Journey To Nowhere

019: At Last

Matthew

AFTER many hours of out running those men who tried to take us away, we finally found a good place to stay the night.

Lahat kami ay nakapa-ikot sa maliit ma bonfire na ginawa nina Elvis at Nirvana.

Ilang oras na rin ang katahimikan na nanatili sa paligid, walang umiimik dahil rin siguro sa pagod at dinadigest ang mga nangyari.

Akala ko ay ligtas na kami dahil binigyan nila kami ng magandang damit at higaan, hindi pa rin pala.

Lalong lalo na't nalaman ko na ang tatay ko ay isa sakanila.

I have never thought that he would participate on something so cruel and evil to humanity. It just means I don't exactly know my own father. Which I literally don't.

Kumawala pa ako ng isa pang buntong-hininga at uminom ng tubig na nakuha lang rin ng tatlong nakakatanda.

Napa-isip ako, kung hindi namin sila nakilala, siguro lahat kami patay na. I'm very thankful that we've met them. Siguro sakanila pabuhat at palamunin lang kaming lahat but they still stayed. Of course, konsensya nalang rin siguro nila.

"We have been there." Mahinang sabi ni Nirvana habang naka-kalong sakanya ang kanyang kapatid.

Most of us don't understand what she meant so none even dared to speak.

Bumuntong-hininga muna siya bago mag patuloy.

"Everything that was there was all the doing of Thanatos Institute." Sabi ni Nirvana na mas lalong nagpa-kunot sa noo namin.

"They have captured us once before this pandemic happened...we successfully escaped...and they had us again this time, they had us all to experiment with our brains." Dagdag ni Nirvana.

I think I can keep up.

"Care to explain what the hell is Thanatos Institute?" Inis na sabi ni EM, halatang hindi gets ang pinag-uusapan.

Bumuntong-hininga si Nirvana.

"If I explain...You'll hate your father like we do." Sabi ni Nirvana at tumingin sa akin.

Napa-kagat ako sa ibabang labi.

Tumingin naman ako sa bonfire, not minding their stares.

"I already hate him before. No need to change feelings now." Malumanay na saad ko.

Walang magbabago sa nararamdaman ko simula nang magkaron ako ng kakayahang makapag-isip mag isa.

"Okay." Nirvana said, I saw her put the bottle of water down the ground and clasp her hands while she sits comfortably on the wood we're sitting as she leans forward.

"Thanatos Institute started on the year 2013. All I know is that they do all kinds of experimentations there. From humans to animals. Especially humans." Nirvana started. I just stared at the fire, making the woods burn as they light up our dim surrounding.

"I don't know who is the real CEO of this Institute but...I do know the head of the experimentation laboratories for humans...which is Dr. Benedict Mikhail Arquero." Dagdag ni Nirvana.

Napa lunok ako nang marinig ang pangalan ng tatay ko.

I still could not believe there is such a thing...experimenting on humans.

Nanatili lang kaming natahimik habang nagkekwento siya. They're very eager to listen.

"They've performed experimentation on humans since humans are the most accurate of all living things. They've started on mixed breeding, enhancing a person's senses, trying different features forcing upon humans."

Mixed breeding? Enhancing? Ano ba? Gagawa ba sila ng superhero?

"Why do I know all this? Because I was one of the experimented humans." Sabi ni Nirvana na ikinagulat nang lahat.

Doon ako napatingin sakanya at hindi sa bonfire.

Pinakita niya sa amin ang naka lagay sakanyang pulsuhan.

"They call me twelve." Sabi ni Nirvana.

May nakalagay na numbers; 012.

That explains it.

"Kaya pala." Mahinang sabi ko agad.

"This is number 1. Elvis is the first person on this city, Puerto Princesa City, that had been forced to be experimented on because of his features." Saad ni Nirvana.

Napa tingin kami kay Elvis.

"Kinidnap ba naman habang naga dilig ng mga halaman." Inis na sabi ni Elvis habang napa-kamot sa ulo. kaya napa bungisngis kami.

"Elvis was forced dahil gusto nilang baguhin ang pagka-kuba niya. Naniniwala silang pwede pa siyang mag bago...They were successful, yes, but they didn't stop there. Kung ano ano pang pinanggagawa nila kay Elvis, humantong na siya sa puntong hindi na niya kaya. I witnessed him...being electrocuted." Dahan dahang sabi ni Nirvana, inaalala ang nangyari.

Nakita kong lumunok muna siya bago mag patuloy. Umayos siya ng upo, sumandal naman siya sa cabinet na naka lagay sa likod. Umalis na si Minerva at pumunta kay Wiguel.

"Wiguel is number 28. Mostly, ang kinukuha lang nila ay ang mga wala ng pamilya katulad naming dalawa. Me and Minerva was homeless that time and he was just 9 when they took him." Sabi ni Nirvana, pinipigilan ang sariling maluha. Tumingin siya sa ibang direksyon.

"Even though tinatakan nila akong 12, Inuna nila ang kapatid ko. Minerva was just a baby, she was very unresponsive for a baby kaya pinagka-abalahan siya ng mga doctor. When she turned 5, nagtataka nalang ako dahil bigla bigla siyang aayos ng tayo kapag may paparating na mga tao na hindi ko pa nga naririnig o nakikita pero siya...alam niya kahit malayo pa."

"That's when I overheard the doctors saying Minerva has this, super hearing stuff going on her and I didn't know how to react. It was causing her migraines so bad that the doctors had to separate her from me."

"Next thing I knew, I was the one being toyed. I was grateful na tinantanan na nila ang kapatid ko." Sabi ni Nirvana at napa buntong-hininga na naman.

Wala kaming ginawa kundi ang makinig lang. Sympathizing for her is all we can do at the moment.

"Lagi akong nagigising nang nanghihina at hindi maka galaw. They drained the hell out of me hanggang wala pa rin silang makuhang improvement sa akin." Pahina nang pahina na sabi ni Nirvana.

"Dr. Arquero....He's the one who made us suffer." Wiguel said habang naka tingin sakin.

Hindi ko naman alam ang magiging reaction kaya umiwas nalang ako ng tingin.

"Kaya laking gulat namin na malamang tatay mo siya." Sabi naman ni Elvis.

"I...didn't know he was part of this. I'm sorry dahil sakanya, hindi kayo nabuhay nang matiwasay katulad ng ibang tao." Mahinang sabi ko habang naka tingin sa sahig.

Naramdaman kong hinawakan ako ni Elvis sa balikat at hinimas himas yun na parang pinapakalma ang pakiramdam ko habang nanatili akong hindi maka tingin sakanila.

Nakakahiya. Nakakahiya ang mga pinanggagawa mo sakanila.

"You didn't know and don't think na kasalanan mo to dahil hindi. Ang tatay mo at ang may-ari ng Institute ang may gawa nito...Pagbabayarin natin sila." Sabi ni Elvis.

Naramdaman ko ring lumapit si Nirvana sakin, umupo siya saking harapan at pinilit na itaas ang ulo ko gamit ang daliri niya kaya naman wala akong magawa kundi sumunod.

"We're not saying this para ikaw ang sumalo lahat ng ginawa ng tatay mo, alam naming nagsasabi ka ng totoo at wala kang kaalaman tungkol dito. We want you to not burden yourself. Don't ever blame yourself. Dahil bass sa mga pinapakita mo, ikaw agad sumasalo lahat. Wag ganon, Matthew." Malambing na sabi ni Nirvana.

I want to cry. No one has ever said those words to me and this is the first time to ever hear that, it's very comforting.

Pinigilan ko ang sarili sa pag tulo ng luha at tumango kay Nirvana. Dahil doon ay niyakap niya ako, sumunod naman si Elvis.