TRAITOR - woosan

3. you

Wooyoung (the party)

I look up at my phone to see if Yeosang texted me, but I only feel discouraged as he did not.

Normally I would be excited to kiss a bunch of random dudes all night without any thoughts. I like patterns and this one is probably my favorite. But I somehow don't really feel like exchanging saliva right now. I just want to forget about today and get high.

I put my phone back in my pocket, walk up the stairs of my cousin's house and open the door.

The music hit me so hard that I almost felt deaf for a second.

I try to find my way to the kitchen since the first floor is already full of people. I finally get there and get something to drink. 

I usually go to a lot of parties, but I definitely prefer going to bars and finishing the night in some stranger's bed.

***

I've been drinking for almost an hour now and I am already feeling dizzy.

Should I go or should I get another drink? Without noticing it, my feet lead me to the kitchen to get another cup of that suspicious brown drink. It tastes better than it looks I swear.

The kitchen is really too crowded and I don't know half of the people here. I always go to parties with Yeosang and it feels weird to be all by my side tonight. 

I can not believe Yeosang chooses him instead of me, his best friend. We both know that he dislikes me sleeping with random dudes for fun and that I should get a boyfriend. But I am not like that, I don't belong to anyone and he needs to understand that.

I move to another room and I completely freeze when I see him standing there.

Yunho.

The boy with brown hair and a drink in hand is looking at someone on the dance room floor. I try to find what his attention was at but when I looked back at him, his eyes were now looking straight at me.

Straight through me.

Why is he here? He always said to me that he'd rather be anywhere else than at a party after what happened to him that night...

I swipe this dark memory out of my mind and I decide to walk toward him with a cup in hand to get an explanation.

I usually avoid him in public spaces because I'm the one who pushes and pulls. He is also not ready to come out yet and I respect that. I guess being on the swim team comes with a reputation, we just did not want it to be obvious on campus. 

But since when did I sign up to be his boyfriend? Never. So I shouldn't care...

It also has been a horrible night for me so far; I decided to put my pride aside because I kind of need affection right now and I know Yunho is the perfect role for that. Unfortunately, he runs away as soon as I step too close to him. I know I deserve that. I messed up pretty badly today, but it's not like we are boyfriends. I don't owe him anything, especially sex.

I sit down, I don't want to run after him. If I do so, it will mean that I love him back, which is not the case here. I am allowed to have sex with anyone, just sex, no feelings imply.

I look at the dance floor and spot Hongjoong dancing. He is not simply good at sex, he is also an incredible dancer. 

I lick my lips and bite the bottom of it. Flashbacks of our time in bed today make me feel really horny. Thoughts of what I could do to him while he groans my name keep running into my mind and... I am brought back to reality when someone bumped into me and spilled his drink over me.

"What the fu.." I almost swear before meeting his eyes again.

Choi San.