Red lights

red rose

Hyunjin

"hyunjin" i wake up to the whisper of felix's voice in my ear, i straddle my arms and legs around him, pulling him to the bed, "hey no i just did my hair" felix laughs as i ruffle his hair, "come on get up i have a surprise" he kisses my cheek. he opens the curtains "since the weather is nice today..." he grabs my arms and pulls me up, taking me to the living room, he points at a picnic basket, "we're gonna go on a picnic" he grins and claps, "this is the first time i've ever been excited about waking up at 8am" i pinch his cheek.
"i'll carry it." i say as we walk to the park, we settle under a tree. i sit and lean on the tree, felix immediately puts his head on my lap and grabs my hand to massage it, "i always loved when you did that" i remark, "that's exactly why i did it" he looks up at me and smiles "where did you get this ring from?" he asks, "idk..i got it somewhere random", i notice that his knuckles are still bruised, "does it hurt?" i ask, "nah, i'd do it all over again if i could" i try to hide my blushed cheeks, "oh i  couldn't sleep at night so i made you some brownies" he exclaims, getting up to open the basket.

Felix

"wait felix i'm starting to get a little cold" his demeanor suddenly changes, "oh- okay we can go" i get up, "let's go back to my place okay?" he says as his eyes pace around the park, uh what?
the way to his house was filled with silence, we reach his house and i notice his eyes still pacing around "okay you wanna tell me what's going on?" i start to get annoyed "nothing..." he avoids eye contact with me, "hyunjin" i enunciate, "...just...something weird happened at the park...but it's probably nothing..." he stutters while he fidgets with his paint brushes, "hyunjin.." i put my hand on his back "it's probably nothing felix, just- just sit down i want to paint you" he points to the couch in the corner, "oh..okay" i giggle and skip to the couch.
"you're so cute when you're focused" i grin, "shut up" he blushes, "i'm almost done" he says, his tongue placed at the corner of his mouth. "mmm done!" he bites his lip. "okay turn it around i wanna see" i clap in excitement, "okay....what do you think?" he turns it around. he drew me with flowers in my hair, the same flowers we held together, the same picture he painted for my birthday, aaa this man is going to drive me insane. my eyes instantly drop to the writing under the drawing of me
be my boyfriend?
he nervously bites his nails "i-....i think....i think..." i jump up and hug him, he picks me up and twirls me around, i plant a kiss on his lips "your first kiss as my first official boyfriend" i exclaim, brushing my fingers through his hair, his eyebrows perk up, "oh i forgot" he drops me on the couch and runs to his room, "i remembered that the ring i got was a couple ring set, so here, you better never take it off." he gives me the ring, and i instantly put it on, "oh and" he comes up closer and holds my chin, leaning in for another kiss "you forgot to say that i'm your last too".

Hyunjin

we reach the hallway to the makeup room, felix rubs my back as he senses me getting nervous, we stop near the doorway, "they're so loud" i'm able to hear all of them inside, "remember that i'm okay with doing whatever you're comfortable with." he holds my hands, "yeah, i know....they need to know, they deserve to." i sigh out, he tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. "listen i just need to go to the bathroom, you can go in first, see how the mood is"  i say, "sure, i'll be waiting for you okay?" he assures me, i nod and head to the bathroom.
i wonder how they'll react i think as i wash my hands. bang chan and lee know took it well, so i'm pretty sure the rest will too...god i was the one who wanted to do this why am i suddenly getting nervous...i guess the thing at the park kind of spooked me- i suddenly hear a door shut with a bang, i dont think much about it until i hear glass shattering, i run to the hallway to see hunched shadow standing over a broken mirror, blood dripping from his hand, next to him is han and lee know, i run up closer to them, han looks like he just saw a ghost, while lee know tries to calm the guy down, as i step even closer.... "felix?!?!.." i realize that it's him, i look down.. "..y- your hand-" i grab his hand but he doesn't budge,"-hyunjin give me your phone." he suddenly demands, his eyes glued to the floor, my hands begin to shake. "w-what felix you're bleeding-" he looks into my eyes, his gaze icy-cold "-do i look like i give a FUCK hyunjin just give me your GODDAMN phone." he slams his hand on the wall. the whites of his eyes are fiery red, i've never seen him like this before. i tremble as i 
take out my phone from my pocket, changbin comes out of the room, and his eyes practically pop out of their place as he dissects what's happening "felix don't-" lee know grabs his arm as he snatches my phone from my hand, felix escapes his grip "back. off." he points at him, the veins in his forehead are almost going to burst. "HEY! felix dont-" changbin pulls him back, felix hastily lets go of changbin's grip "-YOU TOO." changbin steps back as felix shouts, i guess none of us have ever seen him like this, everyone's eyes here are filled with one thing: fear.
i don't like this, i dont like any of this. tears start forming in my eyes as i realize what's happening. The others slowly come out of the room, their faces fill with worry the second they look at felix and me. i make eye contact with I.N and i just start crying, confusion paints his face as he comes to hold me. i hear felix whining and in an instant, he smashes my phone on the floor, making me jump in terror, "felix- FELIX WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!" lee know shouts as felix steps on my phone with his heel, shattering it to pieces, he runs his fingers through his hair in defeat, after a few silent breaths, he wipes his tears and looks at me, his face conveys a lost, helpless child, as i look deeper into his eyes, i begin to see fear too, but what is he so scared of? "i'm sorry." he mouths, his breath hitching as his tears uncontrollably roll down his cheek, he looks at everyone one last time and then back at me again, and i know that we're thinking of the same thing
i will never be able to forget this moment.
he runs off, leaving me with nothing but a broken phone, and a shattered heart.