The Love They Never Had: The Nam Mansion

Chapter 2: Bul-An (Unsettlement)

"...You might be half as attractive as Yeon is." Just what the hell was I thinking? What was coming out of my mouth? I didn't mean it the way that she would take it! I just...I...I needed to clear my head badly, but I had nowhere to go without Hwi. So I could only vent out my anger out at a woman...girl that I had been longing to get rid of, and who knew that it would be Yeon would be the one to give me this opportunity? I had to remind myself to thank her for this, I could even grant her her wish of planting trees if it made her happy. But as far as I knew, she had never seen these trees before around the village, so how did she knew about them? "Kim Chun-Ae has forgotten her place and even goes so far as to discipline my guest without my knowledge. So I shall reward her with the Scarlet Red." My father was so obsessed with the palace and having even more power than he already had, that he even ran this household as if he were a part of the Imperial Family himself, which included mimicking their punishments. Bu so far, my father had never needed to punish anyone like this. "My Lord? The Scarlet Red?" "Your legs will be beaten with wooden sticks that are 2 inches thick and 5 feet long until there is a scarlet red pool of blood on the ground." I didn't care how cruel I sounded, I just made the servants drop off the supplies and I even rewarded Yeon with some dessert I had one of my servants find for the marketplace for her before I left in a fit of rage. And I had to admit that hearing Chun-Ae beg for her life did give me a little satisfaction. But before I could even step foot away from a room that I didn't want to be in, I could already hear the other servants whispering about Yeon and cursing her for Chun-Ae's punishment. Dealing with women were a lot different than men, and I knew only too well what they were capable of, and over my dead body was I going to put Yeon through the same thing. So I had to come back and set Yeon a punishment so she could be shielded from the cruel tricks that these servants could pull in the name of my father. But what I had said about her was already replaying in my mind over and over again and I could not for the life of me look her in the eyes.

"My servant was disrespectful to you and I have punished her, but you also caused the problem." "Young Master...?" "You cannot escape the punishment Seo Yeon, so I will have you first grind ink-stones before you transcribe a book of women's etiquette that I shall send you tonight." Her high pitch voice that pleaded for her innocence was going to undo me completely if I stayed a moment longer, so I got the hell out of there before I could be tempted to look at her 'new look' that even made Chun-Ae insecure to do what she did today. But doing what I had to do today just made me feel even more guilty than I had been feeling, so I needed a drink and fast, so she wouldn't be on my mind all day just like her damned brother was. And normally I would go to the local brothel so I could feast my eyes on Han Hui-Jee, who was the most beautiful woman that I had ever met with Hwi before I...did what I was forced to do. Even if she didn't like me as much as she clearly liked Hwi, there was still some sort of hope that she could be the one to maybe show me the kindness and affection that I had always wanted if she had already spent the day with myself and Hwi and not worry about being affiliated to someone like me.
But once again, before I could step foot outside of the Nam residence, I had a small voice in my head telling me that Yeon could still potentially face some danger in my household now that I had punished my father's favoured maid. And as much as I yearned to see Hui-Jee again so I could breathe, nobody could replace Yeon's place in my heart as my...childhood friend. And it most definitely showed when I decided to stay in this miserable place for the first time in my life rather than escape for as long as I could before I had to return.

So I spent the rest of the day studying from the big piles of books that my father gave me every single week to get through. I really did not know how I was going to face her after what I had said and acted in front of her, but I had to figure out a way for us to interact with each other if we were going to start living with each other. Maybe I should act like her brother? There was no point in acting like how I did before if she couldn't remember her. Should I start treating her like a friend? A little sister? A confidant? Or should I act like a disciplinarian? No way, her brother had never so much as raised his voice to her, so who was I to do it? I should just be her brother, that wasn't too far off what out relationship was in the first place.
Soon enough the evening came and I decided to make my way to Yeon's quarters again to see how she was fairing. No matter how she was in the past, she never caused any trouble and she didn't deserve to be punished for anything at all.
"...didn't she always have her face in a book? Didn't she always want to learn? In that case, let her carry out the punishment of the young master. But..." "but what?" "It is too bright in her quarters, you had better extinguish two candles. A woman should write beautifully, even if her eyes are closed. If she complains about it, then tell her that the young master made her do it again."