The Love They Never Had: The Nam Mansion

Chapter 65: Isanghan (Peculiar)

I couldn't face or talk to anyone, not that there was anyone for me to talk to. I ran straight to Ihwaru, ignoring the kisaengs and I instantly barked for bottles of liquor to be sent to my room and I drank until I couldn't see straight. I wanted to be knocked out of my senses for as long as I could, trying not to think about what on earth I had done to receive this kind of life where had no control over anything, not even my own fate or future. Why couldn't I get anything I wanted the easy way? Why did I have to fight for ever single scrap of happiness? Where were my loved ones now when I needed them? Driven away by myself and my father. And just what did my father expect? For us to live with himself and Yeon who he wasn't willing to let go until he got a few more services from her brother who was now gambling with his own life for her? And now how on earth was I going to face Yeon now when I needed her the most? Was I just supposed to shrivel up and die, unloved and unwanted? My father had well and truly killed any chance of anything happening with myself and the one person in this world that truly loved me sincerely and would never want to leave my side form the bottom of my heart. I barely figured out how to repair my relationship with Hwi and now it was going to look like I was pushing Yeon out of my life with this crazy woman attached to my god-damned hip everywhere I went.
The Seo's and my role in the palace were not the only problems that I had; how on earth was i to rid myself of that concubine now without Yeon's help? No matter how helpful she had become to me, i still had to respect her brother's wishes no matter what circumstances we were facing. And now what do i say to Yeon? Thank you for your help, but I no longer need you? So what? Return to my mother's quarters and just rot there until i come up with my next move to free us all from this hellhole that we were living in and keep my job in the palace at the same time? And keep my father from killing us all when the Seo's had served their purpose? What do i do? And how do i do this all at the same time? I no longer had Dal by my side as he was now dead set on chasing Yeon around to exact some sort of revenge on me. Very well, Yeonnie was too clever not to see through his tricks and even after everything i had been through, I still would not want to find myself at the end of Hwi's fist when he found out what Dal was up to.

I barely had a sip before i felt someone come up slowly behind me, and there was only one person I knew who's footsteps were that small and delicate. "Seon-Ho? Are you ok?" How? How did you find me, Yeon? Did you look for me after you couldn't find me after work? Did you know that I was upset? How? Did you even leave my father's home? Yeon, I am more sorry to you that you can ever even imagine. I'm sorry that I am holding so much from you, I am sorry that I cannot tell you what you are dying to know...please forgive me...

But it wasn't Yeon this time. In fact, it was the very last person that I had ever expected to approach me and without a hint of hatred in her eyes for me for the very first time...in years. I was honestly too stunned to speak and I had no idea how to react when Han Hui-Jee of all people made her way over to me with an unusually worried look on her face that I certainly was not used to at all. She even...she even placed her hand onto my shoulder, as she sat right down next to me and so closely that I could feel her breathe on my skin. It was all very sudden and I had suddenly started panicking out of nowhere. What should I say? What should I do? Do I tell her about Hwi? Where has she been? What happened to her? What the hell do I do...

"Er...um....here, have a drink...with me." "You haven' changed much, you still stutter when you talk to me." Her smile made me smile and it put me at ease for once. She hadn't changed her looks or her scent at all, and she still wore a lot of pink, unlike Yeon who had been wearing a lot of blue recently...

"...Seon-Ho? Seon-Ho? Are you listening to me?" "I'm sorry?" "I was trying to apologise to my behaviour towards you all this time. I know that your father is the one who is pulling all of the strings and making you even go against your own best friend. Life must be rough for you right now."