Gangster's Girl (Complete)

Chapter 11 - Part 1

"Get up." The voice demanded.

Why was it so bright? I opened an eye and closed it quickly against the glare. The light in my bedroom was on. Something soft landed in my face. It was a shirt.

"Now, Kira." The voice continued his demands.

While I sat up I rubbed my eyes trying to figure out what was going on.

"You're late."

I opened my eyes again but this time they had adjusted to the bright light and I could see the face of my tormentor. It was James. He was standing in the middle of my room. Looking less than happy.

"What time is it?" I reached for my phone.

"Ten past four."

"I'm sorry," I mumbled, stumbling out of bed.

"You have five minutes," he said before turning his heel and walking out of my room.

How could I have overslept? I chastised myself as I got dressed as quickly as possible and brushed my teeth. I didn't even have time to run a brush through my hair so I tight it up in a messy knot.

James was pacing by the front door as I descended the stairs.

"Next time you're late our arrangement is over." His tone was level but serious.

"I'm sorry," I mumbled again, feeling like I was messing up on everything.

The lack of sleep and sleeping with Angel for a second time had tied me up in knots. I hadn't slept well for the remainder of the evening once I had gathered my clothes quietly while Angel had showered. By the time he had finished I had been back in my own room trying to figure out the point I had lost all control with him. The point at which I should have stopped myself. But I came to the realization that I couldn't have.

I had decided the best course of action would be to avoid him at all costs especially when he was close. That's when he was his most dangerous.

James seemed to be a lot less patient with me and was a lot more demanding than he had been before. It didn't help that I was feeling emotional vulnerable and physical tired.

"You need to concentrate," he said as I tried to aim the gun. My aim was slightly improving although I was far off being a crack shot. Hired assassin was not in my future job possibilities.

When I fired the gun and I didn't hit the target once James shook his head. "This isn't working." He took the gun from me.

"I'm trying," I told him, afraid he would stop helping me.

"Not everyone is built for this Kira."

That didn't make me feel better in any way. I was in this life with no choice in it, I needed this to be able to survive.

"I need this James." I hated how emotional I sounded.

He stopped what he was doing to study me for a moment. "Fine. Let's try some self defense."

He put the gun away and led me to a different room where there was a gym mat.

The thought of going up against someone as big as James gave me a moment of panic but I ignored it. I had to be able to protect myself. If I was ever in a situation where I could use this it would be worth it. And there was a part of me that hoped by improving my physical strength it would translate in a stronger mental strength.

At the moment I felt so vulnerable in both and I knew I wouldn't last if it didn't improve.

Last night with Angel had been a prime example of how weak I was emotionally. I had felt so connected with him in a physical way it and translated to an emotional level that had been knocked when he had brushed it off so easily like it hadn't mattered at all.