The Razor's Edge [[Feitan x Reader]]

16: The Auction - part 1

"Hmm. . . maybe red?"

Shizuku was standing in front of her closet once more while Machi and I were sprawled lazily on her bed. She kept throwing dresses at me to try, but I wasn't in the mood. I still felt guilty going to the auction with everything that had happened the night before.

Shizuku seemed to interpret my disinterest as a sign that she was failing.

"Or black," Machi suggested half-heartedly from where she hung over the edge of the bed, playing solitaire on the floor.

Shizuku gasped. "Yes, you're so right!" She started digging through her closet again.

My gaze flicked between the two of them. "Hey, can I ask you guys something?"

Neither of them looked at me, but Machi hummed to acknowledge that she'd heard the question.

I continued. "It's just that we lost Pakunoda last night—and essentially the boss, too—and everyone in the troupe is acting, well, normal I guess. I don't get it."

Machi threw a card down with a little too much force. "What, you think we don't care?"

"Machi, she didn't mean it like that." Shizuku stopped rummaging through her clothes and came over to sit with us.

"You're right. I'm sorry, y/n. I know it's hard for you to understand."

"Please, I'd like to."

Shizuku rested her fingers on her chin as she thought about it. "I guess that, for us, death isn't so shocking since it's our only way in or out of the troupe, you know? When we join I think we almost have to accept that we become a target." She turned to Machi. "Does that sound right?"

Machi nodded. "Spiders don't die of natural causes. As sad as it is that we lost Paku, we know that some day we'll likely share the same fate."

"And you're okay with that?"

Shizuku shrugged. "Yeah."

"We chose this life for ourselves," Machi said. "It makes sense if you don't get it."

I didn't fully get it, no, but the girls made me understand that the troupe had to keep moving. We all had our own part to play, no matter what happened. So, I finally agreed to try on the dresses that Shizuku had picked out.

We decided on a black dress—like Machi had suggested—with a slit that stopped mid-thigh. The silky black material clung to my body, hugging my curves in such a flattering way that I couldn't help but blush, feeling a little silly about how nice I looked.

I tried to do my makeup, but Machi saw me struggling and took over, painting wings over my eyes and blurring out some eyeshadow in my creases. Shizuku stood behind me and fixed my hair while Machi worked.

I appreciated that Shizuku and Machi were so sweet and willing to help me. It was embarrassing being in my twenties and having so little experience with any of these things. It wasn't that I never had an interest in makeup or fashion or anything growing up, the priest just wouldn't allow it. He did everything he could to prevent me from 'becoming a temptress' and 'living a life of sin' or whatever.

I couldn't help but smile when I looked in the mirror now, knowing that if he saw me like this he'd fall to his knees and pray to God for my salvation or something.

Or he'd hold me down and add a few more scars to my collection. It would depend on how many people were around.

Feitan and Phinks were waiting downstairs for me. They both wore tailored black suits with matching bow ties.