traded my life [TWD]

『6』

"What the hell were you thinking?"

"God, dude, you can't even wait until we get to the car?" I complain.

Shane had signed my guardian slip to get me out of holding. When we walk out of the Linden station, the sun was finally starting to come up.

I walk over to the cop car. Shane whistles.

"We're over here," he redirects.

I look at the Jeep. Go figure he wouldn't have brought his work car- he was off hours.

"Why did Rick call you?"

"You'd better be glad Rick called me instead of coming himself. He was ready to chew your neck out."

I open the passenger door and climb into the nice vehicle. I'd never been in either man's regular car. Just hours ago, I was in Q's car for the first time. Today was just full of firsts for me.

"But, he has work in the morning. I was just getting off my shift and heading home when he called."

I slump against the door as Shane drives us out of the parking lot.

Tears stung in the back of my eyes. Would Q get out? Was he going to be okay?

"That boy don't give a shit about you."

Goddamn mind reader..

I look at Shane. "Don't."

"He's seven years older than you. He's just taking advantage of you-"

"That's not true!"

"I've seen dozens of fucked up guys like him in my life."

"He's different!" I argue.

"Yeah? Does he treat you good? Nice enough to make you think there's a chance but mean enough to make you fight to have his attention on you?"

"He's just.. He doesn't trust easy. I blame pigs like you and Rick and the-"

"Does he order you around more than he tries to get to know you?"

"I-" my words falter and fall flat.

"Remind you that you're too young for something to happen but doesn't cut you off? Keeps you hanging around thinking maybe-what if- one day?"

A tear slides down my cheek.

"Does he listen to you? Or does he just let you talk and brushes it off because you're not mature enough to take seriously?"

"Fuck you!" I scream.

I reach for the door handle, ready to fling myself out of the moving car. Shane is quicker and hurriedly locks the door from the buttons at his side.

"Hyejin!" he snaps, pulling the car off to the side of the road.

"No! No! Fuck you!" I sob, slapping his chest. "You don't fucking know me! You don't know Q!"

"Hyejin!" 

"You're a sorry fucking pig that gets off on having power over those weaker than you?"

"I do? Well, guess what, sunshine? So does your little boyfriend."

Cries rattle through my body until I'm almost hyperventilating. I jerk the seat belt off and bury my face in my hands- only able to sob for a few minutes.

After a while, Shane unbuckles his own seat belt and turns to look at me. "Hyejin."

"Fuck off."

"Look, you gotta know these things. It's time someone tells you the truth. Me, Rick, the other officers, we've been letting you off with warnings and shit. We can't keep doing that. Tonight was a big fuck up and it's time you own up to it."

I just shake my head and look out the window. 

"Now, who do I need to call? Your mom or dad? Sister?"

My temper builds again until it breaks like a fever and I burst into another sobbing fit.

"My dad's dead," I make out between all the tears.

Shane is shocked. He scoots a little closer.

"He was involved in gangs back in Korea. Shit went down and they jumped ship to bring us here. The fuckers tracked him over here and killed him."

Shane lets out a long sigh. "I'm so sorry," he says in a hushed whisper.

"Mom is in Korea looking for his killers. That's her 'business trip'. She thinks they'll come after us next."

"And your sister?"

I sniffle and wipe my face with Q's jacket sleeves that was still around me. "I don't know."

"What do you mean?" he asks.

"After mom left for Korea, it was just the two of us. Jiwoo.. She thought maybe she could figure something out from the people here. Maybe the guys from Korea enlisted some locals to do the dirty work so they didn't have to go back and forth overseas. She got into the gang shit, too and.."

"And?" Shane pushes.

My hands fall to my lap. "She was going on a roundup.. She just.. didn't come back. She's been gone for three months and hasn't given any sign of.. anything."

"Hyejin," Shane says my name with sadness.

"She got involved in this shit and she's still out there," I sob. "I told Q and he said he'd help any way that he could. I.. I can't give up on finding her, Shane. I can't give up on Q!"

"So, are you on your own? Is that house just.. a ploy? Do you live on the streets?"

"No," I admit. "It's our family home. I live with my dad's sister."

Shane breathes out in relief. I scoff. Might as well break that idea of hope while we were at it.

"She's just watching me to get dad's life insurance money. She beats the shit out of me for breathing too hard."

"Goddammit," Shane mutters and runs his hand over his mouth.

"I'm not your problem," I remind. "So, just let me go and I'll.. God, I'll stop fucking around and annoying you and the other guys."

"You are now," he argues. "You are my problem now."

I rest my head on the seat.

"You don't have a fit guardian. You need help. So, will you let me help you?" he continues.

I shake my head. I couldn't accept a cop's help. They would bring everyone down. Even if Shane found Jiwoo, he'd just arrest her. She's done too much. Hell, if I was of age, he would've arrested me months ago.

"Hyejin, please."

I shake my head in denial once again.

Shane sighs and buckles back up. He drives us back to King County in complete silence.