Komorebi -namjin

25- sleeping beauty

"What happened to you eye?" Is the first thing Jimin says to him once they step into a room. It's Jimin's bedroom. Jeongguk can tell by all the tapestries and fake plant decorations. He inhales shakily, staring at their vanity mirror. His eye is definitely still bruised but not as dark as a few days ago. Seokjin has been making sure he puts ice on it to make the swelling go down.

Jimin steps closer to him, attempting to touch his cheek but he suddenly flinches. Jimin sighs and lowers their hand, frowning at him.

"I got in a fight with my dad." He mutters, turning to look at them.

"Your dad? I thought you said you don't live with your parents anymore."

Jeongguk sighs, "I didn't have anywhere else to go." 

Jimin frowns understanding what he meant. "You could've stayed with Hobi or Jin." Their voice sounds hurt and if Jeongguk is interpreting it right, they sound guilty.

"Hobi was going through his- I meant, her own problems. And Jin was depressed because of Namjoon. And, well...you kicked me out so I had no choice but to go back home. I-I didn't want to go back to the shelter because I might get robbed again."

Jeongguk then looks away. Jimin stares at him for a few more seconds before heading over to sit on the bed. Jeongguk follows suit, sitting beside them with a bit of space between them. He stares down at his legs, trying to calm his heart beat. He's anxious and hurt but he wants to seem strong. He wants to seem like he isn't bothered by anything but in truth, his chest aches. Jimin hurt his feelings a lot.

"Everyone was dealing with their own stuff, so I had no choice but to go home. And being there was stressful and horrible. My dad and I fought almost every day so I'd stay out as late as I could so that I could avoid seeing him. But he caught on and got mad so he beat me and when I started defending myself, he got even more aggressive."

He picks at a loose string on his pants. "I-I don't want to go there ever again."

"Gguk...I'm so sorry that you had to deal with that." Jimin says quietly. "I-I wish I wasn't being such an asshole to you back then. I'm sorry. You have a black eye now because of me."

Everything in Jeongguk wanted to tell them 'yes. This is your fault.' But he didn't, mostly because he knew that it wasn't 100% Jimin's fault. He's just upset and it feels better to blame him for everything. So he ignores their apology.

"I haven't smoked in a week. I know that's not much but I'm trying. It's harder than it seems." He says with a bit of attitude.

Jimin kicked him out because he was smoking weed. He heard his friend's concerns about becoming addicted and moving on to stronger drugs. He knows that his friends are worried about his health. So, he stopped smoking. But the pills made up for it. They take longer to hit but gives him a longer high.

"What matters is that you're making an effort," Jimin explains, wiping under their eye. Jeongguk glances at them and notices their eyes are teary.

"I was too harsh on you. I just didn't want you to get arrested one day because you got caught with drugs a-and I didn't want that stuff in my house. Plus, I was dealing with a lot with my relationship. Yes, I know this isn't an excuse for yelling at you and kicking you out. I just want you to know why I did it."

"I understand," he mumbles. "But...you didn't have to blow up on me like that. I-I had a lot going on in my life, too. I've been dealing with a lot and nobody even noticed."

What comes to mind is the fact that he's exactly what Jimin said he was. A drug addict. On pills to the point where if he doesn't take at least one a day, he gets anxiety. No matter how much stress with school and his personal life he gets, he'd still be expected to be the same. To smile and laugh and be there for friends who can't even tell he's suffering. Hobi must've felt the same way. Dealing with a lot alone and not saying anything because she was afraid of being judged.