A life with you

Starting again

Lizzie's POV

Today I have another interview, I've been having a lot, we also traveled to Germany, Ethan stayed with Sofia and my mom, somedays he stayed with my mom and somedays he stayed with Sofia, we were upset about leaving him but we didn't want to expose him to the world and we were so sure that if we would have took him with us some people would have took photos of him so it was better that way even though we really miss him

I had to fly to London but Y/N didn't come with me she had to go back to LA because Ethan had fever, I wanted to go too but I needed to stay here in London, continue doing press, Y/N made sure to keep me updated but I feel like I should have been there, he is good now, but some nights the fever comes back, I feel like a bad mom but Y/N reassures me that I am not and that Ethan is okay and he will be fine

Even though all the bad thoughts are still there, yesterday when I FaceTimed them, Ethan looked way better and that made me feel good. Today is the last day here in London and I'll go back to see them, I really miss them so much, this is the first and last time we separate, I really hate it, I know it's for Ethan but we will have to be careful and cover his face but I really don't want to go places without him or without Y/N. I'm sure if I explain to Y/N how I felt this days without them and tell her my proposal she will say yes

I know it would be more complicated and is risky but I'm also sure Y/N and I are going to keep Ethan safe, and we will never know what would happen if we never try, I know Ethan is still so little but I don't want to be without him, I don't want to miss things, another bad thing is that after all of this press I have press of our book, the one I wrote with Robbie, and I think that will bring problems with Y/N, I know even if she doesn't say it I know she doesn't like that I wrote a book with him, I know she doesn't like the thought of me being with Robbie even though we just talk and work in our book

I know Y/N supports me and she likes that I wrote a kids book but she doesn't like that I wrote it with him, and I don't know why but I feel like she will feel bad that I will be doing interviews with him, I don't even know if she will want to go with me, I mean a part of me wants to think she will come with me but I also know how she feels when she sees him

I can't wait to go back to LA, today is my last day here, I know it hasn't been that much of days but I feel like it has, and the days goes even slower since Y/N left. I was done with one of the interviews, and I decided to go for a coffee, it's so fucking early and I'm feeling so tired, after buying it I went to a park and sat there, I haven't seen paparazzi yet, that's the good thing about London, here paparazzi are respectful and there are not a lot of them which is good and peaceful. I was enjoying my coffee when I feel a tap on my shoulder making me turn to see who it is

I'm shocked it's as if I invoke him, "Hi Lizzie I really thought it was you, so I came here to make sure" he says as he sits next to me "Hi Robbie" I mumbled, even though I know there are no paparazzi close I make sure no one is watching us, I know for sure if someone sees us and take photos of us there will be a lot of rumors, and I really don't want that, is so fucking exhausting. We started talking about what we are doing here and then we talked about our book

I didn't realize I had to go back to another interview "Sorry Robbie I don't want to be rude but I have to go back" I told him as I stand up and he stands with me "Oh let me walk with you" he said. I don't really think that's a good idea "It's alright it isn't that far I'll be okay" I told him not wanting to tell him no but hoping he will get that I don't want him to go with me "Oh please, let me, I just want to make sure you arrive okay and nothing bad happens to you" I know him and I know he won't drop it so I accepted

I thought it was close but it isn't I really didn't notice how much I walked "And how's Y/N? Why isn't she here with you?" He asked me "She's in LA, Ethan got sick so she had to go back" I explained him and he hummed "And how's that little boy?" He asked and I smile "He's good I mean yesterday Y/N said he was happy and the fever was gone, I texted her earlier but she hasn't reply she must be sleeping" I told him and he hummed "That's good" he said and I nod