traded my life [TWD]

『10』

"So, I was thinking.." I begin.

"Ah, shit," Shane comments.

I set his plate down in front of him and shoot him a glare.

"I still have some stuff at my old house. And.. I'd really like to have something of my parents and Jiwoo here." I sit down across from him at the table. "Would that be okay?"

"Of course that's fine. When do you want to go?"

"Well, I was thinking about going tomorrow before school starts back. But.."

"But?" he repeats. "There's always a 'but'."

"I kind of wanted to.. go.. alone.."

Shane leans back in his seat.

"I just wanted to spend some time there.. I don't know when I'll have time to go back again."

I could see a plan form in his head. But, that's fine. I wanted to know his plan. This was a chess game.

"All right.." he gives in. "Do you need a ride?"

I keep my grin internal. I was winning.

"No, I'm just gonna walk."

"Carrying a shit ton of stuff?"

"I don't need a whole lot. Plus, it's not a far walk."

He slowly nods. He wasn't letting me off that easy.

"Okay. Then, I'll see you when you get back."

Checkmate.

--

I stop at the mailbox of my house and open it up. Shane had mentioned putting the mail on pause, but mom could've sent something.

I do a sneaky look around the area. It felt weird to be back here after weeks.

But, I spot Shane's patrol car at the end of the block with ease. I laugh to myself as I walk to the door. He could be a little less predictable. 

I ease into the house and peer out the window carefully. He'd pulled around the the house next door- still watching my every move.

The house felt weird empty. Sure, when my aunt was here it was tense and shitty. But, with just me here, it felt kind of.. lifeless? Dull?

I shake off the goosebumps and make my way to my room.

Paranoia eats at me as I make sure there's no way Shane could possibly see what I was doing. I scold myself for being afraid and set to work.

I hurry to the closet. I tug one of the boxes at the bottom out- it was full of childhood shit. But, right now, it was just a step stool so I could reach the top of the closet.

I shove open the attic door and grab onto the top shelf in the closet. With a big jump, I crawl into the attic. My feet dangle out as I sit on the edge.

The dust was even worse than usual. I fan it away and tug another box closer to me. I had three up here that my aunt didn't know about. I couldn't afford, literally, her finding out about them.

"You're gorgeous," I tell my emergency pack of cigarettes and kiss the pack.

I toss the boxes down onto the floor below and crawl back out of the attic. I grab dad's old military bag and begin stuffing it with important shit I might need.

Packs of cigarettes that I had back just in case. Q's phone number written on a dirty old napkin. Dad's life insurance check and the information to the rest of it. 

I double check around the house to make sure I didn't need anything else. But, I doubt the bag would hold much more. I nod to myself, tell the house a silent goodbye, and walk outside.

Shane was a bit further down the road- now on the opposite side I had to walk to go back to his house. I almost smile.He was damn determined and thorough, I'll give him that.

--

When Shane walked in the door, pretending he didn't know anything going on, I greeted him with a wave.

"I thought you were working late today?" I ask.

"Leon took an extra shift. I think he's having baby mama issues."

"'Baby mama', 'baby daddy', this is why children grow up to have mommy and daddy issues, you know?"

"I think it's just a people issue," he admits, plopping on the couch. "Did you make it to your house?"

Idiot. I smile a little.

"I did.. I actually found something.. I'm not sure what to do with."

"What's that?" he asks, moving to the edge of his seat.

I was sitting on the floor with some of the stuff spilled out among me. I stashed the cigarettes and Q's number somewhere Shane wouldn't look. The rest of this shit was a ploy, to be honest.

"My dad's life insurance check," I say and hold up the paper. "It's only the first installment.. I have the information on the rest, but.. I don't really know what to do."

I could tell that Shane was shocked I even let him in on the secret. He knew that was the 'reason' my aunt beat the shit out of me. He knew I kept telling her I didn't have it.

"Well, technically you can't do anything with it since you're a minor."

Stupid fucking number on a paper. I was always too young for this or that. Bullshit, I hate licing here.

"Your mom would have to receive it. Or, she can hold off until you're of age and you can take it since you're next of kin."

"She thinks I should go live in a foster home," I reveal, tossing the check onto the table. "She thinks living with a cop is dangerous for me."

Shane laughs. Sarcasm dripped from the tone and I find myself smiling again.

"Yeah, well, next time she says that, remind her that this 'dangerous cop' saved your ass from going to juvey."

"Will do, Narc."

He scoffs but it turns into a laugh and I giggle as well.

"I'm gonna order some pizza," he decides, standing up. "Usual?"

Pizza was find, but we were going to work out at the gym tomorrow before his shift. The grease made me sick just thinking about it.

"Can we go out?" I wonder.

"I just got home," he complains.

"Yeah, but we're going to the gym in the morning."

Shane smiles. "All right. Let's go."

I stand from the table and ditch everything else. 

It felt nice to go somewhere and not worry about bringing anything. Before, I would have to take care of myself. Living with Shane, I just had to bring myself.

He didn't know about Q's number in my pocket, though.