes well your girlfriend called me to help her, don't get too excited to see me." the man rolls his eyes sitting next to me.

"who are you?" I ask the man who looks at me almost sad at the fact I just asked who he was, "wait doesn't she-" "she won't remember me." the man cleared his throat "You're right I don't? Who are you." I say to him.

"Kol Mikaelson." the man says "i don't know you, but i know that name and I don't like you." I narrow my eyes to the original. The disgusting man that stood before me that was confusingly charming in his own way.

"Believe me when you turn you'll want me to help you." the man crosses his arms "No thanks." I mumble getting up out of bed almost falling over as the man catches me "drink this" he says handing me a blood bag, the veins popping up from under my eyes as I almost eat the bag, the blood tasting gracious compared to what I thought it'd be like.

Then with the blink of an eye, a rush of memories with people I didn't know existed appear in my mind. But with one specific person in every memory, Kol Mikaelson.

My eyes shoot open and I look around to see if Kol was really in front of me or if it was a figment of my imagination. My voice breaks as tears roll down my cheek. Surely it wasn't real, it felt like he had compelled me away yesterday.

"why?" I whisper my voice breaking through despite trying to hold it all in, everyone leaves the room except for Kol.

"seven years Kol. Why." I say with tears ready to burst out all at once. He places a hand on my cheek like he did before he compelled everything away "i'm sorry." he says.

"you were leverage, if they had you, they knew they had me." he says, his voice also breaking whilst wiping away my tears "it took seven years before you could even come and get me." i say "i had to die before you came back, Kol." my lip quivers.

"I know I failed you..." he says "But I can help you, I promise." he smiles through the pain "I won't leave, I won't do anything." he continue "I'll be there for you." he says.

a week later

It's been a confusing week, with the constant blood eating, random vamping around the house and not to mention the blood lust.

Kol stayed with me for the whole thing but he said he wants me to come back to New Orleans with him.

"Now get up here." Kol yells from the top of the Salvatore house "that's high." I cross my arms. It took me a few days to realise that Kol had compelled me because he cared, maybe the 'i love you' being his last words to me didn't really cut it.

Closing my eyes and jumping up, not looking where I was going I feel two arms wrap around me as I stumble back "careful darling." he chuckles as I open my eyes, it was sunset and Kol had planned to watch the sunset with me.

We both sit on the roof, admiring the pinkish blue sky.

"Do you remember New Orleans?" he asks me and I shake my head "No, it feels like forever since I've been there." I sigh, it took a few minutes before I made myself comfortable by resting my head on Kol's shoulder.

He chuckled softly "it was a long 7 years without you my love." he spoke softly as I look up "believe me it felt very long, I'm a 1000 years old and I've never missed someone so much." he whispers grabbing my face gently, pecking me on the lips.

"Don't leave me again, yeah?" I say to him and he chuckles "I'm serious." my eyebrows furrow and he nods holding back his laughter at my seriousness "I know y/n, i'd never leave you, ever again.".