The Love They Never Had: The Nam Mansion

Chapter 55: Dobal (Provoked)

"You brought in an epileptic lowborn orphan for your servants to serve as if my status was suddenly raised in your home. So of course they resent me; I've caught them putting hellebore in my water, my food was always served raw and I used to go to sleep hungry. So of course I took food from the kitchen; unless you saved me just to torture me like this" the look she gave me sent shiver's down my spine and in that moment I swear, I had never hated my father more in that moment for what he forced me to do to her and the brother that she forgot she had. I wasn't her brother but I knew how much Hwi loved her, cared for her and tended to her as her carer, and I vowed that I would make up for everything my family had put her through; starting with protecting his only living family member with ever fibre of my being. I told my father I would take care of this and that from now on, everything that concerned Yeon was my business before I took her by the arm and I dragged her back to her room so I could interrogate her properly.

Fall back, leave her alone, stop following her everywhere she went... I tried to tell myself this over and over again with little success. No, this couldn't happen right now. I had so many things to think of right now; I had to protect Yeon and her brother whilst simultaneously trying to protect my own interests but that wasn't even the worst of it. But her presence her alone was already eradicating the loneliness and burdens I had to suffer here once the mansion gates closed behind me. And what she did just now...I was actually more impressed with her than when I met the first woman I had felt any sort of attraction to in my entire life...but she despised me with just as much venom as my own father did. But Yeon...

And just like that, the minute I thought about warmth my mind instantly thought about Yeon without reason or even my permission at all. The way her eyes looked for me just as before that were full of...emotion that I was unaccustomed to. The way her eyes looked straight at me that day without a hint of hesitation or disgust for what I was...she looked at me like I was a man, and with the respect that I could only dream of possessing one day.

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He followed me all around the mansion that day and wouldn't stop until he got his answers from me about the maid, not even when I had reached my quarters and he had followed me inside without asking for my permission at all. "What were you talking about with the maid? What shouldn't I worry about? You know that your safety is my responsibility right?" "Can't you just leave it alone? I don't like people prying their noses into my business, and I do not like to have backups in my fights ok?" He gave me such an incredulous look that it was hard not to laugh at despite the mood that we were both in right now. "You should probably pick up your jaw, Young Master" I was still laughing when he finally realised what I was saying. He looked...startled and taken aback, which I could tell he was not used to at all. "What? Did I do it again?" "Yes...you did..." he trailed off in amazement as I made my usual rounds of apologies, this man did ultimately take me into his home and gave me so much; a roof over my head, food, warmth...and a whole bunch of things that I had never asked for before...so I asked him to always compare my mannerisms and speech to how used to be, but I was beginning to lose hope of ever regaining my memories and I had no idea how I used to behave with him before so I just got used to apologising to him if I behaved any differently towards him than I used to. But for some odd reason, I was starting to feel like he liked the way I was now. And even how he was being now was not what I was used to at all, most of the time he kept me at a distance, but it was when we were very rarely left alone with each other that he was a completely different person around me, and I still had no idea how to react, so what else could I do but to keep him at a distance myself? He could do it to me all day long but when I did it to him then he got unnecessarily bothered by it that always confused me. He still refused to answer anymore questions about my past life, he mostly walked straight past me in the company of others but he privately expected me to do what exactly? Even now he was getting so close to me that he was the one who was violating the moral laws between men and women...and he seemed so comfortable with it. I on the the other hand was engaged in an internal conflict between my mind and my heart, and even my body seemed to naturally gravitate towards me as I found myself getting close to him enough to place my hands lightly on his arms to calm him down with no ill-intention at all. Men and women were not allowed to freely mingle with each other never mind touching each other until marriage, but here he was pulling me in so close to him that my heart was about to jump out of my chest and I close to fainting in his arms. Did all men treat women who were close to them like this? Like they owned them?