Nonentity Probie {Marina/Maya & Carina}

Festive Frenzy (Chapter 26)

You know that feeling you get when you feel like somebody's watching you. The eerie feeling that you get, causing goosebumps to surface on your skin, causing the hairs on the back of your neck to stand.

Sometimes it really isn't someone watching you, and in fact it is just paranoia. Paranoia is a strong emotion, especially when you let it control you. It can change your opinions on people, cause you to become unaware of the real things going around you, and instead, you focus on the false.

Some may say that paranoia is a good quality to have. It keeps you on your toes, informs you when you feel uncomfortable, or even just causes you to speculate. Now sometimes those speculations can cause a wide variety of problems, for both yourself and the thing you're speculating about.

The constant need to look over your shoulder, or triple check if you have your ID on you. It's exhausting at times. It keeps your brain running for constant hours at a time, observing every minor detail that you can physically see, just so you can be prepared for what the observation could cause.

Now, that explanation may seem a bit extreme. Considering the only paranoia that is occurring right now is the queasy feeling of waking up, sleepy eyed and relieved.

Carina opened her eyes to be met with the bright blue eyes peering at her. She was thankful she wasn't being gazed at by a stranger, but it was still creepy. "Were you watching me sleep?" She asked, a stretch making an entrance as she let a yawn escape her mouth.

"Is that a bad thing?" Maya asked, moving the soft strand of hair away from Carina's face and tucking it behind her ear.

"No...it's just slightly creepy" Her voice slightly hoarse from the deep slumber she had just woken from.

"Merry Christmas" Maya whispered as she cupped the italians face in her palm. Carina just grinned at the immense feeling of festivity that flowed through her.

The last few days have been abnormal. There was nothing wrong of any sorts, but there was this feeling that surrounded Carina. It wasn't a feeling of disconnection, or loyalty, but instead it was a comfortable confusion.

You know the feeling when you hum a song and you just can not place the name of the song, or the correct lyrics. Yeah, that's what I mean when I say comfortable confusion. It was the type of confusion that, if it wouldn't be explained, it wasn't the end of the world, but it was very irritating. It was like an itch that couldn't be scratched, and she just couldn't put a pin on it.

It surrounded Maya. It was like Carina had picked up on this new aura around her ever since their discussion five days ago. It was the way Maya nonchalantly spoke about something that irritated her so much, but never decided to mention the topic. She spoke to Carina as if this thing that bothered her so much, wasn't relevant.

And that is why this comfort confusion has formed. She can't help but think that Maya has other things going on that she thinks isn't relevant enough to talk about. Or maybe...she just doesn't want to talk to her about it. Either way, it has caused a slight thread to become loose between them.

The truth is though, Maya still swam in the pool of confliction and guilt, that she didn't have the urge to resurface and talk about it. Her mind was like a lazy river, constantly going around and around until that sudden rock at the river bottom stops her. She tugs and tugs for a way out, to the point that when she does get loose from that rock, she loses control of her rhythm and just...splashes. In the end, that water settles and she's back on her merry way...until she hits another rock.

If you couldn't tell. The rocks are her problems, and the splashes from the water are the daggers that she shoots with her words. The hostility she causes when she bottles up her emotions, is what causes the unwanted.