The connection - New beginnings

Chapter thirty two - I'm here for you brother

Nate

It had been a couple of hours since Chase had picked Alex up and I was currently sat in the kitchen mulling over things in my mind. I looked absentmindedly at the now cold mug of coffee in front of me that I'd made and forgotten to drink. What the hell had Alex been thinking, I was sure she didn't see me in that way anymore. I hadn't seen it in any of her thoughts since she had been back in town and I certainly didn't feel like that towards her. I mean we'd had that one slip up when we kissed but that didn't mean anything, we both knew that and I'd been honest and told Jules about it straight away. Jules. What was I going to say to Jules? I loved her, she'd helped piece me back together after Alex had left. Sure it wasn't like we could read minds and have crazy tingles and emotions but it was just as meaningful in its own way. I loved her and I couldn't lie to her about this any longer, I had to tell her everything. She deserved to know the truth.

I pulled out my phone with a sigh, I had a text from Chase.

We need to talk, meet me at the coffee shop from breakfast

Guess I might as well get this out the way. Alex was bound to have told him about her dream and he was probably ready to kick my ass for getting between them again. I'd never expected us to grow close but I was glad that we had and I couldn't help but feel a pang of regret that it was likely all about to come to an end. He'd probably feel threatened, I'd probably feel the same in his position. I guess I better just get this over with. I shot off my reply telling him I'd be there in ten before placing my mug in the sink and grabbing my car keys on my way out.

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As I pulled up I spotted Chase leaning against his car with two take away coffees in his hands. His expression remained neutral as I walked towards him.

"Here, thought we could take a walk" he held out his arm passing me one of the coffees 

"Thanks" I mumbled feeling confused. This wasn't what I had been expecting at all. He actually seemed rather calm. Maybe he was just waiting until we were away from the public eye before he tore into me. I noticed him watching me and a shot him a weary smile as he turned and headed up the path to the side of the coffee shop. We followed the path silently for a few minutes before it got too much.

"Look Chase, I'm sorry for what happened with Alex. I don't know what she's told you exactly but I just want you to know that absolutely nothing happened. I didn't-" he raised his hand to silence me mid sentence.

"I know" he looked at me intently and I stared back looking confused

"You know?" Know what exactly?" What had she told him, had she told him what happened at all because he was acting very calm for someone who just found out his girl had a sex dream about their brother.I shifted my wait from foot to foot as I stared back at him waiting for an explanation.

"I know about the dream. I know you didn't do anything wrong, in fact I heard you were rather upset about it" he asked with a raised brow. He's right, I was upset. I didn't want her to be thinking of me in that way anymore. I didn't want to be with Alex like that. 

"Yeah, I guess I was" I admitted feeling slightly ashamed that I was angry at Alex after everything she had been through. I was mad at her that she could have potentially ruined my relationship not only with Jules but with Chase. 

"Nate, there's a lot  going on right now for Lex. She's still coming to terms with what's happened to her and the people around her are too. I've been so careful to make sure I don't push her into anything  she's not ready for and I think the girls have been really careful about what they say around her too, which is completely understandable on all parts because we all just want what's best for her. But she's still Lex, the way she feels hasn't changed and if anything this happening to her has probably made her try to suppress her feelings and desires because that's what she thought she was supposed to be doing. Turns out her mind had other ideas. Nate she's mortified that she had that dream about you, I can feel it. She is absolutely devastated that she's ruined her friendship with you, she's worried about me and also about how Jules might react. She didn't mean for it to happen"

"Then why did it? This isn't exactly the first time she's had dreams about one of us and I just don't want to get mixed up in all that again" I didn't want to be the bad guy in this situation but what I was saying was true, she'd had dreams about us before and we ended up fighting over her and it tore us apart. I didn't want that again for any of us.

"It's not like that Nate I promise you, If you would give her a chance to show you her thoughts you'd see that too. She was just frustrated" he pleaded with me

"Frustrated?" I asked not quite understanding what exactly he meant by that

"Sexually....the girls had been talking about sex, and since everything happened me and her we haven't been close like that" a flash of embarrassment filled his face.

I shot him a surprised glance. I know I couldn't even begin to fathom what she must have gone through or still be going through but it had always been clear to me that the connection was electric, you could lose yourself in the passion of it. I had no idea that they weren't together like that. I guess I'd just assumed.

"I didn't want to push her, she's been through so much. I didn't realise she was even thinking about anything sexual happening. She never said. But with the sex talk at the sleepover and then you being there to comfort her, it just made her mind wander. I can assure you that she didn't mean or want it to happen"

I looked at him in disbelief, so was this really just a coincidence? Was I just in the wrong place at the wrong time? Why didn't she just have a dream about Chase then.

"I don't know Chase, I just feel a bit weird about it I guess"

"Listen, do you really think I'd be standing here this calmly if there was any chance in hell that I thought she'd had that dream about you because she wanted to be with you and not me" he cocked his brow at me again and I couldn't help but let out a little smirk. Sure enough I knew he'd be kicking my ass right about now if he thought there was anything really going on between us.

"Guess not..but I still feel weird about it. I think it's best if me and Alex put some space between us"

"Might be hard with the girls becoming such good friends?" He questioned, I knew he was right but I also knew what I had to do about that.

"I think I'm going to have to tell Jules" I deadpanned  

"How are you going to explain that one?" His brow scrunched up in confusion 

"I'm going to tell her everything"

"Everything?" He asked, his voice sounding surprised as his gaze met mine

"Everything. She deserves to know the truth" I let out a breath before taking a sip of my coffee

"I'm here for you brother" Chase raised an arm to my shoulder and gave it a light pat. Was I really going to do this, tell the girl I loved about this whole crazy connection. Would she believe me, would she still want to be with me? Only one way to find out.