The Love They Never Had: The Nam Mansion

Chapter 85: Yeongyeoldeon Kkum (Connected Dreams)

I had just been released from my charge against the third prince, but I was to resume my duties in the Genral Inspectors office until the results of the kidapping case had come to light. My team had just caught a gang of men who were being bribed for the eunuch exams for the palace after days of planing, stakeouts and research. I never used to really pay attention to how many days I spent away from home but now I couldn't help myself I had just gotten into bed and started thinking about her all over again. Despite the dates I had been on with Hui-Jee, I still couldn't get what I had done with Yeon out of my mind. I really should stop torturing her like I have done and I shouldn't cross that line again. I just craved a single moment of bliss, of happiness and I had gotten a lot more than that, and I suddenly couldn't hope but to compare the two women. Hui-Jee was mature, Yeon acted like a woman when she wanted to but she still had that childish air about her that constantly wanted attention from me and only myself. She liked to laugh and play childish pranks randomly whist Hui-Jee was a little stiff and it was hard for her to smile after what she must have gone through in Hwi's absence. Yeon was attentive, caring and nurturing whilst Hui-Jee was a little demanding and throughly knew her likes and dislikes. But Yeon lived in her own world and was refreshingly different, whilst Hui-Jee lived in a competitive environment where everyone followed the same beauty trends and strived to be the best at it.

I soon fell asleep in the midst of my thoughts, only to be rudely awoken to a dream I was having about the day I got drunk with Hui-Jee the last time I was free, and we tried something that just wasn't working whilst being intoxicated. I wasn't as embarrassed or as upset as I thought I would be though, unlike Hui-Jee who could barely look at me at the time. I rememberer making up some excuse on how I wasn't going to treat her like a kisaeng and that I wanted to marry her before we did anything of that nature. Then what on earth possessed me to act drunk and started kissing Yeon instead? What gave me so much confidence to cross that line? And why did I even begin to miss her in Hui-Jee's presence? Beojji. That was what Yeon tasted like and smelt of when I foolishly kissed her in front of everyone, very sweet and fragrant beojji. When I ventured out on this work trip, I made sure to buy a very big bunch of cherries that unfortunately only lasted on the journey there.

I dreamed of that day and exactly how it went, except for the fact that I never left the brothel. I was still with Hui-Jee and still trying when I was suddenly disturbed by the sound of Yeon's voice that seemed to permeate through the walls of the room that we were in. It genuinely scared me to the point where I could feel the colour drain from my face even thinking about if Yeon had caught me with another woman. But then I saw her in front of me as clear as day, making her way into our room without glancing at me even once. But what shocked me even more was the fact that she was followed into the room...by myself. But it was a form of myself that I couldn't recognise. I...I was smiling. Quite widely as well, which was so unlike me. Even to this day, I do not think that I have ever smiled like that in my entire life. And my hair was totally out like hers as well, which was something that I never did.

I was totally transfixed on this scene that was appearing in front of me where Yeon was wearing an outfit that fitted her so well that I could see everything; how slender and fair she was, even without makeup. It confirmed everything that I had been secretly fantasising about ever since that night, and I was more than pleased. And so was the other form of myself that had just sat down when Yeon ordered a small feast for the both of us. She fed me well, she served me my drinks and she was fantastic company; her childish nature was doing everything she could possibly do to make me laugh and blush until dinner was over. We then both lay down with full bellies and just spent a few silent moments in each other's company, until Yeon secured herself in my arms she started kissing me just as much as I did that night, if not more! She wad just kissing me like it was the most natural thing in the world to do...she kissed me like she owned me. And the other me certainly felt the same way when Yeon suddenly placed herself in my lap and began to gently undress me as if was the woman in this relationship! I in turn did the same thing to her in a less than gentle manner until we suddenly stared acting like unrestrained and untamed animals. Never in my life did I think that such pleasure existed, at least not to the extent that I was now witnessing for myself for the first time. I had my full, which left us both breathless and in awe of one another. But what I was not expecting was for Yeon to suddenly climb on me for another round; Yeon with the most sensual body I have ever seen, Yeon who didn't leave an inch of my body untouched and Yeon who kept moaning and whispering for more, more of my attention and efforts until she nearly lost her damned voice. She couldn't keep her lips away from mine, she couldn't resist playing with my hair and she demanded her fair share of pleasure until she couldn't take it anymore. Simply the way she wouldn't let up off of me almost left me howling like a dog and barking for more. Up until this moment, I had been confident that I would marry Hui-Jee, but seeing myself happy and free with Yeon was something that I could only dream of even when I was with her in the brothel. We acted like we owned each other, and seeing how Yeon dared to take charge of me and accomplish it...I do not think that I could possibly have this with Han Hui-Jee; no matter how she treated me now, our past still stung me badly.