My Only Sunshine

Chapter 42

We left Gemma and Clay's after her revelation. Jax was pissed and I knew that. I couldn't necessarily say I blame him because, I knew if it were my mom, I'd be pissed too. We got back to his place sort of late but he sat at the kitchen table sewing the patches back on his kutte. I had to say, I wasn't stoked on the way Jax had decided to stay, but I was relieved that he was staying. I sat there, rubbing my belly and wondering where the violence was going to end. First Gemma, then me, who is next?

"I can't help but wonder where the violence is going to end, Jax." I told him. "Your mom and I deserve retribution. The retaliation has to happen, but where does it end?"

He thought about it quite intensely before answering. "This retaliation has to be smart. We haven't ever seen an assault like my mom's or yours. They went for the matriarch to try and unravel us and when she didn't give us the message, they went after the VP's old lady. At this point, Clay finally understands that we have to be smart and we can't just kill them blindly. This could send the sons back on track. This could be what we need to get the club out of guns and go legit for good." Jax theorized.

"I sincerely hope that is true. I don't think the club can handle much more. I don't think us old ladies can either." I told him, but seconds after, there was a knock at the door. Jax grabbed his gun and I stood behind him as he opened the door. Clay stood on the other side, looking semi broken.

"Sorry, I know it's late." Was all he said. Abel began to cry and I was going to get him but Jax offered and he and Clay walked down the hallway to a crying Abel after Jax handed me the gun. I did some cleaning while they talked. It wasn't long before Clay left. Jax had to be up early for church so he headed to bed. This was the first time I hadn't gone to bed with him. I sat at the kitchen table, thinking about everything. I drank an herbal tea and then decided to call it a night. Jax was sound asleep when I went into the room, so I did my best to be as quiet as possible. I stripped off my shirt, pants, and socks. I slipped on one of Jax's reaper crew shirts before crawling into bed and curling up into Jax's side. Subconsciously, he wrapped his arm around me. Smiling softly, my brain shut off and sleep consumed me.

The next morning, Jax was gone early for church, but Neeta was there, so I headed to the club house. I was sitting at the bar, contemplating what to do. I should do something for Gemma. Something to take her mind off everything going on. I went on my phone and checked my bank account. Maybe I could take her shopping or something. It wasn't long before the guys exited the chapel. Jax walked over to me and kissed me softly. He did his little head nod, basically asking me what was up.

"I want to do something for your mom, she's been through a lot, I was just checking my bank account is all." I gave him a small smile.

"You haven't really been working, so how is your bank account?" He showed genuine care about how I was doing financially.

"I have money for bills this month and then I am tapped." I sighed. "I need to get on working. You good if I work the next couple nights? I'll have to get Neeta to stay." I told him the truth.

"Babe, I can take care of us, you know?" He told me softly.

"I am capable of working, Jackson." I was clear.

"I'm not saying you aren't. I just want you to know that I can cover you, if you wanted to do something else instead." He was hinting at me going to school.

"What I want to do right now is let go of my apartment," I told him and waited for him to tell me to keep it.

"Go ahead. It'll be less stress. You stay at my house anyway, let's just move the rest of your stuff in." I looked up at him shocked.

"Wait, really?" I stood up and kissed him before he even had the chance to respond to me. I wrapped my arms around his neck, but pulled away before I got carried away.