History - Bucky Barnes

Wedding

~ Vivian
Here I am. Standing in front of the rest of my life.

The moment I've mourned since 1943 is here.

I take deep breaths. In and out.

I'm gonna marry him. I'm actually gonna do it.

Oh my god I'm going to marry him.

I'm not wife material! I'm wearing combat boots for my wedding shoes for god sakes.

No no no I'm just freaking myself out.

Breathe. Breathe.

Oh my god what if he realizes he doesn't love me anymore I mean it's been what, 70 years or so?

Shit.

Breathe. Breathe.

"I can practically hear the over thinking from over here"

I turn around and see Tony in the nicest suit which says a lot because he's not one to turn down a nice dinner or event but this suit.

It doesn't look performative, or like he sent Happy or Pepper to get it. It looks like he took the time to pick it out himself.  

It means more to me that he put in effort for this than he will ever know. Not that I'll give him the satisfaction of knowing.

"Hey woohoo" Tony says snapping in my face bringing me out of my daze.

"Yes I'm here." I say.

"No you're not, where'd you go?"

I take another deep breath.

"Do you ever feel like you are your parent's mistakes." I bite my lip realizing who I just asked that question too.

I look back at him with a pained look.

"No it's okay. Better me to answer that than anyone else, really. I've got some experience so let me see if I've got this right. You rejected Bucky's proposal back in the 1900's because you were scared you'd become angry and fall out of love the way your parents did, correct" Tony says.

He always has to gather the facts.

"Correct."

"Right, always am. So you wait, then you lose Bucky, and miraculously you get him back. Of course as any person would you want to take a step with him you regret not taking before so let me ask you one thing..." Tony says.

I look up at him waiting for him to ask his question.

"Why are you scared now. You've had decades to think about what if, how come, what could, or what did. Why are you scared now?" He says.

I let out a soft laugh.

"My parent separated before I was born. Two weeks later my mom found out she was pregnant so they got back together. What if Bucky doesn't want this, after all we've both been through especially him, we've changed."

"Vivian. You're entire life is surrounded around the idea of being unsure of things. How many pep talks a day do you have to have just for one decision."

Ouch but no he's right.

I have the inability to make a decision without talking to someone else first, Tony, Steve, Nat, Shuri, T'challa, T'chaka, even Thor and he gives the worst advice.

"You want this. Don't overthink it, don't stress, don't talk yourself out of it. Stop being scared of the what if's. Embrace them, you both are strong enough to handle it, we know that for a fact." Tony says.