Surviving The Complicated [Book Four]

Twenty Three

Demi

I was discharged just a few days later but the twins still had to remain in the NICU. I got the biggest cuddle off my babies when I got home. Isaiah's little arms were so tight around my neck that it was a little difficult to breathe, but I wasn't about to push him off. He obviously needs it as much as I do.

"I missed you all so much" I pressed a soft kiss to Isaiah's shoulder as I reached out to caress Kyra's cheek as she remained knelt on the floor beside me. I then glanced to Ayla who was sat on the floor beside her sister. "I love you" Kyra leant into me and wrapped her arms around Isaiah and I. It was a hug I knew they all needed as much as I did.

"Mommy, when the babies come home?" Isaiah questioned later that day as I tucked him into bed.

"Hopefully soon. They're getting so much stronger. You excited to be a big brother?" he nodded as he curled up with what looked like one of my sweaters in his arms. "Is that my sweater, Baby?" I gently played with his curls.

"It smells of you. It feels like a cuddle" tears burnt at the back of my eyes and my heart ached a little. "You want it back?"

"No, Baby, you keep it" I leant to press a soft kiss to his forehead as a single tear rolled down my cheek. "I love you so much, Baby Boy. Have a nice sleep, okay?"

"I love you more, Mommy."

"I don't think so" my lips twitched into a smile as he tiredly giggled. "Sleep good, Baby" I pressed another kiss to his cheek and then pushed myself to stand. I bit down on my lip at the ache, trying to keep my whimpers to a minimum. I don't want to scare Isaiah. I'm home, I don't want him to ever think that I'm going to leave him again. I took one last glance at my little boy and then shut his bedroom door. I leant slightly against the wall as I released a breath, pressing my hand against my stomach. This recovery is kicking my ass. I forced my eyes open as I heard the sound of a door opening. A light smile spread across my face as Ayla stepped from the bathroom. "Hi Peanut" her beautiful brown eyes were full of worry.

"Are you in pain?"

"Just a little, but I'm okay" I gently pushed myself away from the wall. "Can I have a hug?"

"I don't wanna hurt you" she looked almost scared.

"You won't hurt me, Baby" Ayla nibbled on her lip as she stepped up to me. I wrapped my arms around her, slid my fingers through her hair and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. Ayla's arms were loose around my waist but it was only a moment later that I heard her sob. The sound made my heart break and I just tightened my grip around her. I continued to comb my fingers through her hair as she cried against me, her hands gripping at the back of my shirt. The sounds of her quiet sobs pulled at my heart and the tears once again welled up in my eyes. "I love you so much, Baby Girl" I softly kissed her head and then loosened my grip from around her as she took a step away from me.

"I was scared you-you were gonna..." my heart broke as her chin quivered. "I'm sorry for being a crab-butt."

"You aren't a crab-butt, Baby" I softly laughed as I gently wiped the tears from her cheeks with my thumb. "And I promise that I'll always be here with you. I'm not leaving, okay? You and your siblings are my world."

"Mommy, can Daddy adopt me and Kyra?"

"Is that something you want?" she instantly nodded. "I'll see what we can do, okay? But I'm sure Daddy would love that. We'll keep it a surprise for now though, yeah?"

"Yeah, it could be for Father's Day or something" my smile widened at the excitement on Ayla's face.

"I love you so much, Ayla Mackenzie."

"I love you" I cupped her face in my hands and leant to press a soft kiss to her forehead.

"Thank you for looking after your siblings whilst I was in the hospital. Daddy said you were such a help."

"I don't mind. I can't wait for Eli and Indi to come home" I slid my fingers through Ayla's hair as we headed towards her bedroom. "Oh, I have a dance competition in May and I have a solo" my lips tugged into a wide smile.

"I can't wait to see it, Peanut" I gave Ayla one final hug and then headed towards Kyra's bedroom. She was sat on her bed with her journal on her lap. "Hey Angel" she glanced up at me and the tears rolling down her cheeks made me panic. "What's wrong, Beautiful?"

"You-You nearly died because of me" she closed her journal as she choked on a sob.

"What are you talking about, Baby? What happened wasn't your fault" I gently lowered myself down onto her bed.

"I-I wanted the babies to come so-so you wouldn't be in-in pain anymore" I wrapped my arm around her.

"It wasn't your fault, Baby."

"Daddy said that too, but..." she began to play with her fingers. "I'm sorry" I caressed her cheek until she glanced up at me. I flashed her a light smile and shook my head.

"It wasn't your fault, Kyra. You don't need to apologise. Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, you're okay and so are the babies" her lips twitched into a light smile. "You're not mad at me?"

"Baby, I don't have any reason to be mad. I love you."

"I love you too."

"If you need anything, you know where I am" she nodded and smiled up at me. I leant to press a soft kiss to her cheek.

Kobe stepped from the shower just as I took a seat on the edge of our bed. I glanced up at him and flashed him a light smile.

"Did you know Kyra blamed herself?" he released a breath as he nodded, taking a seat on the bed beside me.

"Yeah, she said. I thought I'd convinced her that she wasn't" I glanced down at my hands. "You think she needs to talk to someone?" I shrugged and then leant into his side.

"I don't think so but I'll keep talking to her. I don't want her to hold onto this amount of guilt. She's only 8" I lightly smiled as he pressed a kiss to the top of my head. "I love you."

"I love you too, so fucking much. You don't understand how relieved I am that you're okay."

——

I forgot how much I loved this family 🥹